Names of Evangelical Churches

[Megrez]

THE CHURCH
WHERE JESUS
IS THE HEAD

I talked a little about the shitty Charismatic movement and Evangelical churches in South America in a response to Osweo in the Damaged Goods thread, and now I'll post here the (translated) names of some brazilian evangelical churches, just for fun purposes.

Adventist Church of the Seventh Divine Reform
(because the reform is never done right... it's worth doing seven)

Pentecostal Church Jesus Was Born in Bethlehem
(wow)

Pentecostal Evangelical Church Trust I in Bible
(you're doing it right)

Pentecostal Church of the Blue Fire
(perhaps it's a blow torch?)

Church I.W.B.T. (I Want the Blessing Too)
(of course, huh?)

Crusade of Emotions
(it doesn't lack emotionalism in these churches...)

Church Dekanthalabassi
(it does really exist!)

Church Key of Eden
(who wants to hike in paradise, just ask the church janitor for the key)

Community of the Recycled Heart
(nothing is lost, everything transforms...)

Pentecostal Evangelical Church The Last Embarkment for Christ
(if you congregate in another church you have to go swimming...)

Automotive Church of the Sacred Fire
(most known members: Schumacher, Montoya, Piquet...)

Evangelical Association True Even Underwater
(we only accept divers...)

Evangelical Crusade of the Pastor Waldevino Coelho, the Highness
(the church of the evangelical Pope)

Church Cave of Adullam
(we only accept bandits, swindlers and fugitives)

Evangelical Church Jesus' Little Flower
(how cute!)

Evangelical Church Adam is the Man
(and Jesus is the good guy! lol)

Pentecostal Church Jesus Comes, You Stay
(erm...)

Pentecostal Evangelical Church Spit of Christ
(oh no, stop the mess...)

Pentecostal Church Christ Planet
(members won't be caught up together, they'll be sent to B-612 Galaxy instead)

Church 'L' for Love
(***with the pastor Courtney Love!)

Congregation Step for the Future
(head office: NASA)





If someday you find a church with a name like these in your country... be very wary.

Taken from: http://rededejovensieadampf.blogspot...1_archive.html

[Smaland]

Megrez, I am gentleman enough not to mock your religion, or lack of one. You should do the same for all the Christians here at the forum.

[Megrez]

People put those names in their churches and I am the one disrespecting the religion? LMFAO

Also, my mother is catholic and she simply hates these evangelical congregations. She knows they are themselves a mockery to Christianity.

[Osweo]

Megrez, I am gentleman enough not to mock your religion, or lack of one. You should do the same for all the Christians here at the forum.

C'mon, Man! THey're clearly whacko crazy rubbish weirdo churches! We don't have to respect this sort of 'Christian', surely??!??! If we did, we'd have to acknowledge that Christ sort of... sat on his arse and did piss all for 2000 years, waiting for his REAL spiritual heirs to appear, thereby damning .... millions upon millions of souls to hell.