why women should think twince before having children

[crazyladybutterfly]

beauty issues :

Throughout your life -- and especially during pregnancy and breastfeeding -- the size and shape of your breasts can change. Breast size is determined by how much fatty tissue there is. Making milk creates denser tissue in your breasts. After breastfeeding, both the fatty tissue and connective tissue in your breasts may shift.

Your breasts may or may not return to their pre-breastfeeding size or shape. Some women's breasts stay large, and others shrink. But sagging or staying full can be as much a result of genetics, weight gain during pregnancy, and age as a result of breastfeeding.

Will My Breasts Sag or Become Flat?

When you're nursing, the flow of milk can stretch your breast skin and tissue. That leaves some women with an "empty" or "stretched out" look to their breasts when the milk-producing structures shrink to the size they were before you got pregnant. It's a common cosmetic breast problem after breastfeeding, but it isn't a medical concern.

Will Breastfeeding Cause My Breasts to Be Misshapen?

Each breast is independent. So what happens to one breast during breastfeeding won't necessarily happen to the other. Breast engorgement, or painful overfilling of the breasts with milk is a common condition that may leave one breast slightly misshapen afterward, for instance.

What's the Treatment for Misshapen or Asymmetric Breasts?

When breast size or shape changes a lot after breastfeeding, some women consider cosmetic surgery. A breast lift, called a mastopexy, can be performed to help sagging and to reposition the nipple and areola (the dark circle around the nipple) higher on the breast.

http://www.webmd.com/parenting/baby/after-nursing#3

Our largest organ — the skin — can do crazy things when we’re pregnant. From stretch marks, to varicose veins, to acne, to spider veins, the list goes on.

Most of these problems disappear after delivery. Unfortunately, there’s still weight gain and loose skin to deal with.


Made of collagen and elastin, our skin expands when we gain weight. It has a hard time returning to the shape it once was.
First and foremost: my stomach. I am finally coming to terms with the fact that it will never, ever be the same. That I am not One Of Those Lucky Women And You Know Who You Are Okay Yeah I’m Just Jealous. Around week 38 of my first pregnancy, I erupted in stretch marks. Not the deep purple lesions that some women get, but white-ish textured zebra stripes spreading outward from my belly button in a hurricane-like weather doppler formation. My skin remains fairly even in color but weirdly dimpled in texture. My belly button sort of droops and the stretch-marked-up skin around it sort of hangs loosely, having never fully recovered its once-glorious elasticity. No matter how much I exercise (and I do — I can do more crunches than my husband and somewhere under all that skin are some decently hard abs), the pooch remains. It sticks out a little bit and droops over my pants when I sit down in all its muffin-top glory. It doesn’t seem like it got particularly worse after my second pregnancy — no new stretch marks, at least — but I’m slowly resigning myself that this is as good as it may get. Unless I get a tummy tuck. Which…I’m not getting a tummy tuck. Tankinis and shapewear for everybody!

http://alphamom.com/your-life/postpa...-here-to-stay/

[Queen B]

If your issue with having or not having children is your boobs, then you don't deserve to have kids anywa.

[crazyladybutterfly]

mental health :

The birth of a baby can trigger a jumble of powerful emotions, from excitement and joy to fear and anxiety. But it can also result in something you might not expect — depression.

Many new moms experience the "postpartum baby blues" after childbirth, which commonly include mood swings, crying spells, anxiety and difficulty sleeping. Baby blues typically begin within the first two to three days after delivery, and may last for up to two weeks.

But some new moms experience a more severe, long-lasting form of depression known as postpartum depression. Rarely, an extreme mood disorder called postpartum psychosis also may develop after childbirth.

Postpartum depression isn't a character flaw or a weakness. Sometimes it's simply a complication of giving birth.

Postpartum psychosis
With postpartum psychosis — a rare condition that typically develops within the first week after delivery — the signs and symptoms are even more severe. Signs and symptoms may include:

Confusion and disorientation
Obsessive thoughts about your baby
Hallucinations and delusions
Sleep disturbances
Paranoia
Attempts to harm yourself or your baby
Postpartum psychosis may lead to life-threatening thoughts or behaviors and requires immediate treatment.

There's no single cause of postpartum depression, but physical and emotional issues may play a role.

Physical changes. After childbirth, a dramatic drop in hormones (estrogen and progesterone) in your body may contribute to postpartum depression. Other hormones produced by your thyroid gland also may drop sharply — which can leave you feeling tired, sluggish and depressed.
Emotional issues. When you're sleep deprived and overwhelmed, you may have trouble handling even minor problems. You may be anxious about your ability to care for a newborn. You may feel less attractive, struggle with your sense of identity or feel that you've lost control over your life. Any of these issues can contribute to postpartum depression.
Left untreated, postpartum depression can interfere with mother-child bonding and cause family problems.

For mothers. Untreated postpartum depression can last for months or longer, sometimes becoming a chronic depressive disorder. Even when treated, postpartum depression increases a woman's risk of future episodes of major depression.
For fathers. Postpartum depression can have a ripple effect, causing emotional strain for everyone close to a new baby. When a new mother is depressed, the risk of depression in the baby's father may also increase. And new dads are already at increased risk of depression, whether or not their partner is affected.
For children. Children of mothers who have untreated postpartum depression are more likely to have emotional and behavioral problems, such as sleeping and eating difficulties, excessive crying, and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). Delays in language development are more common as well.

http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-c...n/con-20029130

Stress is an inevitable aspect of parenting. It can begin in pregnancy, or even earlier for people with reproductive issues. By the time a child is born, no parent is immune from the stresses of their position.

How to handle feeding, choosing a sleep training method, or even deciding where the child is going to sleep (bed share or crib) are all examples of stressors facing new parents.

As the child grows, discipline becomes another source of stress. In addition, there is the misconception that parenting stress ends when the child reaches a certain age. This, and other incorrect assumptions, often contribute to parenting being harder than it has to be. Often this leads to adrenal fatigue and a collection of physical symptoms.

These are the facts. First, the stress you feel as a parent will continue throughout course of your life and the life of your children. The sources of that stress, and how best to deal with it, is what changes as you and your children grow.
https://adrenalfatiguesolution.com/parenting-stress/

If they're being honest, most mothers will tell you that no matter how badly you want a child, the transition to parenthood is hard. Really hard.

According to a recent study, the drop in happiness experienced by parents after the birth of first child was larger than the experience of unemployment, divorce or the death of a partner.
The ickiness you feel in pregnancy as your body becomes alien to you. The childbirth, and the healing after. The breastfeeding struggles -- oh, the struggles and the tears. The isolation of being home alone all day with a crying infant while your partner is at work.
At least, that's what it was like for me, when my first child was born in 2011.
A new study suggests when people experience early parenthood -- pregnancy, childbirth and the baby days -- as particularly stressful, they are less likely to want to do it again.
The study by the Max Planck Institute for Demographic Research in Rostock, Germany, found "the larger the loss in well-being, the smaller the probability of a second baby." The effect is especially strong for highly-educated parents and those who waited longer to have a second child.
http://edition.cnn.com/2015/08/12/he...nd-child-irpt/

Parenthood is a transformative experience—imposing a unique mix of stress and rewards for those who enter (Nomaguchi & Milkie, 2003). At least since McLanahan and Adam’s (1987) review, social scientists have generally concluded that, at least when children are young, the costs appear to outweigh the benefits in terms of effects on parents’ well-being.
Early parenting experiences do not become irrelevant to parents’ well-being after children grow up. Rather, early life course experiences have long-term implications for well-being throughout middle and later life.
Not surprisingly, interest in the psychological implications of childlessness has also increased. Recent studies suggest that parents of minor children are more distressed than their childless counterparts

Generally, childless young adults report better well-being than parents (Nomaguchi & Milkie, 2003), although one study found that childlessness in young adulthood may be stressful in the context of thwarted fertility intentions, especially for women with lower family income (McQuillan, Greil, White, & Jacob, 2003). As for childlessness at midlife, Koropeckyj-Cox, Pienta, and Brown (2007) analyzed national, cross-sectional data to compare the well-being of childless women and mothers in their 50s and found that childlessness was not associated with worse psychological outcomes in midlife. It was women who became mothers early in the life course who experienced lower wellbeing—largely because of marital disruption and fewer socioeconomic resources.

Childlessness was associated with higher rates of depression and loneliness, but only for unmarried men. Consistent with this U.S. finding, a cross-national study based on data from Australia, Finland, and the Netherlands revealed that formerly married men who were also childless reported particularly poor health (Kendig et al., 2007). In contrast, unmarried childless women appeared to fare well in later life.

Bures, Koropeckyj-Cox, and Loree (2009) analyzed a national cross section of mid- and late-life adults and found that the childless exhibited less depression than parents. This positive image is further supported by cross-national data showing that never married childless women had high levels of social activity (Wenger, Dykstra, Melkas, & Knipscheer, 2007) and were more highly educated than other groups of women (Koropeckyj-Cox & Call, 2007).

The available evidence suggests that childlessness has few costs for psychological well-being and may even be associated with enhanced well-being, at least for certain social groups.

stress undermines parental well-being. For example, Wickrama and colleagues (2001) found that parental stress was positively associated with increased risk for early onset hypertension in a sample of married individuals. Moreover, this effect was significant for women but not men, reflecting a general theme of gender differences in the effects of parenting on well-being, presumably because women shoulder primary responsibility for child care, even if they also work outside the home (Bianchi, 2000; Blair-Loy, 2003).

One strong line of research over the past decade focused on stress associated with children’s emotional, developmental, and behavioral disorders (MacInnes, 2008). Unfortunately, these problems are not rare. The National Center for Health Statistics (2007) reports that 2.1% of children age 5 – 11 have speech problems, 1.8% have learning disabilities, 1.1% have mental retardation or other developmental problems, and 1.2% have other mental, emotional, or behavioral problems. Learning disability becomes more apparent with age: Among children age 12 – 27, 2.6% have learning disabilities. Early, Gregoire and McDonald (2002) analyzed 164 families of children with emotional disorders over an 18-month period and found that parental strain associated with children’s emotional and developmental disorders had significant adverse effects on parents’ psychological functioning. Gross, Shaw, Moilanen, Dishion, and Wilson (2008) analyzed a sample of parents who had children at risk for conduct disorder over a 2-year period and found that children’s behavioral problems contributed to mothers’ depression but not fathers’. A cross-sectional study using daily telephone interviews with 82 middle-age parents found parents of children with disabilities had elevated levels of negative affect, stress, and physical symptoms (Seltzer et al., 2009).

There is general consensus that parental stress is greater as individuals make the transition to parenthood and when children are young (Kluwer & Johnson, 2007). Moreover, individuals in certain social contexts—for example, unmarried, women, lower socioeconomic status—are more likely to experience parenting as stressful because they encounter more life strains around parenting

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3159916/

[crazyladybutterfly]

If your issue with having or not having children is your boobs, then you don't deserve to have kids anywa.

let me finish. a woman should be prepared before having a child , this means knowing all consequences that pregnancy and motherhood can cause

[Ilma]

Women should be aware of side effects pregnancy and having children can produce but if you really want children they will always pass before yourself. You are GIVING birth, if you already think about it as your children will have a debt towards you and you would be resentful to them, better not have children.

This is the only true reason you have to think twice if you want children or not... are you able to love them and give them everything ?

[Lightshade25]

Get a boob job then.

[Al-Meksiki]

Children are a horrid cancer in my opinion. I would never want one, and if my feelings to the infant children of my freinds is an indication, would grow to hate them immediately.

[Peterski]

Children are a horrid cancer in my opinion. I would never want one, and if my feelings to the infant children of my freinds is an indication, would grow to hate them immediately.

You are transgender (born a male), so you can't be pregnant anyway.

Plus you hate yourself and all of humanity, as you've admitted before.

[Al-Meksiki]

You are transgender (born a male), so you can't be pregnant anyway.

Plus you hate yourself and all of humanity, as you've admitted before.

I was born infertile bc I have Kleinfelters

My Fiancé wants to adopt kids and its been a point of contention between us, because I absolutely am against having children at all, but he wants them and thinks he'd be a good parent, while I think id be a terrible parent and am against it

[Peterski]

My Fiancé wants to adopt kids

Which one? Because you have two of them at the same time, IIRC.