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Thread: Dating favours r-strategists in western world?

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    Default Dating favours r-strategists in western world?

    The r/K selection theory, coined by E. O. Wilson, concerns the trade off between the quantity of offspring produced and the quality of care and devotion given to each of them. From the Wikipedia article:
    r-selected species exploit less-crowded ecological niches, and produce many offspring, each of which has a relatively low probability of surviving to adulthood. In contrast, K-selected species are strong competitors in crowded niches, and invest more heavily in fewer offspring, each of which has a relatively high probability of surviving to adulthood.
    In this conceptual framework, humans are clearly a K-selected species. Frogs and spiders, in contrast, are examples of r-selected species.

    Intraspecies differences exist as well. In Race, Evolution, and Behavior, Philippe Rushton describes human populations as existing along an r/K continuum, with blacks nearest the r side, Asians nearest the K side, and whites in between
    here are two strategies that living things can use to create the next generation with the limited amount of energy they have available for reproduction: (1) They can invest that energy in a large number of progeny, putting only a little energy into each one so that, although most will not survive, there will be so many of them that a few will survive (an “r” strategy), or (2) they can invest that energy in only a few progeny, putting more energy into each one (e.g., as food in an egg, larger size at birth, body fat, milk, or care after birth), so that each one has a better chance of surviving (a “K” strategy). 1 Salmon, for example, have an “r” strategy, laying millions of eggs that are then abandoned; most die, but enough survive to make the next generation. An elephant, on the other hand, has a “K” strategy, having only a single 170 to 250 pound baby after 22 months of pregnancy, which is then nursed by the mother for three to five years. Most living things are in between the extreme “r” and the extreme “K” strategies. All humans have a very “K” strategy, but the races differ considerably in how “K” they are. 2
        J. Philippe Rushton has done a superb job of documenting racial differences in reproductive strategy (Rushton, 2000a), concluding that blacks are the least “K,” Asians the most “K,” and Caucasians in between, but close to Asians. 3 This racial order of reproductive strategy is a direct consequence of our evolution from a more “r” orientated ape. All the races descended from an ape; Asians evolved the most away from that ancestor, Africans the least, and Caucasians in between, but close to Asians. African men have a stronger sex drive due to higher testosterone levels, a higher sperm count due to larger testicles, and behaviorally they have well-honed and fairly indiscriminate seduction skills
    r-organisms K-organisms
    short-lived - long-lived
    small - large
    weak - strong or well-protected
    waste a lot of energy - energy efficient
    less intelligent, experienced... more intelligent, experienced...
    have large litters have small litters
    reproduce at an early age - reproduce at a late age
    fast maturation - slow maturation
    little care for offspring - much care for offspring
    strong sex drive - weak sex drive
    small size at birth - large size at birth
    These days in western countries women don`t need that much men anymore to be a provider, so they end up having sex with males who are most aggressive in clubs, kind of like in Jersey Shore. That is why nordic/east asian men are having kind of hard time to attract women because they are most K-strategists, while blacks, latinos and some alfa-whites are getting a lot pussy because they are R-stategists.

    And that is why there is so many single mothers these days.

    Last edited by random777; 02-13-2014 at 05:11 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by random777 View Post
    These days in western countries women don`t need that much men anymore to be a provider, so they can all mate with alfa-males, kind of like in Jersey Shore. That is why nordic/east asian men are having kind of hard time to attract women because they are most K-strategists, and blacks, latinos and some alfa-whites are getting a lot pussy.

    And that is why there is so many single mothers these days.

    they maybe have sex with blacks and browns but they will end up with white and east asian guys later on. Because those have the money.

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    No shit Sherlock?

    Here....watch this.....


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    I see some truth in this viewpoint. That's why I think as a Chinese American, I'm way more balanced than Chinese guys from China, who are primarily focused on their education and getting wealthy in order to attract a mate. Since I grew up in the US, due to social pressures, it made me focus as well on working out, being physically in shape and being able to entertain women, but luckily due to my Chinese upbringing, I've also been focused on education and wealth building. Whereas a lot of the Chinese guys from China, or the more clueless Chinese guys growing up in the US just follow the nerdy stereotype and have a hard time attracting women, or when they finally get a woman, they are so whipped and cater to their every need like some modern day servant.

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    James Holmes and the "dark night" of men's social role.

    I have been reading a lot about the James Holmes "Dark Knight" massacre lately. Many of my colleagues here on PsychologyToday.com have given their own theories on the matter. I'd like to add my own—which is a little bit different...

    Truth be told, I don't believe Holmes is as unique or deviant as it would be comfortable to think. This type of behavior is on the rise. So, I think we need to look beyond the individual for the cause. We need to look past the symbols of Batman and Joker in this particular case. We need to look beyond "pathologizing" the person, to understanding the social and systemic factors that are creating such behavior.

    I believe those causes fall within my usual domain of discussion—love, relationships, and gender roles.

    What is Wrong with James Holmes?

    It is clear that Holmes is angry and violent. Many have suggested that it was due to his failing in school. Perhaps latent narcissism or mental illness. But, beyond labeling him a "loner", few have looked at Holmes' social life.

    The fact of the matter is that his love life was miserable. According to reports, he has never had a girlfriend. Right before the shooting, Holmes even tried to find love and sex on an adult casual sex website. He was rejected by all the women he contacted (see here). These were women looking for cheap, quick, anonymous sex to begin with! Talk about feeling rejected...

    Now, we could go with the prevailing theory and say that Holmes is deviant and odd. By being deviant, he would be unattractive to the opposite sex. So, his miserable love life is an EFFECT of his problematic behavior.

    But, I take the opposite approach. I propose his miserable social life is the CAUSE of his acting out. His subsequent behavior is therefore a result of social isolation and lack of love. It is the consequence of his confusion about being rejected. It is the outcome of having some of his basic needs denied. It is the spark that led to that frustration and rage.

    Killing for Love

    So, James Holmes was rejected by women... How does that lead to killing? To answer that question, we need to take a step back.

    Initially, James Holmes did everything right that society told him to do. He was a "good guy". He was smart, ambitious, motivated. He had a good life ahead of him. In years past, that would have made him very desirable to women. In today's world, however, it didn't get him very far... Today, it made him a loner and a nerd, with no social skills and no dating prospects.

    Why then turn from a nerd to a killer? That is, unfortunately, very simple. More women love killers than nerds. Being a killer today is more socially and sexually rewarding than being a "good guy". Countless women write love letters and beg for conjugal visits to death row inmates (see here). Even Holmes himself has already begun collecting adoring female fans on Twitter who think he is "hot", "sexy", and "cute" (see here).

    Therefore, Holmes killed because he actually benefited socially from the behavior. He is now being rewarded with love and attention. He will get more adoration (and possibly sex) as a mass murderer than he ever would as a neuroscientist. If he avoids the death penalty, then he might find himself very popular indeed.

    How We Reward Men

    I'm primarily discussing this topic because I believe it highlights a larger social issue. An issue, if not dealt with, will result in more of this behavior in the future. It is an issue that won't be fixed by saying some specific individuals are sick, sad, or crazy either.

    The fact of the matter is that social rewards are backwards. A man will get more attention and fame through infamy than accomplishment. As a whole, people can often identify serial killers better than Nobel Prize winners. Not to mention that current gender roles and culture norms devalue hard working "good guys". Women, in turn, follow that social information, popularity, and status when assessing who to select as a "mate". So, we have a mess.

    My point is a simple behavioral one. People perform behaviors where rewards outweigh punishment. Holmes found all punishment and no social reward in doing the right thing. Many other men face that similar situation. Holmes has subsequently found more reward in infamy (no matter how he is punished). How long before other men become disillusioned, disempowered, and follow suit? How long before doing "good" is so unrewarding and punishing for guys that deviant behavior is actually the better option?

    Sure, we can rely on the empathy and morality of these men to not go in that direction. But, does that mean they are any less tortured or desperate? Shouldn't we fix the desperation and change the reward structure, rather than just shaming men into enduring punishing "good" behavior that gets them nowhere?

    Given that, perhaps it is time to take this discussion beyond the context of one man. Perhaps it is time to have a frank discussion about the "demise of guys". Maybe we should really look at what behavior men are being REWARDED for by respect and sex, rather than simply the behavior they are EXPECTED to perform out of social duty. Perhaps we should look at the types of men we're teaching our daughters to love and respect—not to mention respect for good, hard working, men in general. Perhaps we should stop socially turning women off to the guys that we'd like in our society.

    Conclusion

    James Holmes' behavior cannot be condoned. But, it can be understood. As long as hard working and "nerdy" men are disrespected and devalued as the punch line of every sitcom—while serial killers are made famous and swooned after—there will be more frustrated men following the social rewards of deviant behavior. It will only stop when we once again make the "right" behavior the socially rewarded behavior for men. Until that time, this deviant trend will no doubt continue to get worse. Holmes is not an enigma, nor an isolated incident.
    James Holmes was hard-working K-strategists but it didn`t go very well because western countries reward R-strategists.

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