Was Neanderthal Sexy?

[Vesuvian Sky]

There's alot these days as I'm sure we're all aware of regarding Neanderthal admixture causing the theoretical hybrid known as Cro-Magnon.

So the question is, why would this theoretical hybridization have occurred between Neanderthal and the other Homo-Sapien arrivals to Europe who had a more gracile non-robust look to them?

In theories in accordance with Natural Selection (how favorable traits play a role in how we choose mates) Neanderthal is now being considered intelligent as to why this may have occurred. Re-examination of Upper Paleolithic Moustrian archaeological assembalges/artifacts in Europe has led to this revamped view of Neanderthal and that the species was actually smarter then the Out of Africa arrivals to Europe c. 45,000 BC. This of course challenges the notion that Neanderthal was dumb and incapable of adaption and ultimately bred and/or killed out as has been the traditional view.

However, what about Sexual Selection? Some Neanderthal specimens are suggested based on aDNA analysis to possess SNPs responsible for lighter hair, eye and skin color. Similarily, Anthropologist Peter Frost argues this is why lighter phenotypes begin to appear in Europe:

Peter Frost is a Canadian anthropologist, he is best known for a hypothesis on the evolution of European hair, eye and skin color by sexual selection. He believes sexual dimorphism of complexion in humans acts as a cue for identifying a person's sex. Frost takes issue with the commonly accepted theory that the evolution of light eye and hair coloration is a side effect of natural selection for skin color, in order to maximize vitamin D synthesis in high latitudes. He contends that light skin preference acting with a imbalanced sex ratio and monogamous mating during the Late Glacial Maximum, resulted in novel hair and eye colors, and white skin, evolving by sexual selection.

So what do you think? Do you find Neanderthal sexy?:

Please vote.

[Ozzy]

I've got a theory that supports this.. Hear me out on this. I believe that Neanderthals were environmentally adapted to giving the greatest blow jobs imaginable. I have reason to believe that they just blew each other all day. Here, let me clear everything up with a fancy illustration.

http://m.UploadEdit.com/b008/1357952603335.jpg

The slope of their heads would fit a phallic object perfectly. I think this basically explains everything. What else did the enlightened ubermensch Neanderthals have to do all day, but blow each other to pass the time?

I believe that this adaptation was a double-edged sword, and they all died out in a similar manner to the dinosaurs.. While the dinosaurs were incredibly vicious due to sexual deprivement stemming from incredibly short arms and relatively small genitalia and social awkwardness, causing them to kill each other and the gravitational force of their combined virginities being strong enough to pull in comets to end their pathetically cruel, suicidal existences, the Neanderthals faced a different dilemma with a similar ending:

They'd died from a lack of nutrients from blowing each other all day. They became lazy and soft, and no longer made the necessary effort to ensure that they'd have enough food to keep their bodies going..

The chemical reactions that took place during orgasm and ejaculation gradually reduced their once great levels of testosterone and created another chemical called dihydrotestosterone(DHT) that caused hair loss and other issues. The testosterone lost was responsible for the loss of muscle mass, bone mass, mental energy, and physical energy.

At some point, the blow jobs had actually made them too stupid and impulse-driven to realize that such pleasurable activities were killing them and as long as they'd busted a nut they really didn't care.

The vitamins and nutrients lost with the expelled semen such as zinc further deteriorated their bones, muscles, flesh, brain, and even their eyes.

I'm still doing research, of course, as this is a recent development, but all of the pieces seem to be adding up to something coherent and plausible.

[Virtuous]

I am Cromagnid and this arouses me.

[Hurrem sultana]

[pinguino]

I bet lot of liberal Homo Sapiens Sapiens women would marry those Neanderthal guys.

[rashka]

How do they know that Neanderthals had such prognathism or huge mouths?

[Vesuvian Sky]

I bet lot of liberal Homo Sapiens Sapiens women would marry those Neanderthal guys.

Actually, you bring up a good point here:

does this count as some type of upper Paleolithic miscegenation?

[Virtuous]

If a Neanderthal punched your face you'd fly a distance of a football ground.

[Virtuous]

Guise, do I look Neanderthal, guise?

[Vesuvian Sky]

How do they know that Neanderthals had such prognathism or huge mouths?

Basically, you hire a forensic anthropologist to do a facial reconstruction based off the remains of a Neanderthal skull. That's how they come up with these reconstructions.