Óttar
02-03-2014, 11:42 PM
I was walking back from my late afternoon class today in the freezing fucking cold weather thinking about how freeze ass cold Madison is, and how I can't get out and do anything, because it's always so fucking cold. Today I have a cold, I'm exhausted, and my nose is running constantly. I'm out of cannabis, and can't cook any cannabis brownies because I have to get up at the ass crack of dawn tomorrow.
I sat down, got my homework assignment in my inbox, and remembered how we had to read William Carlos Williams' icebox poem, and define all these literary terms and exclaimed, "William Carlos Williams sucks! Anybody can write that dumb shit! William Carlos Williams can shove that cold plum in the icebox up his ass!"
Then a thought occurred to me that I can't possibly be the only person to think such a thing, and so I googled "William Carlos Williams sucks" and I stumbled upon this. Aside from the excessive cursing and vulgarities, I basically agree with it:
Who the fuck gives two fucks about wheelbarrows and plums, is what I want to know, because apparently there's this cocksucker named William Carlos Williams who thinks that he should write poetry about them and then there's you, Mrs. Marpole, who thinks I should write this dumbass fucking essay. So here's my thesis: William Carlos Williams (who has a stupid fucking name) can suck my cock, and you can too.
Here's an example of why William Carlos Williams was a cocksucker: he wrote a fucking note about plums. First of all, who gives a shit about plums? No one. No one fucking wants to eat plums. Those things taste like shit. The only person who would think plums don't fucking taste like shit is the kind of person who probably is used to tasting cocks. But if you were going to eat someone else's plums, you should just eat them and stop being such a motherfucking pussy about the whole thing. No one needs to read your shitty little note or your shitty little apology. Just eat the fucking plums.
And you know what fucking relies on wheelbarrows? Nothing. It doesn't matter what color the thing is, it's a fucking wheelbarrow and it's covered in fucking rain. A fucking wheelbarrow is not going to save anyone's life. No one has been laying around in their own shit and thought, "if only I had a fucking wheelbarrow, my life would be better". A wheelbarrow never saved anyone's fucking life and it won't fucking save yours. This is another reason William Carlos Williams is a cocksucking faggot, because he cares about a fucking wheelbarrow. The only people who give two shits about wheelbarrows besides grandmas are fags like William Carlos Williams.
Here's what I would do if it was up to me and I had a fucking red wheelbarrow: I'd gather up all of the stupid shit in the world, like William Carlos Williams' poetry, and his fucking body, and all the fucking stupid poetry in the world, and you, Mrs. Marpole. I'd gather you all up in the wheelbarrow, cover you in gasoline, and then set you on fire. Maybe I'd throw you in front of my truck and run you over and listen to the sound of your body as it broke under my tires. Either way I'd never have to write a fucking essay like this ever again.
And that, in conclusion, is what I think of William Carlos Williams.
And you, Mrs. Marpole. And you.
http://www.hitrecord.org/records/391676
I sat down, got my homework assignment in my inbox, and remembered how we had to read William Carlos Williams' icebox poem, and define all these literary terms and exclaimed, "William Carlos Williams sucks! Anybody can write that dumb shit! William Carlos Williams can shove that cold plum in the icebox up his ass!"
Then a thought occurred to me that I can't possibly be the only person to think such a thing, and so I googled "William Carlos Williams sucks" and I stumbled upon this. Aside from the excessive cursing and vulgarities, I basically agree with it:
Who the fuck gives two fucks about wheelbarrows and plums, is what I want to know, because apparently there's this cocksucker named William Carlos Williams who thinks that he should write poetry about them and then there's you, Mrs. Marpole, who thinks I should write this dumbass fucking essay. So here's my thesis: William Carlos Williams (who has a stupid fucking name) can suck my cock, and you can too.
Here's an example of why William Carlos Williams was a cocksucker: he wrote a fucking note about plums. First of all, who gives a shit about plums? No one. No one fucking wants to eat plums. Those things taste like shit. The only person who would think plums don't fucking taste like shit is the kind of person who probably is used to tasting cocks. But if you were going to eat someone else's plums, you should just eat them and stop being such a motherfucking pussy about the whole thing. No one needs to read your shitty little note or your shitty little apology. Just eat the fucking plums.
And you know what fucking relies on wheelbarrows? Nothing. It doesn't matter what color the thing is, it's a fucking wheelbarrow and it's covered in fucking rain. A fucking wheelbarrow is not going to save anyone's life. No one has been laying around in their own shit and thought, "if only I had a fucking wheelbarrow, my life would be better". A wheelbarrow never saved anyone's fucking life and it won't fucking save yours. This is another reason William Carlos Williams is a cocksucking faggot, because he cares about a fucking wheelbarrow. The only people who give two shits about wheelbarrows besides grandmas are fags like William Carlos Williams.
Here's what I would do if it was up to me and I had a fucking red wheelbarrow: I'd gather up all of the stupid shit in the world, like William Carlos Williams' poetry, and his fucking body, and all the fucking stupid poetry in the world, and you, Mrs. Marpole. I'd gather you all up in the wheelbarrow, cover you in gasoline, and then set you on fire. Maybe I'd throw you in front of my truck and run you over and listen to the sound of your body as it broke under my tires. Either way I'd never have to write a fucking essay like this ever again.
And that, in conclusion, is what I think of William Carlos Williams.
And you, Mrs. Marpole. And you.
http://www.hitrecord.org/records/391676