Better to be Loved or Feared?

[The Ripper]

BS relates necessarily "kindness" with "weakness", and i think he meant that these qualities suit well on women, but not on men.
And my point was: it's not a matter of gender (male or female), but only of "intelligence": the intelligence of a person lie in his capacity to balance strength and courtesy, compassion and power, and so on.
I hope you understand me now: i just don't think that kindness or strength are exclusive qualities of only one gender.

I understand your point, but your initial reply to BS showed that you misunderstood his, so I just tried to clear the misunderstanding.

[The Alchemist]

Personally, I would respect, obey and help a lovable authority more efficiently than a hateful one. No matter if I liked it or not, I would be tempted over and over again to betray the authority that produces fear in me, whereas I would be inclined to give myself to the lovable one even if I was not getting any advantage at all. I think this is the key why imposition and fear are not lasting tools in the end.

I think 99% of us have the same feeling towards obedience and impositions
Especially me, who i have always been very rebel towards any hierarchy.

[The Alchemist]

I understand your point, but your initial reply to BS showed that you misunderstood his, so I just tried to clear the misunderstanding.

Nahh, i understood him but i was just provoking him about men's presumed "strength" ;D Anyway it's all right, everyone has got the right to have his own point of view

[The Ripper]

I just can't help myself..

BS said

People will walk over you [males] (especially women) if you are kind.

We [males] are fucking brutes... Deal with it

(added brackets mine)

To which you replied that you are kind and no one walks over you, or something to that effect. To which BS quite rightly replied that you are female.

[The Alchemist]

I just can't help myself..

BS said


(added brackets mine)

To which you replied that you are kind and no one walks over you, or something to that effect. To which BS quite rightly replied that you are female.

Ok ok, i understood that he meant what happens to a "weak" man, my point is just that there are no such differences between men and women!! People walk over you even more when you're a woman, when you're not strong enough But kindness and strength can coexist easily

[Teyrn]

Ok ok, i understood that he meant what happens to a "weak" man, my point is just that there are no such differences between men and women!! People walk over you even more when you're a woman, when you're not strong enough But kindness and strength can coexist easily

Kindness is often a luxury that simply can't be afforded or desired but this is more true in ideological conflicts (against terrorism, nazism, etc.) than in interpersonal conflicts (boyfriend/girlfriend).

Strength tempered by kindness is a human ideal that's rarely attained outside of some kind of saintly religious or philosophical figure- whose positive characteristics are almost always exaggerated,