The metrosexual is dead. Long live the 'spornosexual'

[Kazimiera]

The metrosexual is dead. Long live the 'spornosexual'

20 years ago, Mark Simpson coined the term 'metrosexual'. But now a new, more extreme, sex- and body-obsessed version has emerged, he explains

http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02936/DAN-OSBORNE_2936565b.jpg
Dan Osborne (right) from TOWIE shows off his "spornosexual" form in Marbella

In a development which will probably have him running to the mirror yet again to search anxiously for lines, this year the metrosexual leaves his teens and turns 20.

How quickly your children grow up. Although it seems only yesterday, I first wrote about him in 1994 after attending an exhibition organised by GQ magazine called "It’s a Man’s World". I’d seen the future of masculinity and it was moisturised.

"Metrosexual man, the single young man with a high disposable income, living or working in the city (because that’s where all the best shops are) is perhaps the most promising consumer market of the decade," I predicted.

Two decades of increasingly out and proud – and highly lucrative – male vanity later, and the metrosexual remains the apple of consumerism’s rapacious eye. In a recent report, HSBC drooled all over his "Yummy"-ness, pointing out how mainstream metrosexuality has become.

This was of course old news to anyone with eyes to see the extremely image-conscious and product-consuming men around them – or in bed with them. Or the way that the glistening pecs and abs of men’s health and fitness magazines have been outselling the "lads' mags" for several years.

Or indeed anyone who saw the news last year that men in the UK now spend more on shoes than women.

From the perspective of today's fragranced, buffed, ripped, groomed, selfie-adoring world, it's hard to believe that the metrosexual had to struggle to be heard in the early 1990s. Most people were in "New-Lad" denial back then about what was happening to men and why they were taking so long in the bathroom.

http://i.telegraph.co.uk/multimedia/archive/02904/hedral-evans_2904030c.jpg
Metrosexual 2.0: rugby player turned model Thom Evans

Just as male homosexuality was still stigmatised and partly criminalised back then, the male desire to be desired – the self-regarding heart of metrosexuality – was scorned by many. Narcissism was seen as being essentially feminine, or Wildean – and look what happened to him. The trials of Oscar Wilde, the last dandy, at the end of the 19th Century helped stamp a Victorian morality over much of the 20th century. Male vanity was at best womanish – at worst, perverted.

The end of the 20th century, the abolition of the last laws discriminating against male homosexuality, and arrival of the preening dominance of celebrity culture with its Darwinian struggle to be noticed in a visual, "branded" world finally blew away the remnants of Victorianism.

To illustrate this, I only have to say two words: David Beckham, the working-class England footballer who became more globally famous for his attention-seeking haircuts, unabashed prettiness and rampant desire to be desired than for his footballing skills. Once the sari-wearing midfielder was outed in 2002 (by me again, sorry) as the ultimate metrosexual, everyone suddenly "got it". All that Nineties denial turned into incessant Noughties chatter about metrosexuals and "male grooming". But still people failed to understand what was really going on with men.

In fact, the momentous nature of the masculine revolution that metrosexuality represents has been largely obscured by much of the superficial coverage it got. Metrosexuality is, in a paradox that Wilde would have relished, not skin deep. It’s not about facials and manbags, guyliner and flip flops. It’s not about men becoming "girly" or "gay". It’s about men becoming everything. To themselves. Just as women have been encouraged to do for some time.

This uptake by men of products, practises and pleasures previously ring-fenced for women and gay men is so normal now – even if we still need to be reassured with the word "man" or "guy" emblazoned on the packaging, like a phallic pacifier – that it’s taken for granted by young men today who really have become everything. So much so that it can be too much for the older generation of metrosexuals.

With their painstakingly pumped and chiselled bodies, muscle-enhancing tattoos, piercings, adorable beards and plunging necklines it’s eye-catchingly clear that second-generation metrosexuality is less about clothes than it was for the first. Eagerly self-objectifying, second generation metrosexuality is totally tarty. Their own bodies (more than clobber and product) have become the ultimate accessories, fashioning them at the gym into a hot commodity – one that they share and compare in an online marketplace.

This new wave puts the "sexual" into metrosexuality. In fact, a new term is needed to describe them, these pumped-up offspring of those Ronaldo and Beckham lunch-box ads, where sport got into bed with porn while Mr Armani took pictures.

Let's call them "spornosexuals".

But unlike Beckham's metrosexual ads of old, in which his attributes were possibly artificially enhanced, today’s spornosexuals have photoshopped themselves in real life. Think Towie's Dan Osborne in a pair of glittery Speedos (and then have a lie down.)

Glossy magazines cultivated early metrosexuality. Celebrity culture then sent it into orbit. But for today’s generation, social media, selfies and porn are the major vectors of the male desire to be desired. They want to be wanted for their bodies, not their wardrobe. And certainly not their minds.

I suspect Wilde might have approved.


Source: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/fashion-and-style/10881682/The-metrosexual-is-dead.-Long-live-the-spornosexual.html

[ЛыSSый]

classic never dies. This man looking on those boys like on a shit.

http://s55.radikal.ru/i150/1111/15/8796b1196281.jpg

[McCauley]

I hate "metrosexuals" and hipsters with a passion. Usually if I see them when I go to parties around the university nearby, and I'm drunk, I will literally do everything I can to provoke them into fighting me, and they never will. They always find some excuse, and they don't have any sense of personal honor or anything. You can insult them, insult their girl, their mother, and they won't do shit, they'll find a way to back out of it while still seeming "cool". It doesn't matter how "ripped" they are either, they'll still act the same way, a passive-aggressive pussy that will never fight.

Fuck these guys, one day I am gonna kill one of them.

[aimar]

classic never dies. This man looking on those boys like on a shit.

http://s55.radikal.ru/i150/1111/15/8796b1196281.jpg

that's what a man looks like

[ЛыSSый]

I hate "metrosexuals" and hipsters with a passion.

Fuck these guys, one day I am gonna kill one of them. yooo, jesus said "love the others". so, love this shit, cause they has a lot of goods, which will be your, if you want it.

[McCauley]

yooo, jesus said "love the others". so, love this shit, cause they has a lot of goods, which will be your, if you want it.

If you mean after I take their "goods" and rob them after I've beat them unconscious?

I don't care about the women that attach themselves to guys like that, those kinds of girls are worthless except for a one-time fuck.

[ЛыSSый]

If you mean after I take their "goods" and rob them after I've beat them unconscious? beating? mayby. for fun or accnt of words.
god said, moisha wrote:
"You shall not murder"
"You shall not steal"
so be carefull with your strenght and use the power of words, be convincing, he (she) must give "goods" by him(her)self good will. beat only for accent your persuasiveness.

and dont forget the eleven commandment: "dont be a catchen" (or "dont get caught"?).

I don't care about the women that attach themselves to guys like that, those kinds of girls are worthless except for a one-time fuck. repeat at twice, espessialy for you: jesus said "love the others". so, try to love that girls in all wholes at any attempt.

[McCauley]

beating? mayby. for fun or accnt of words.
god said, moisha wrote:
"You shall not murder"
"You shall not steal"
so be carefull with your strenght and use the power of words, be convincing, he (she) must give "goods" by him(her)self good will. beat only for accent your persuasiveness.

and dont forget the eleven commandment: "dont be a catchen" (or "dont get caught"?).
repeat at twice, espessialy for you: jesus said "love the others". so, try to love that girls in all wholes at any attempt.

Yeah man, I understand you are a Christian, so am I. But I think God is more lenient and forgiving than we think. God probably detests hipsters and metrosexuals. Vanity is a sin, and it can lead to far worse. Vanity easily turns into unfounded pride, and then murder and theft can come of that, just like you say.

Also, don't think I forgot how you said you coerced a guy who owed you money by getting his girl to suck your cock. Your record is not exactly clean either.

[Vorpal]

You mean those muscular self-loving faggots? ask sven for more info
no off sven

[ЛыSSый]

I understand you are a Christian ortodox also.

But I think God is more lenient and forgiving than we think. god is fair (justiceful?).

God probably detests hipsters and metrosexuals. no, god also loves them and gives different "goods" to ones for we can get a reason for loving them.
and god loves blessed (crazies? inadequates?).

Vanity is a sin, and it can lead to far worse. you can to stop theirs vanity griefs in a way that i was said.

Also, don't think I forgot how you said you coerced a guy who owed you money by getting his girl to suck your cock. Your record is not exactly clean either.
Ofcause, most of us have a griefs, its inevitable.
In that case was a choice between a adultery greef and greefs of lie, vanity, murder and thiefing. one grief stopped others.

[armenianbodyhair]

I hate "metrosexuals" and hipsters with a passion. Usually if I see them when I go to parties around the university nearby, and I'm drunk, I will literally do everything I can to provoke them into fighting me, and they never will. They always find some excuse, and they don't have any sense of personal honor or anything. You can insult them, insult their girl, their mother, and they won't do shit, they'll find a way to back out of it while still seeming "cool". It doesn't matter how "ripped" they are either, they'll still act the same way, a passive-aggressive pussy that will never fight.

Fuck these guys, one day I am gonna kill one of them.
How is it passive agressive if you're the one provoking them. It seems it would just be passive.

[Kazimiera]

When pornography starts dictating how people should look, we might as well dig a grave and bury entire society.

[War Chef]

I don't understand why women complain when a man over grooms himself, and complain again when he under groom himself and turns into a homeless looking person. I often look at myself in the mirror, yeah, is that a crime? Am I supposed to pretend like I don't have a face?

Does me looking in the mirror mean I'm in love with myself? No, but I have to look professional to be taken seriously in the outside world. This is the only body I get than it's OVER, done, dead, rotten..... So I will do my best to take care of it.

[McCauley]

ortodox also.
god is fair (justiceful?).
no, god also loves them and gives different "goods" to ones for we can get a reason for loving them.
and god loves blessed (crazies? inadequates?).
you can to stop theirs vanity griefs in a way that i was said.

Ofcause, most of us have a griefs, its inevitable.
In that case was a choice between a adultery greef and greefs of lie, vanity, murder and thiefing. one grief stopped others.

I see what you're saying brah, one act of cruelty only leads to more. Someone is wronged and they take out their anger on someone else. Violence begets violence and all that. And one act of kindness stopped a chain of wrongdoing. I appreciate the advice man, I can see you know your shit.

[McCauley]

How is it passive agressive if you're the one provoking them. It seems it would just be passive.

Nah they just always make snarky little comments rather than being upfront. Very ambiguous way of starting shit, it's like they're afraid to start shit, but then they also want to find a way to sneak in an insult.

Sometimes I end up wondering whether I've been insulted or not, whether I should get angry, because I'm not trained in the art of hipster subtlety. These are very indirect, sneaky people and I do not like this.

[zhaoyun]

Great. One more subculture of guys I'd love to punch in their faces, whom I'll be seeing roaming the streets with shit eating smirks on their faces.

[zhaoyun]

Nah they just always make snarky little comments rather than being upfront. Very ambiguous way of starting shit, it's like they're afraid to start shit, but then they also want to find a way to sneak in an insult.

Sometimes I end up wondering whether I've been insulted or not, whether I should get angry, because I'm not trained in the art of hipster subtlety. These are very indirect, sneaky people and I do not like this.

From my experience, Hipster males live in a world where violence is not a possibility. They usually don't know how to react and typically freeze or turn tail, when they are confronted with a situation in which it is.

[Linebacker]

Guess Im one of those guys.(Altho my body looks alot better than the guys in the pics)

I always got along way better with women.Altho I don't have a lot of female friends I haven't slept with,I do have some girls that Im just a friend to.But sooner or later I'll probably go to bed with them too.Always ends up that way.

[Dandelion]

I hate "metrosexuals" and hipsters with a passion. Usually if I see them when I go to parties around the university nearby, and I'm drunk, I will literally do everything I can to provoke them into fighting me, and they never will. They always find some excuse, and they don't have any sense of personal honor or anything. You can insult them, insult their girl, their mother, and they won't do shit, they'll find a way to back out of it while still seeming "cool". It doesn't matter how "ripped" they are either, they'll still act the same way, a passive-aggressive pussy that will never fight.

Fuck these guys, one day I am gonna kill one of them.

This is you


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iduflTRZRcg

[McCauley]

From my experience, Hipster males live in a world where violence is not a possibility. They usually don't know how to react and typically freeze or turn tail, when they are confronted with a situation in which it is.

Yeah man, I remember one time these two pranksters were gonna run up to this other kid (hipster looking dude) and throw water in his face, and then run away, they said "this dudes gonna be so pissed". They did it but waited before running , and instead of the guy getting angry and trying to beat those kids ass, he just whined and said "what the fuuuuuuck what did you do that foooor".

I lol'd

[McCauley]

I don't understand why women complain when a man over grooms himself, and complain again when he under groom himself and turns into a homeless looking person. I often look at myself in the mirror, yeah, is that a crime? Am I supposed to pretend like I don't have a face?

Does me looking in the mirror mean I'm in love with myself? No, but I have to look professional to be taken seriously in the outside world. This is the only body I get than it's OVER, done, dead, rotten..... So I will do my best to take care of it.

Nah man, there's a difference between normal grooming habits and metrosexuals. Do you shave all your body hair, go to tanning salons, wax your eyebrows, go out of your way to be fashionable and trendy?

Every guy looks in the mirror and makes sure his hair looks alright, thats nothing like these sorts of dudes.

[Mortimer]

i dont see anything wrong with them, they take care of their body and looks

[Linebacker]

i dont see anything wrong with them, they take care of their body and looks

You should too.I told you many times I can help you get fit.Nobody but me here can.

You got a Mister Fitness and Martial Artist offering you professional help and you throw it away.

So many people want the chance to work with me and get shredded but don't have it,and Im giving it to you for granted.

You want to fill hot chicks with that BBC of your,you gotta start listening to me.

[Fortis in Arduis]

You should too.I told you many times I can help you get fit.Nobody but me here can.

You got a Mister Fitness and Martial Artist offering you professional help and you throw it away.

So many people want the chance to work with me and get shredded but don't have it,and Im giving it to you for granted.

You want to fill hot chicks with that BBC of your,you gotta start listening to me.

It is wonderful that you want to help, but Big Bruce is stuck in a big rut with very few options. Of course, there are no excuses for not trying...

This is all in the public domain, here, so forgive me Bruce, if it seems mean, but:

Were you aware that Bruce uses crutches and a respirator? What about the diabetes and the stultifying anti-psychotic medication which exacerbates that and the obesity, and which causes schizo-mimetic symptoms when in withdrawal? Very difficult situation here.

Of course, a diet and exercise overhaul would be ideal, but I suspect that there are multiple factors that would make it very hard to him to make even the smallest changes.

Bruce is stuck between a rock and a hard place. I would say start with diet, cut nearly all carbohydrates and try to reverse the diabetes, then after some weight has come off, start with swimming and see what comes, but it is so easy for me to say that, and (for some reason that we are not sure about yet) so hard for him to do.

[Linebacker]

It is wonderful that you want to help, but Big Bruce is stuck in a big rut with very few options. Of course, there are no excuses for not trying...

This is all in the public domain, here, so forgive me Bruce, if it seems mean, but:

CUT.

I know his exact state.And I've been in fitness long enough to not diagnose him as a lost cause.You probably have seen videos of people even fatter than him and in wheechairs,that start to work out and become fit and do backflips.

What the biggest problem here will be is getting him to work out,because he is mentally broke and has labled himself as a lost cause,and that will be hard to reverse.

It's not impossible for him to get fit.Difference is unlike the guys that I work with who are usually not out of shape when they come asking me for advice,He will have to start from rock bottom,from the most basic stuff and climb up the ladder.

I can tell him right away it will be a slow and painful journey,he will cry,he will start to doubt if it's worth it,he's going to want to give up.But in the long run it will get him where he wants to be.He WILL be fit.

[Fortis in Arduis]

I know his exact state.And I've been in fitness long enough to not diagnose him as a lost cause.You probably have seen videos of people even fatter than him and in wheechairs,that start to work out and become fit and do backflips.

What the biggest problem here will be is getting him to work out,because he is mentally broke and has labled himself as a lost cause,and that will be hard to reverse.

It's not impossible for him to get fit.Difference is unlike the guys that I work with who are usually not out of shape when they come asking me for advice,He will have to start from rock bottom,from the most basic stuff and climb up the ladder.

I can tell him right away it will be a slow and painful journey,he will cry,he will start to doubt if it's worth it,he's going to want to give up.But in the long run it will get him where he wants to be.He WILL be fit.

I think that a long stay in a spa would be a good move, just to change the diet around, if nothing else.

But, right: I met people from Europe, in India, who were doing it. I also met a large Indian girl who had come in a wheelchair, and on New Year's Eve, she was able to jump into the air.

Fuck it, I stayed here: http://www.ayurvedagram.com/ayurvedagram.asp

I would do it every year if I could afford it, just for general detoxification.

There were exercise classes, and opportunities for walks and a small gymnasium, and two treatments a day, but some people had more than that. Amazing stuff.

I stayed in another spa in the Lower Himalayas another year, which was more basic and not luxurious, but the environment, the views, the climate, the altitude and everything else, were just wonderful, and many good things happened for me after that.

[Linebacker]

Spa and relaxing is not what he needs fortis.

He needs heavy cardiovascular training,extreme saunas and then icebaths.

If he could only come to my fightcamp I'll have him in shape for less than an year.
I already see the program for him.I'll start him up with lots of jogging and pushups for a month until he gets onto rhythm.

Then when he starts to buzz I move him to swimming and crossfit.And then in the end I'll get him on the weights.

[armenianbodyhair]

You want to fill hot chicks with that BBC of your,you gotta start listening to me.

LMAO.

[Vorpal]

I hate "metrosexuals" and hipsters with a passion. Usually if I see them when I go to parties around the university nearby, and I'm drunk, I will literally do everything I can to provoke them into fighting me, and they never will. They always find some excuse, and they don't have any sense of personal honor or anything. You can insult them, insult their girl, their mother, and they won't do shit, they'll find a way to back out of it while still seeming "cool". It doesn't matter how "ripped" they are either, they'll still act the same way, a passive-aggressive pussy that will never fight.

Fuck these guys, one day I am gonna kill one of them.

sounds like you are a really stupid fuck

why dont you try to play with any of your local blokes, instead of picking people who are very unlikely to respond in an aggresive way?

[RussiaPrussia]

women should like men how they are like we do with women, we dont have any classification for women like they do with us

[McCauley]

sounds like you are a really stupid fuck

why dont you try to play with any of your local blokes, instead of picking people who are very unlikely to respond in an aggresive way?

Why should I pick on "my local blokes"? I like my "local blokes", and if I tried to start shit with "my local blokes" they would respond and beat my ass.

These guys have the ego and the vanity, but not the courage to back it up. If you are going to be arrogant and condescending, you should at least be willing to back it up with more than just words. Nam sayin bro?

[Melina]

I don't understand why women complain when a man over grooms himself, and complain again when he under groom himself and turns into a homeless looking person. I often look at myself in the mirror, yeah, is that a crime? Am I supposed to pretend like I don't have a face?

Does me looking in the mirror mean I'm in love with myself? No, but I have to look professional to be taken seriously in the outside world. This is the only body I get than it's OVER, done, dead, rotten..... So I will do my best to take care of it.

There should be a middle ground. I like men that take care of their personal hygiene and don't have ripped pants. When a guy starts plucking his eyebrows however that is when he is going over board. The only one supposed to pluck their eyebrows is me. :laugh:

I also don't like a guy dying his hair. Only females should do that. Uhhh... And let me not get started with men doing manicure at the hair salon. I think they are more afraid of breaking their nails than I am.

[Vorpal]

90% of my neighbours will beat the shit out of you just because you looked them in the eyes for too long
its not a really wise idea to make fun of people in the place where I live, srsly

you would like it tho - not many hipsters around

[Vorpal]

There should be a middle ground. I like men that take care of their personal hygiene and don't have ripped pants. When a guy starts plucking his eyebrows however that is when he is going over board. The only one supposed to pluck their eyebrows is me. :laugh:

I also don't like a guy dying his hair. Only females should do that. Uhhh... And let me not get started with men doing manicure at the hair salon. I think they are more afraid of breaking their nails than I am.

so if some guy has a unibrow he should leave it the way it is? oookay

[Melina]

so if some guy has a unibrow he should leave it the way it is? oookay

Well in that case they may I am talking about guys that have thinner eyebrows than me and do the duck lips.....Gosh there are so many metro hipsters around here...

[Vorpal]

Well in that case they may I am talking about guys that have thinner eyebrows than me and do the duck lips.....Gosh there are so many metro hipsters around here...

a metro hipster just because I asked you a question? are you feeling okay today, sure?

[Melina]

a metro hipster just because I asked you a question? are you feeling okay today, sure?

Didn't mean you. Was talking about where I live..

[Vorpal]

well, in the place I live 90% of young people are aggresive blokes looking for a fight, I am not sure which one is worse - hipster cunt or a crazed monkey.

[LightHouse89]

those are not men.......this is a man. https://www.google.com/search?q=clint+eastwood&biw=1920&bih=963&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=LMaYU5ebGpeyyATWvYAQ&sqi=2&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAQ#facrc=_&imgdii=_&imgrc=OARPuiHA0HyHAM%253A%3BmFHuuo19EOTqcM%3Bhttp% 253A%252F%252Fwww.stars-portraits.com%252Fimg%252Fportraits%252Fstars%252F c%252Fclint-eastwood%252Fclint-eastwood-2-by-Petrol%255B232291%255D.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fww w.stars-portraits.com%252Fen%252Fportrait-232291.html%3B600%3B428

[LightHouse89]

well, in the place I live 90% of young people are aggresive blokes looking for a fight, I am not sure which one is worse - hipster cunt or a crazed monkey.

fuck both of them up :thumb001: I prefer my country looks. I think metro men are gay. Domesticated males are a joke and wouldn't last five days out in the wild.

[LightHouse89]

There should be a middle ground. I like men that take care of their personal hygiene and don't have ripped pants. When a guy starts plucking his eyebrows however that is when he is going over board. The only one supposed to pluck their eyebrows is me. :laugh:

I also don't like a guy dying his hair. Only females should do that. Uhhh... And let me not get started with men doing manicure at the hair salon. I think they are more afraid of breaking their nails than I am.

your a womanly woman :thumb001: hopefully alittle tom boyish.....I like women who are not afraid of getting dirty :p

[Melina]

those are not men.......this is a man. https://www.google.com/search?q=clint+eastwood&biw=1920&bih=963&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=LMaYU5ebGpeyyATWvYAQ&sqi=2&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAQ#facrc=_&imgdii=_&imgrc=OARPuiHA0HyHAM%253A%3BmFHuuo19EOTqcM%3Bhttp% 253A%252F%252Fwww.stars-portraits.com%252Fimg%252Fportraits%252Fstars%252F c%252Fclint-eastwood%252Fclint-eastwood-2-by-Petrol%255B232291%255D.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fww w.stars-portraits.com%252Fen%252Fportrait-232291.html%3B600%3B428

Yeah men of the 50's were pretty hot. I should have been born around that era.

[Vorpal]

eastwood mesculine looking? ehm. well, he is skinny as fuck and looks like a walking corpse
he looks dangerous cuz he is making his angry face all the time


and this guy looks like a total sissy
http://collider.com/wp-content/uploads/scott-eastwood-image.jpg

[Minesweeper]

The crisis of masculinity deepens. It's interesting how men are being exploited more and more as sexual object, which was a female role in the past and was used as a main argument in feminist critic of modern society. I think they will soon have to give up on that one as position of men and women is equalizing in that aspect.

[Melina]

At this era he is. He hasn't put botox on that I am aware of. His frame is a little small but there are some things that are out of a guys control. Today we have beiver and the guy from maroon five.