Tell-tale signs early on that a guy or girl is likely to hurt/use/betray you.

[Sikeliot]

I feel this is a topic worth discussing since so many people are unaware of what should be red flags that someone you are starting to develop feelings for is somewhere down the line going to betray your trust, use you, or hurt you in a way you did not anticipate.

[Tannis]

The main two for me is when you need them most and they're not there for you/when you need to see them and they keep putting you off.

[Planeless Earhart]

If she makes an effigy of you using the bacon, sausage, and eggs on her plate, and then stabs it in the head, it's probably not going to work out. I miss her crazy eyes.

[Sikeliot]

That's an obvious one. I was thinking of more subtle clues and the following ones come to mind first;

1) They refuse to meet/spend time with your family or non-mutual friends. They will make excuses to not have to, and will bail out of plans.

2) Every compliment they give you is sexual in nature and/or relates to your appearance or body.

[Planeless Earhart]

Hm...
How about if they suddenly decide to change their appearance drastically, out o' the blue? Chances are, it isn't for you.

[Sikeliot]

Not wanting to go in public with you, constantly bringing up/comparing you to their ex, and every conversation making its way back to anything sexual are other signs.

[Tannis]

Not wanting to go in public with you, constantly bringing up/comparing you to their ex, and every conversation making its way back to anything sexual are other signs.

Oh the ex one for sure. It's happened to me quite a few times and it's definitely a bad sign.

[rhiannon]

My ex boyfriend really fucked my head up for a very long time. Some of the things he used to do:

• Openly flirted with other women right in front of me

• Become angry with ME for noticing it and saying something

• Refusing to call me his girlfriend

• Joking about how I was so in love with him and how it made him feel so good...and how he just didn't love me very much. He said this to me over dinner one night....a very nice dinner of which I was paying for

• Never wanted to take me on any real date. If we went out, we almost always went Dutch or I paid. Despite the fact we were both single parents in grad school (medicine)...and despite the fact he still had more money than I did.

• Accuse me of doing things or thinking things that were untrue

• Blow me off for days at a time...and pretty much ignore me during class (we were in med school together)

• Essentially show no empathy whatsoever for my feelings

• Make fun of me....constantly.

He was such a prick. But the sex was phenomenal....and so now you see why I got so fucked up over him. It is shocking to think how sex can be so insane with a person that treats you like shit. Thing is...he felt the same about me....sexually speaking. It didn't stop him from being a dickhead, though

[derLowe]

I know some gems for my friends and mine experience ,this one is about girls:

• Has a weird history she kept away from you for "your own protection".
• Can drink more than a 1 bottle of vodka and appear sober.
• Never appears at any important functions has a lame excuse.
• Has to be some where urgently but refuses to clarify where or gives you a lame excuse.
• Ask too many question about your finances than dose not laugh when you tell her you are a hobo.
• Keeps in touch with the EX that broke her heart.
• Keeps in touch with all her Ex'es.
• On the first date she exclaims : "My parents would love to meet you!"
• Says some thing to the effect of "..... We are exclusive, right?"
• Hangs out with "interesting" people.
• Comes from a broken home or a messy divorce home.( this does not necessarily means all people from homes like that are bad just a greater proportion.)

I got tons more, if you guys want.

[Hassad]

My ex boyfriend really fucked my head up for a very long time. Some of the things he used to do:

• Openly flirted with other women right in front of me

• Become angry with ME for noticing it and saying something

• Refusing to call me his girlfriend

• Joking about how I was so in love with him and how it made him feel so good...and how he just didn't love me very much. He said this to me over dinner one night....a very nice dinner of which I was paying for

• Never wanted to take me on any real date. If we went out, we almost always went Dutch or I paid. Despite the fact we were both single parents in grad school (medicine)...and despite the fact he still had more money than I did.

• Accuse me of doing things or thinking things that were untrue

• Blow me off for days at a time...and pretty much ignore me during class (we were in med school together)

• Essentially show no empathy whatsoever for my feelings

• Make fun of me....constantly.

He was such a prick. But the sex was phenomenal....and so now you see why I got so fucked up over him. It is shocking to think how sex can be so insane with a person that treats you like shit. Thing is...he felt the same about me....sexually speaking. It didn't stop him from being a dickhead, though

I suppose he did not act like this at first? This seems like a rather extreme "progressive devolving" situation.