I ask as, as corny and cliched as it may sound, I don't think a man can really know himself unless he has be in one. These thoughts of Nietzsche's come to mind - From "beyond Good and Evil":
“-we believe that severity, violence, danger in the streets and in the heart, secrecy, stoicism, tempter’s art and devilery of every kind - that everything wicked, terrible, tyrannical, predatory and serpentine in man, serves as well for the elevation of the species as its opposites:- …and in any case we find ourselves here, both with our speech and our silence at the other extreme of all modern ideology and gregarious desirability…grateful even to distress and the vicissitudes of illness, because they always free us from some rule, and its ‘prejudice,’ grateful to the God, devil, sheep and worm in us; inquisitive to a fault, investigators to the point of cruelty…owing to an excess of ‘free will’.”
As posted on Skadi, on September 26th, my most recent altercation:
I was in a fight today.
One of the power windows in my car stopped working, so I took it in for repair. I left, and missed my turn to head back to where I am staying for the moment (I'm still getting used to this area of South Florida). When I realised I had done so, I took the first left that I thought would lead me back to the correct road; it didn't - it ended in a culdasac. In the culdasac were 4 blacks that immediately started-in with that funny peacock-like thing they do. I began to round the circle, and they started shouting "white mother f***er" etc. etc. I paid no mind and continued in my turn. And then a glass bottle smashed against the back windshield. I stopped the car, pulled up the emergency brake, centered myself, got out of the vehicle, and took off my shirt. Of course, the first thing that they see is a chest-wide tattoo of this: [a black-sun wheel].
One of them says "Oh muthuh f***uh are YOU in the WRONG place!" - another says "dat look like my RIMZ!" (not sure what this means) and started laughing (see: I'm spelling like they talk), and walks toward me, then swings. I back my head away; he misses; and I smack him in the face. Same thing happens a few more times before he tries to tackle me at the waist. Which, you see, is a NO NO, as SuuT's forte is his take-down defence, submissions, and ground and pound. I relaxed my centre of balance, fell into his tackle, and shifted him into a kimora, slid him in and out of various ankle and wrist locks and a rear naked choke just to play. I let him go, and stood up and asked him if he was done. "FUCK YOU!" and another dive at my mid-section was his answer, and I noticed that the others were starting to walk toward me. So I let him eat my knee on his way into my waist, pick him up, and slammed him unconscious on the road. THe others just stopped and stared in seeming disbelief.
I looked at them and said,"you know, I think I was in exactly the right place today". I got in my car, released the break, and drove away.