Sexual lifestyles?

[Lutiferre]

So what are your sexual lifestyles?

Monogamy - one partner only for all of life?

Serial monogamy - one partner only, for limited periods? How limited? Extremely short relationships, which are mostly sexual? Or longer relationships?

Polygamy - several partners for all life?

Serial polygamy - several different partners for several different periods?

Pure promiscuity/libertinism - no permanent limits, just whatever you feel like?

What are the benefits/disadvantages of these different styles? Why choose one over the other?

Do you even question how you live? Why not?

[poiuytrewq0987]

Monogamy - one partner only for all of life?

This is highly improbable in today's world. Are you gonna stay with that girl who you dated in high school for the rest of your life? Not gonna happen aside exceptions.

[Eldritch]

So what are your sexual lifestyles?

Monogamy - one partner only for all of life?

Serial monogamy - one partner only, for limited periods? How limited? Extremely short relationships, which are mostly sexual? Or longer relationships?

Polygamy - several partners for all life?

Serial polygamy - several different partners for several different periods?

Pure promiscuity/libertinism - no permanent limits, just whatever you feel like?

What are the benefits/disadvantages of these different styles? Why choose one over the other?

Do you even question how you live? Why not?

Most of my life I've been wading in a Bermuda Triangle with promiscuity in one corner, and serial monogamy and actual monogamy in the others.

[Bard]

My hand.

[Absinthe]

I'm a serial monogamist still searching for the right companion.
Never was a fun of so called "casual", "open" relationships, but I somehow often end up in such ones (due to the phobias that men have about monogamy and long term commitment). :shrug:

[Monolith]

What about you, Lutiferre?

[Absinthe]

What about you, Lutiferre?

Agamy is not on the list :D

[Svanhild]

So what are your sexual lifestyles?

A combination. One real close partner and several others for some interesting hours. You could call me a monogamist with polygamous lapses.

[Loki]

Monogamy is my goal. Serial monogamy is a means of getting there; perhaps even promiscuity.



Do you even question how you live?


No.



Why not?

Because I listen to my conscience. I trust it.

[Vulpix]

A combination. One real close partner and several others for some interesting hours. You could call me a monogamist with polygamous lapses.

Arguably the healthiest arrangement: it fulfills the need for closeness - (nearly?) everyone's need - which is hard enough to achieve with a single person, while not entailing the often jeopardizing sense of claustrophobia and restriction of personal freedom that strict monogamy brings, in addition to minimizing the risk of said relationship falling into boring routine.

[Arne]

Promiscuity is superior if People use Condoms.
The Humans are still not far away from their instincts and it even includes many Sex partners..
Life is too short for only one Partner.
Have Fun if you´re Healthy enough :D


Monogamy is mostly based on christianity and especially Women are very related to this ancient Usage.

[The Khagan]

*ahem*

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Descent_from_Genghis_Khan

I could be your daddy.




Monogamy is mostly based on christianity and especially Women are very related to this ancient Usage.

Untrue, ancient Germanic tribes also valued monogamy as an ideal as stated by Tacitus in Germania.

[Arne]

*ahem*

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Descent_from_Genghis_Khan

I could be your daddy.



Untrue, ancient Germanic tribes also valued monogamy as an ideal as stated by Tacitus in Germania.

Not really as spoken for People of this local area they had the Possibility to choose for one of many Blonde types.
That´s why we have so many Blonde Types here..... :D
One man with many Women :embarrassed
And what ever that means ..

[Lutiferre]

Agamy is not on the list :D
Well, I am pretty much living in my girlfriends apartment, so "agamy" hardly describes it.


Monogamy is my goal. Serial monogamy is a means of getting there; perhaps even promiscuity.
Why is it your goal? It's hardly a new goal.


Because I listen to my conscience. I trust it.
Yes, but even the conscience can be in conflict with itself sometimes.

[Loki]

Why is it your goal? It's hardly a new goal.


Does a goal have to be new? :) Sometimes, old wisdom is best.



Yes, but even the conscience can be in conflict with itself sometimes.

Hence, internal struggles we all face. The most important thought here is to be in touch with yourself.


Well, I am pretty much living in my girlfriends apartment, so "agamy" hardly describes it.


That's cool! :thumb001:

[Lutiferre]

Does a goal have to be new? :) Sometimes, old wisdom is best.
Not at all. But sometimes setting a new goal which is your own might be of higher value.


Hence, internal struggles we all face. The most important thought here is to be in touch with yourself.

Indeed. But the problem is also that your conscience may be simply an instrument of the will of others; it may be feeding you the -arbitrary, not necessarily useful- moral values of your society and family and everyone's will but your own. Conscience has no intrinsic value, it only has so if it is truly your own conscience.

[Loki]

Not at all. But sometimes setting a new goal which is your own might be of higher value.


The eventual striving towards monogamy is my ultimate goal; a personal choice. At the same time I recognise the fact that it is a journey getting there.

Let me say that all of us have unique paths and unique experiences. We won't all follow the same routes to get to where we want to be. Why not? Because life is not so easy. There are hurdles to be overcome at every point. Some hurdles are overcome quickly, while others take years ... and yes, even decades.



Indeed. But the problem is also that your conscience may be simply an instrument of the will of others; it may be feeding you the -arbitrary, not necessarily useful- moral values of your society and family and everyone's will but your own. Conscience has no intrinsic value, it only has so if it is truly your own conscience.

True ... especially with regards to religious thinking. One can adjust your own conscience at will, I say. To the point where only you know what is right for you, and what is not. Set your own boundaries. Nothing else and nobody else matters.

[Monolith]

I strive to be (happily) married some day, and to raise my children in a healthy environment, so that they can do the same one day. So I guess one could say that I'm monogamous, though I echo Loki by saying that serial monogamy (i.e. serious commitments through time) leads to monogamy.

Consequently, I see no problem with sex being practised in loving and caring relationships. However, I consider modern attitude about sex as a kind of sport a product of modern degeneracy. What once had deep emotional and spiritual value has now become a pale shadow of its former self.

[Lulletje Rozewater]

Pure promiscuity/libertinism - no permanent limits, just whatever you feel like?

I am like a frog :"One jump and she croaks"


What are the benefits/disadvantages of these different styles? Why choose one over the other?
It is beneficial to learn as many styles as possible.
The disadvantage is: Your wallet becomes a slush fund


Do you even question how you live? Why not?

Never,because God loves sluts:tongue

[Tabiti]

Have been only with one sexual partner in my life. Why? Because it happened like that. I'm too picky when it comes for men (or maybe men don't like me enough, who knows;)).
Polygamy or monogamy - choice depends on personal views and culture.

[Skandi]

Me? polygamy sometimes monogamous depends on the circumstances. certainly not one for life..not looking for that really, can't see how it would ever work.
I am what I am and I just go with whatever feels right at the time.
Do I question it. No why should I?

[Lutiferre]

I tend toward the view that polygamy is acceptable for men, but would be malplaced for women.

More specifically, because in the case of marriage, it has always been a matter of the legal registration or acquisition of property, the property of wives and children respectively. A woman cannot own a man, like a dog can't own a human.

[Tabiti]

I tend toward the view that polygamy is acceptable for men, but would be malplaced for women.

More specifically, because in the case of marriage, it has always been a matter of the legal registration or acquisition of property, the property of wives and children respectively. A woman cannot own a man, like a dog can't own a human.
According to the christian and islamic point of view;)
There are still polyandric societies in some parts of Asia.

[Lutiferre]

According to the christian and islamic point of view;)
There are still polyandric societies in some parts of Asia.
It has also been the point of view of heathen Greeks and Germans.

Besides, it only applies to the majority of women, not to every single one. There are exceptions.

[Arrow Cross]

I tend toward the view that polygamy is acceptable for men, but would be malplaced for women.

More specifically, because in the case of marriage, it has always been a matter of the legal registration or acquisition of property, the property of wives and children respectively. A woman cannot own a man, like a dog can't own a human.
That is anything but a Christian point of view.

[SuuT]

Monogamy is a practise; Polygamy appears to be more of an organic outgrowth of will and energy.

People tend to put Monogamy on a pedestal, but it certainly wouldn't be the first time weakness was re-packaged as virtue.

[Svanhild]

A woman cannot own a man, like a dog can't own a human.
:pound: Welcome to 15th century. In a working, desirable relationship nobody owns anyone. But men or women can be clingy like a dog, there's no gender difference. Some don't or can't understand the meaning of "It's over".

[SuuT]

In a working, desirable relationship nobody owns anyone.

Couples own one another in more ways than one.

[Lutiferre]

:pound: Welcome to 15th century. In a working, desirable relationship nobody owns anyone. But men or women can be clingy like a dog, there's no gender difference. Some don't or can't understand the meaning of "It's over".
I was speaking of the institution of marriage and it's meaning and role throughout societies where it is alive.

That institution has practically been dissolved today, so I make no illusions about it.

[Sadie]

Luti has some kind of hermaphrodite in his avatar. Does it indicate his own sexual preferences or models? *yuck*

[Lutiferre]

Luti has some kind of hermaphrodite in his avatar. Does it indicate his own sexual preferences or models? *yuck*
This little girl is waiting for you to kiss her
http://www.gilliomville.org/VideoSynopses/images/doors06.jpg

[antonio]

I was speaking of the institution of marriage and it's meaning and role throughout societies where it is alive.

That institution has practically been dissolved today, so I make no illusions about it.

Another hipocresy of modern times. For example in Spain many youth couples want the institution to be dissolved, at least till one dies and it's time to ask Gov for widowness subsidies, then, magically, the obsolete institution comes to a new life, to the point to try to sack the rest of us. I.E. a year ago, ten firemen died in a burning forest, leaving nine widows and a woman, which, after four years and a son of relation with a constantly endangered worker, was "modern and progressive" enough to never surrender to an obsolete, medieval institution called marriage. But, of course, she now wants society treat her as if it was the opposite case.:confused:

[Radojica]

But, of course, she now wants society treat her as if it was the opposite case.:confused:

Here in Serbia "unofficial" couples who did not get married, but who live together, after 6 months (or is it a year?) they have every rights as the couple who is married. Isnt that the case in Spain too? (Or I didnt understand you well:confused:)









:embarrassed

[Liffrea]

Hmmm

Can’t imagine me playing the married, kids, mortgage game….I’m to self centred/interested for anything like that. I’m more likely to go with the flow, if I’m interested I’ll strike but I’m not that interested in “settling down”, I’m to much of a cynic to believe in “soul mates” and the like. Ironically I’ve probably attracted more female attention through my general disinterest than I probably would have, being an average looking man, going out of my way to date women. I don’t consider myself in the game and I don’t usually spend much time thinking about it, now and again I wonder but not usually for long.

[Allenson]

Monogamist by virtue of being attached but certainly, when left up to my own devices, I tend toward hoeing around a bit.

http://gallandt.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/img_02892.jpg

[lei.talk]

Polygamy (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polygamy#Forms_of_polygamy) or monogamy (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monogamy_in_Christianity) - choice depends on personal views and culture.many persons avoid marriage
because so many of those unions fail (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Divorce) and the resultant (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_support) complications (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alimony_in_Judaism)

others avoid marriage (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marriage) because they discovered
that some marriages last a life-time (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Life_imprisonment).


http://i34.tinypic.com/20ix9g2.png (http://forums.skadi.net/showthread.php?p=843627#post843627)
http://www.theapricity.com/forum/image.php?u=684&dateline=1255486727 (http://www.theapricity.com/forum/showthread.php?t=9447)

[antonio]

Here in Serbia "unofficial" couples who did not get married, but who live together, after 6 months (or is it a year?) they have every rights as the couple who is married. Isnt that the case in Spain too? (Or I didnt understand you well:confused:)
:embarrassed

Of course they do. Id blame on Germany, France and Nordic countries. Our underdeveloped politicians and public servants are stupid enough to blindly follow their erratic ways as if they were the word of God.

Ps. I feel sorry for Serbia, it used to be a serious country not so long ago...maybe it's a sort of race for being accepted for Brussels sick and moron sprouts.

[Cato]

Monogamy.

[Atlas]

So far serial monogamy... only one after another, couldn't go after two chicks or more at a time (unless I get married for the rest of my life).

[anonymaus]

What about qtpigamy? I'll fondle anything if it's cute enough.

My ideal partner is a beautiful woman with a penis--and a vagina for a mouth. In fact, if we could replace a woman's mouth with a vagina, the world would be a better place.

BRB, I think I just invented oral sex.

[Óttar]

Luti has some kind of hermaphrodite in his avatar. Does it indicate his own sexual preferences or models? *yuck*
Jim Morrison, a hermaphrodite!? HA! :rolleyes:

I think for right now, seeing as I'm young, I just figure that when I get lucky I will just see people and then let them do what they like. What they do when I'm not around doesn't concern me, as long as they're not out collecting any diseases. If they have other lovers, I don't really want to know about it, but if they go both ways then maybe I can have two (or more) girlfriends. :D

I am curious about polygyny and I think if polygamy were legal, it should go both ways.

Ultimately I want an intense monogamous relationship that becomes comfortable and stable, maybe if she's adventurous, we could put our strengths together and let other women in to varying degrees. :p

[Heimmacht]

I think that the most beautiful thing in life is to find that one person you really connect with, and being faithful is the best way to show your love methinks.

Not that I would want it any other way, if I'm in love with someone I desire nobody else but that one person.

[SwordoftheVistula]

:pound: Welcome to 15th century. In a working, desirable relationship nobody owns anyone.

The last recorded 'wife sale' in England was in 1913 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wife_selling#cite_note-inflation-UK-29), for £1 (equal to £70 today).

Act fast before the Euro devalues!

[Lulletje Rozewater]

I think that the most beautiful thing in life is to find that one person you really connect with, and being faithful is the best way to show your love methinks.

Not that I would want it any other way, if I'm in love with someone I desire nobody else but that one person.

Monogamy South African style---poor male:D


1: Before Marriage (good)


http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_t3_fMo06ljA/RxSsmZGNLeI/AAAAAAAAAno/4J-a8a1lmEo/s320/Picture1.jpg



2: After Marriage(bad)


http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_t3_fMo06ljA/RxSsMZGNLdI/AAAAAAAAAng/J-NT0ocWvGM/s320/Picture2.jpg



3: After divorce(door-mat)

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_t3_fMo06ljA/RxSr6ZGNLcI/AAAAAAAAAnY/y4gFVesA7ZQ/s320/Picture3.jpg

[poiuytrewq0987]

I think that the most beautiful thing in life is to find that one person you really connect with, and being faithful is the best way to show your love methinks.

Not that I would want it any other way, if I'm in love with someone I desire nobody else but that one person.

I agree, monogamy is what I seek.

[Tony]

That is anything but a Christian point of view.

That comes out of antrhopological roots , the number of polygamous societies vastly outnumbers those polyandrous , a man can technically impregnate severl women per day , a woman can get pregrant and deliver a baby only once every 9 months.
Women work on one man at time , underline the quality over the quantity , men work the other way around , from an insticntual point of view.
This pattern is also confirmed by the sexual reproductive system , men reproduce by producing millions of spermatozoons , women by producing just one gigantic ovule , i.e. by concentring energy on quality.
These different reproductive patterns are mirrored by different mating patterns with males being prone to promiscuity and females to monogamy.

[Murphy]

Consequently, I see no problem with sex being practised in loving and caring relationships.

The word of God and Church should be enough.

[Liffrea]

http://i285.photobucket.com/albums/ll54/Liffrea66/celtcpl2.gif

You know when ever I think marriage would not be so bad......I look at this picture of some poor bastard driven to fight the Romans just to get away from his nagging wife. He looks like he's getting a right ear full:D

[Monolith]

The word of God and Church should be enough.
Yeah, I guess I could be considered a heretic in that aspect. Do note that I'm not talking about promiscuity here, but about long lasting relationships that eventually lead to marriage.

[Tolleson]

The word of God and Church should be enough.

Maybe for some of the flock! :rolleyes:

[Monolith]

Maybe for some of the flock! :rolleyes:
A more appropriate word would be 'community'.

[Lulletje Rozewater]

A more appropriate word would be 'community'.

Or the Dutch style L.A.T.

[Svarog]

But, it's just sex? I am not being all that serious about it.

[Piparskeggr]

If I may?

One could suppose that I am a serial monogamist; having had one heterosexual pairing at a time.

However, I was a virgin (as was my [now] wife) until we bonded during college.

I had a few girlfriends before Anita, but she is the only person with whom I have ever been physically intimate.

When a nicely put together woman of my acquaintance" put the moves on me," awhile ago, I demurred.

My rejoinder is (then and always) that while I love all women, I am in love with, and make love to, only one.

The example I have from my family is that one finds a "soul-mate," and that is the ONE to whom you bond - to the exclusion of any other.

I think it works, and I do not believe I have lost anything thereby...

[The Khagan]

Monogamy works for some people, and for some others it doesn't. Simple as that.

Of course, there are gray areas in between and such, as is with all things usually.

Monogamy? Eh, I value the ideal of monogamy, but it's hard to not be so embittered and cynical about actually finding someone I could actually see myself with forever. I tire easily, when things get too predictable, I get wary. And vice versa on the girls end. I'm sure there were a few that tired of me easily :)

Not to mention my ridiculously high standards for em. Not superficially, that is, I'm really stringent and picky about personality, intellect, moral ground etc etc. At 19 it's pretty hard to find what you want, or for that matter KNOW what you want in the first place. But, it seems that the confusion continues from what I hear.

Who knows, we'll see. This ripe old age of 19 isn't exactly what one would call a wise age in this matter. For now, I'm happy with fooling around with a couple girls here and there. But, I fall very well short of a libertine or of even borderline promiscuity.

[Loki]

There are lots of special people around who would make ideal partners as a monogamous couple. Actually meeting that special person is not so easy ... but one has a lifetime to find him/her. :)

Has anyone mentioned love in this thread yet? I believe in love. I believe if you truly love someone you would not want to be with anyone else ...

[Murphy]

Yeah, I guess I could be considered a heretic in that aspect.

Yes. You're just lucky you're not an ethnically Jewish, former Muslim who recently converted to Catholicism living in Madrid, because you would be so fucked otherwise :p.


Do note that I'm not talking about promiscuity here, but about long lasting relationships that eventually lead to marriage.

It doesn't matter. Sex outside of marriage is a mortal sin. Whether it's with one person or one thousand.

[Piparskeggr]

-snip-
Has anyone mentioned love in this thread yet? I believe in love. I believe if you truly love someone you would not want to be with anyone else ...

I'll bite. :thumb001: but there isn't a short answer :D

I first saw Anita just after lunch on 29 August 1977. We were both students at the military college in Vermont, USA.

I was a junior, the regimental medical sergeant...part of the cadet corps. Anita was a freshman, also in the corps.

It was the first day of "Rook Week," where the freshmen would receive the basics of military training to start them off before the rest of the student body arrived for classes.

As med sgt, I ran sick call at the infirmary, but was not to be directly involved with the freshmen or their training; wasn't even supposed to talk to them outside of official duties until they completed training, sometime in November.

My clerk and I were watching the "Rooks" march single file up the hill from the dining hall to their barracks area. The training cadre lining the path, yelling (of course) [it's really funny, then and now, to hear a 5' 2" sophomore corporal call a 6' freshman "Young Man!"], pulling rooks out of line and quizzing them on cadet lore, correcting uniform infractions and the like...typical break 'em down and build 'em up military training.

Well, John and I were scoping out the new female cadets, typical 20 year old comments flying between us on their obvious physical charms, or lack thereof.

Then Anita comes marching up the hill, expression like she had just bit the finger off some cadet corporal or sergeant and was waiting for someone else to pull her out of line so she could spit it in his (or her) face.

I turned to John, speechless for a moment..."John, that's the one I'm going to marry," as my finger followed her path.

She came to sick call for the first time later in the week and we struck up an acquaintance. She dated a couple of other guys before me, but I was willing to accept that, as she was happy. I offered friendship, which was accepted.

Finally, she said yes to me, oh, what a life changing moment. I still feel a tightness in my chest when I relive the memory.

Love, that's IS the key for me. I was smitten for Anita and continue to be.

I don't step outside the boundary of our relationship because I've never loved anyone like I do her.

The only times in my life I've ever been truly frightened are when I thought her life might be in danger (several cancer scares and one really bad infection from an abscessed ovarian cyst), not even the time when I was being shot at.

I can imagine life without her, but not willingly, and it has always been her choice. I love her enough to let her go, if that is what it would take to make her happy.

Luckily, I've been doing a good job of being what she needs since 2 February 1978. Our friends were surprised that we had not married during the summer before returning for the next school year.

[Lutiferre]

(I quote Loki's post, but this post is directed just as much to others, including the above poster)
I believe if you truly love someone you would not want to be with anyone else ...
Though why does love have to have "truth value"? To judge peoples loves as false love, true love, etc. Isn't love just a passion, and like all passions, can be betrayed by some other passion if it has sufficient strength? Nothing has infinite strength, and so can always be surpassed eventually by something external to it. The same is true with love - any love which is human, and not static.

Making love and sex exclusively bound together or even "ideally identical" in the first place seems a narrowing-down both of love and sexuality; and perhaps a confusion between them, no doubt made easier by the intensity of sexual experiences but still not justified by it; because there can be a love relationship which co-exists without sexual exclusivity.

And "love's" perpetuation or exclusivity may also not come out of the strength or "truth" of the love, but from the weakness and cowardice of the individual, which leads him to seek the security and (potentially) despicable comfort of "one safe relationship" to cling onto.

I know there are people who love each other, but do not live in a strict, or even at all monogamous relationship together.

Perhaps translating "love" into an exclusive, constant and maybe even permanent relationship, is a misunderstanding. A misunderstanding of love as a passion; turning a passion into some destiny and substantiality which it never was supposed to hold in the first place.

Whereas other factors and passions, like power and indeed possession itself, seem more capable of and appropriate as a sentiment with which to take another person into possession, because that is also what monogamous love does. Or at least tries to, even though monogamous "love" might hide the underlying power exchange involved behind the romantic veil of warm feelings. A veil which, if taken too seriously, might lead to unrealistic expections which then break the relatonship - as often happens, considering modern divorce rates and serial monogamy tendencies.

[anonymaus]

Though why does love have to have "truth value"?

Not to give your verbosity short shrift, but: love is our emotional reaction to the values and virtue we perceive in our self and in others. Sex can be an inimitable way of sharing the mutually incommunicable things two (or more--I suppose) people feel for each other, but it isn't restricted to that by any means.

[SuuT]

... love is our emotional reaction to the values and virtue we perceive in our self and in others.

:confused2: Therefore, he who loves himself the most will love others the most?

Something seems off in the premise.

[anonymaus]

:confused2: Therefore, he who loves himself the most will love others the most?

Something seems off in the premise.

In the sense that love begins with the self, you are on the right track; but you drew a conclusion which I didn't think I allowed for. It would be true that a person who is worthy of love, and does love himself, is capable of loving others who deserve it. The typical self-abasing self-loathing altruists are capable only of being slaves to others: they don't recognize virtue in others because they have little of it themselves.

It's extraordinarily difficult to be both succinct and imperviously broad on such complex subjects.

[Lutiferre]

Not to give your verbosity short shrift, but: love is our emotional reaction to the values and virtue we perceive in our self and in others. Sex can be an inimitable way of sharing the mutually incommunicable things two (or more--I suppose) people feel for each other, but it isn't restricted to that by any means.

Of course. Sex can be many things. By virtue of its emotional and physical intensity, it can indeed be very fitting for expressing intimacy. But it can also express something very different, violent aggressivity.

[SuuT]

In the sense that love begins with the self, you are on the right track; but you drew a conclusion which I didn't think I allowed for.

It was a very broad premise:D. I was/am curious about how you would make qualitative and/or quantitative lucubrations.


It would be true that a person who is worthy of love, and does love himself, is capable of loving others who deserve it. The typical self-abasing self-loathing altruists are capable only of being slaves to others: they don't recognize virtue in others because they have little of it themselves.

If I may, is this Love (the love of the altruist), to you, qualitatively different than the 'virtuous' man's love, or a difference of amount?

[SuuT]

Of course. Sex can be many things. By virtue of its emotional and physical intensity, it can indeed be very fitting for expressing intimacy. But it can also express something very different, violent aggressivity.

Is there no intimacy in violent aggresivity?

I should think so, given that the sex act can range from tenderness to violence even amongst those that love one another dearly.

[anonymaus]

It was a very broad premise:D. I was/am curious about how you would make qualitative and/or quantitative lucubrations.

If I may, is this Love (the love of the altruist), to you, qualitatively different than the 'virtuous' man's love, or a difference of amount?

Nothing so in depth or purposeful is needed, as we receive data in the relevant areas--learning a person's ethics, for example, or seeing how they allow themselves to be treated or how they treat others-it is processed by our subconscious within the context we've created for it: our worldview. Rational people have a worldview which allows the easy incorporation of these data and, unless their view is askew, the emotional response ought to be typical.

It is true that irrational people would follow somewhat a similar process, but the emotional response would be out of whack as a result of their thinking being chaotic and unstable. They don't possess a worldview so much as a dog's breakfast--a messy collection of experiences with no rational or even slightly considered theme to tie it together. The problem arises in their case from confusing emotions, which are a barometer of our thoughts (and received data), with the thoughts and data themselves.

Using the example of an altruist, they would indeed have a qualitatively different "love" from a rational egoist: they would feel companionship and affection for the similarly slavish. They do not strive to be worthy of love, which is to say they barely have an identifiable "self" and thus no self-esteem, and so cannot recognize what is virtuous in others.

You surely now see what I said about garrulousness.:embarrassed

[SuuT]

You surely now see what I said about garrulousness.:embarrassed

lol :D Stop with the modesty. It's disgusting. :D

[Lutiferre]

Is there no intimacy in violent aggresivity?
There can be. But I don't think it has to be. Rape, seen as a sexual expression, is hardly what I associate with "intimacy".

[Piparskeggr]

Hey all;

A very interesting thread.

Sex is, simply, are you male, or are you female... ;)

Love is, never simple... :confused:

Emotions are, as I feel them, directed reactions (which are sometimes difficult to articulate) to observations and stimuli... :coffee:

All of which add up to our quality of being human.

"Having sex" ???

I would suppose that this is bound up in many peoples' minds as having to do with a physical act, which provides some ease to a heightened sense of physiological stimulus...

For me, the physical is inexorably bound up with the psychic...

"Having sex" with someone, with whom I have no emotional bond is tantamount to using a self-heating "blow-up" doll for masturbation in my mind. Neither party is invested in the full measure of contentment of the other, seeking only personal "release."

For me, the physical pairing can not truly exist without the psychic pairing.

Before Anita, there was only one other for whom I felt as strongly as she. It worked out that Jill and I "grew" apart, taking different "paths" in life. (Ironically, Jill became really good friends with my mother-in-law many years later.)

Cynthia, Penny, Linda, Robin, Susan, Heidi...frankly, they would have been merely "fuck toys" if we had come together...

I prefer more than that.

[Germanicus]

Monogamy is my goal. Serial monogamy is a means of getting there; perhaps even promiscuity

I freely admit when my marriage of 26 years ended i attacked sexual promiscuity with impunity and non guilt. Then found completely without looking my partner for life....:)

[Lulletje Rozewater]

The greek have a few words meaning love(ask a Greek)
Altruism is not inherent in man/woman
LOVE(to me) consist of two parts.
1.IN LOVE:sexual satisfaction-conquering-macho,but being in love means also falling out of love.

2.LOVE: Is like a golf ball at the golf course No matter how much you hit the ball from 1 to 18 the golf ball does not crack. IE No matter how many problems you encounter you always overcome it.
This type of love is once in a blue moon.
The ball most of the time cracks,when that happens,get out and start afresh.

[Sadie]

Lutiferre must have some serious problems when he is so obsessed with constantly writing about sex, sexual life-styles, sexual this, sexual that etc.

[Lutiferre]

Lutiferre must have some serious problems when he is so obsessed with constantly writing about sex, sexual life-styles, sexual this, sexual that etc.
If being obsessed with sex is having "serious problems", then humanity has always had some serious problems. Yet it is this "problem" that has ensured our survival and expansion.

But I don't deny I am obsessed with sex, at least to some degree - I see it as only a sign of vitality and youth.

[Sadie]

Being obsessed with sex is having "serious problems".

But I don't deny I am obsessed with sex, at least to some degree - I see it as only a sign of frustration.

fixed

[Lutiferre]

fixed
Well, I am 18 and I have a girlfriend. I am not frustrated.

But the thing that's so good about the human sex drive is that it doesn't go away, even if you don't frustrate it, except if you have bad health. That's the only way conception is realistically possible - you must be obsessed with sex for at least a month of heavy duty work.

[Sadie]

Tell these fables to someone else.

[Majar]

Monogamy - one partner only for all of life?

This is the way it should be. :icon_yes:

[Cynodon]

Serial polygamy - several different partners for several different periods?

Pure promiscuity/libertinism - no permanent limits, just whatever you feel like?

Floating between these two, depending on how interesting or boring women are.

[Vulpix]

OT discussion moved here (http://www.theapricity.com/forum/showthread.php?t=14973).

[Antonine]

Monogamy, but if I had the money and power I would be a polygynist.

I'm not an idealist and have all but given up.

[Blood Trinity]

As much fun as it is to try to conquer as many chicks as possible, a serious and faithful relationship is always more rewarding, without question.

....

Pretty gay, yeah? :P

[Cato]

As much fun as it is to try to conquer as many chicks as possible, a serious and faithful relationship is always more rewarding, without question.

....

Pretty gay, yeah? :P

No, it's a highly honorable and praiseworthy position that you hold. Beasts take many mates in a lifetime, but a higher form of life called mankind is capable of being more than a mere beast (indeed, even being called Godlike). Niggers rut like dirty animals; are we to be the same as they? :mad:

[Klärchen]

Love is not the result of adequate sexual satisfaction, but sexual happiness – even the knowledge of the so-called sexual technique – is the result of love. If aside from everyday observation this thesis needed to be proved, such proof can be found in ample material of psychoanalytic data. The study of the most frequent sexual problems – frigidity in women and the more or less severe forms of psychic impotence in men – shows that the cause does not lie in the lack of knowledge of the right technique, but in the inhibitions which make it impossible to love. Fear of or hatred for the other sex are at the bottom of those difficulties which prevent a person from giving himself completely, from acting spontaneously, from trusting the sexual partner in the immediacy and directness of physical closeness. If a sexually inhibited person can emerge from fear or hate, and hence become capable of loving, his or her sexual problems are solved. If not, no amout of knowledge about sexual techniques will help.

(from: The Art of Loving (http://www.scribd.com/doc/3200550/The-Art-of-Loving), p. 89, by Erich Fromm)

:p :p :p :p :p :p :p

[Blood Trinity]

No, it's a highly honorable and praiseworthy position that you hold. Beasts take many mates in a lifetime, but a higher form of life called mankind is capable of being more than a mere beast (indeed, even being called Godlike). Niggers rut like dirty animals; are we to be the same as they? :mad:

Well, thats just me. Relationships in an age where archetypal men and women respectively seem to be a concept fading from existence can also complicate your life. Both roads are worth traveling, but the choice when presented is always obvious for me. Hence, I am not so quick to call someone a "nigger" just because they score lots of girls in a casual manner. :D

[Grey]

I guess I fall between "monogamy" and "serial monogamy." I enjoy getting to know women both emotionally and physically. Sometimes I know even before beginning a relationship that it won't last, though that's not really what matters; these are often more intense for their temporary nature. At this point, though, I've settled into a permanent relationship and I'm extremely happy. A few people find that odd considering my age, but I saw the opportunity to be with an absolutely perfect woman and I took it instead of waiting around for another.

[antonio]

Indeed you get the point. It's a question of choosing between a time frame ranging from late teenies to late thirties (maybe more). It's like choosing a house, a hard task and if you got much money you'll get more and better options.

Ps. Check out folks the brilliant double-sense on the last conditional.:cool:

[Austin]

I prefer my own itinerary so to speak but even still I intend to find my girl eventually once I'm on a more even-keel lifestyle wise and done with the societal hell which is school. Have had relationships but never ones where I knew it was long-term. I've delved in the world of college girls enough to know that superficial socialites who's world revolves around the next night out are not what I want but can be and were fun behind closed doors for a young guy such as myself. Can safely say I was a complete novice before university in regards to women on a sexual/verbal confidence level yet now I am 100% confident in my 'abilities' so to speak(:

Had this one girl, blond, green eyes, no breasts really though but she had that sleek slender sexy build and long blond hair which did it for me, anyways was with her and she actually said to me (this was early on in my experiences) 'okay let me be in control' in bed....man that pissed me off at the time....anyways that was a good night as I recall...whole new field of knowledge opened up in my mind.


One amusing occurrence I noticed maybe because there are more income conscious women in Texas towards men, I don't really know, is that most women who are my age and are in serious relationships will be found with young professionals of the ages of 25-32 instead of their own age group, which I have always found annoying. Then I realized that when I'm the young professional with the new BMW/Lexus/Mercedes and all that I'll be able to get the same deal which isn't so bad now after thinking about it (:

[Vulpix]

...she actually said to me (this was early on in my experiences) 'okay let me be in control' in bed....man that pissed me off at the time....

:rolleyes2::rolleyes2::rolleyes2:

By the way domination fail: a dominatrix doesn't ask!

[Austin]

shutap (:

[Vulpix]

shutap (:

I'm the admin here. YOU shut up.

[Amapola]

:rolleyes2::rolleyes2::rolleyes2:

By the way domination fail: a dominatrix doesn't ask!

on your fours, you dog! :cool:

[Rainraven]

I'm pretty simple..

Up for anything as long as its safe and consensual ;)

[Austin]

well you lost because I never said shutup

[admin note: user was tempbanned for this post]

[Vulpix]

Up for anything as long as its safe and consensual ;)

fixed :p! ;)

[Fortis in Arduis]

fixed :p! ;)

Many women are worthless whores who will do anything for money or power!

Am I allowed to say that in Swedopricity?

Oh, I'll take that bit out then! :tongue

[SwordoftheVistula]

Many women are worthless whores who will do anything for money or power!

Well at least they're not doing it for dusty antique furniture :D

[Fintorah]

Never actually had sex with a girl, and don't really want it. I have had several girlfriends, but always broken it off if there was too much sexual tension.

Edit: I have an Asian fetish.

[Bloodeagle]

Never actually had sex with a girl, and don't really want it. I have had several girlfriends, but always broken it off if there was too much sexual tension.

For some reason I find Asian women (without any admixture) immensely more attractive than any other kind of woman, and there aren't many of them in my area. I've already dated most of the ones that go to my high school. They tend to pay me more attention than other races. I guess they like something about tall guys.

:eek: Please, don't ever have sex!

[poiuytrewq0987]

Never actually had sex with a girl, and don't really want it. I have had several girlfriends, but always broken it off if there was too much sexual tension.

Edit: I have an Asian fetish.

http://media.ebaumsworld.com/mediaFiles/picture/305382/461956.png

[Turkophagos]

Last year: Monogamy.


For 17 years before the last one: Fuck first, ask questions later.

[tired]

I married my wife at 18 ,only woman I slept with ,now getting divorsed,no kids

[M.I.A.]

I'm a pansexual dominatrix with a touch of dendrophilia

[Fintorah]

Dendrophilia? So these must arouse you?
http://www.bushcraftliving.com/gallery/images/5/large/1_tree-penis-vagina.jpg
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_RJiNbBEi1F4/SLwPkVxKLZI/AAAAAAAAAiQ/fI17J6jPo9k/s400/penis%2520tree.jpg
http://www.wiskate.com/news/data/upimages/picoday_tree_penis.jpg
http://fracas.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/foodporn_treeofplenty.jpg
http://mvn.net/syzygy/planet/images/0088/tree.jpg
http://lh5.ggpht.com/_gvn0WWeVikw/R0jTzzihi9I/AAAAAAAADm0/GJlxMSC2v94/cam0039.JPG
http://oddculture.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/adam_starr_penis_tree.jpg
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3277/2695766783_8cf4c5f522.jpg



Perhaps I went too far.

[M.I.A.]

I prefer "subtle sexy" if you know what I mean. A hint of phallic or vulva is perfectly arousing but over the top, in your face sexuality just intimidates me, especially when it comes to dendra.

[Jarl]

I married my wife at 18 ,only woman I slept with ,now getting divorsed,no kids

Early... Anyway, pity to hear that you're divorcing.

[Eldritch]

I'm a pansexual dominatrix with a touch of dendrophilia

Since you're pansexual, are you also aroused by bridges, "sexy fences" and by the Berlin Wall by any chance?

[SwordoftheVistula]

Don't forget cars and bicycles :thumb001:

[poiuytrewq0987]

I can't imagine having sex with a tree, trees are not smooth and soft. :icon_lol:

[tired]

Early... Anyway, pity to hear that you're divorcing.

My wife is a really good person,we will always be friends,

[Klärchen]

Wonderful: Love Can Last (http://commcgi.cc.stonybrook.edu/am2/publish/General_University_News_2/Love_Can_Last_SBU_Imaging_Study_Shows_Brain_Activi ty_Of_Those_In_Love_Long_Term_Similar_To_Those_New ly_In_Love.shtml) :love0034:

[blan]

This is highly improbable in today's world. Are you gonna stay with that girl who you dated in high school for the rest of your life? Not gonna happen aside exceptions.

my sister is married to the man she met in secondary school

[blan]

i will describe myself as a international playboy like james bond or indiana jones. but like indiana jones i am bound to find the one and settle down....i just hope i find her before i am 75 years old

[Moonbird]

Up to the present serial monogamy.

[blan]

[QUOTE=Vonnita;328498]Up to the present serial monogamy.[/QUOTE

yes cereal monogamy is good!!!

[2DREZQ]

This is highly improbable in today's world. Are you gonna stay with that girl who you dated in high school for the rest of your life? Not gonna happen aside exceptions.

I'd stipulate that nothing in the universe happens, exceptions aside (No Big Bangs, one exception aside (yup, intentional double entendre))

Moving on to MY exception.

It was a hot summer evening in 1978...she was in my best friends car (blind and only date) when I pulled up alongside. He stood up for me at the wedding.

27th of June, Nineteen-eighty-one.

My first
My only
Ever.
Absolutely the smartest thing I ever did.

[Piparskeggr]

Hail all;

As I've received a few recent positive rep messages for a couple of my posts in this thread, I decided to revisit it.

Been quite a ride since I last wrote in April (just a few weeks after my dad died). I gained a great nephew, lost my last grandparent, have seen my wife heal appreciably from the PTSD she has from her time in the USAF, suffered aggravations at work, told my department manager I think of her as fondly as I do my sisters (one of the few bosses I've had that I both like and respect), got my pickup totaled just before Christmas...

Through it all, my wife (Anita) and I remain in love, each other's best friend and comrade...

I am absolutely insane about Anita, remembering all the anniversaries: 27 August 1977 (1st time I saw her), 3 September 1977 (1st time we spoke), 24 September 1977 (1st time we had an extended conversation), 2 December 1977 (joined me and my other friends [with her boyfriend of the time] at OUR table in the cadet snack bar), 21 December 1977 (got a ride home with me for the Christmas break)...2 February 1978 (she accepted my invitation to the upcoming formal dance), 10 February 1978 (our 1st date, the informal dance on Friday night), 11 February 1978 (the Formal - the picture's been in my wallet since I got it a month after the date)
http://www.theapricity.com/forum/picture.php?albumid=11&pictureid=1277

...11 July 1978 (it took be almost an hour to get out the words, "Will you marry me." Anita replied, "Yes, maybe.") 15 July 1978 (our parents had a picnic and open house that lasted from noon until midnight to announce the coming event)

...26 June 1982 (our wedding day, yes, almost 4 years)...

You get the picture.

Love can last...

If she is getting late from returning from one of her appointments, I find myself getting up to look out the window. I feel mad and happy when she does return.

One of the young women at work was interested in me a few years ago. I overheard her talking to another of the young women..."Steven, is he married?" "Steven, he's nice, isn't he?" "Yeah..." "Well, he's not married." "Oh, really!?" "Wait a minute...he's beyond married. Get him talking about his wife...he glows."

It was a doubly nice feeling, both that a lovely young woman was interested in this somewhat battered man, and that my obvious devotion to my wife was both noticed and appreciated.

I know that not all men and women are built like that (emotionally and intellectually).

This is something, which has sustained me for almost 33 years.

If this is something that could sustain you, good.

If some other way of gaining emotional and intellectual fulfillment in personal relationships works better, that's fine, too.

One of the very valuable lessons I learned from my parents was, it is not my way or the highway.

My only real advice, find love as best you can, whether it be Eros or Agape, and let those you love know it, right now.

[Piparskeggr]

http://www.theapricity.com/forum/picture.php?albumid=11&pictureid=682

...and here we are, a couple of years ago, the picture we used for our Yule/Christmas cards.

[Peerkons]

Congratulations! :)
Im really happy that someone has "love".

[2DREZQ]

I couldn't agree with you more.
Nice to know there are other SOB's (term of endearment) out there who got as lucky as I did.

It will be 30 years this June 27th. Our first years were, as are many, a little rough. I was still growing up, and she was getting over a dysfunctional alcoholic family life. We matured side-by-side. I'm addicted to her presence. Endorphins, I suppose. She does well in areas that I struggle, and I support her unconditionally.
It's easy to see temptation around you (although when you get older and more 'geezerly' it gets easier to ignore.) Why pass up ownership of a '66 Corvette for one ride in a Yugo?
AND SHE CAN COOK!

[Piparskeggr]

Congratulations! :)
Im really happy that someone has "love".

There is a fullness to my feelings towards my wife.

In some ways we are very rational in our feelings towards each other, and in others, pleasantly irrational.

Love does not mean that life is without hurt. We have hurt each other some over the years.

However, we have learned that a life without scars is a life of "Not Doing."

The key is that we have never sought to cause Harm to each other.

That is one key, I think and believe...hurt versus harm; knowing the difference, living the difference.

Part of the reason we were engaged so long is that we wanted to be sure of each other, to talk things out, ahead of making that (for us) Permanent Commitment...both of us believe in "til death do us part." (Though Anita has quipped a few times that it might be homicide rather than natural causes.)

Another key is fully accepting that the other partner in the couple is fully themselves, not a reflection or shadow of you.

Anita's academic adviser at the college we attended was an old, married man...Professor Schmukal...she told me after we had started "going steady," that he had counseled her about college relationships.

His advice...date a man who likes cats. A man who likes cats, will respect that a woman is her own self and person. The 2 other fellows she dated were "dog-persons." the second one...I put him in the hospital for 6-weeks when he hurt her. He and I finally "buried the hatchet" a couple of months ago. (Over 32 years later, he finally accepted the responsibility for the Harm he caused.)

The BIG thing, you have to know who you are before you can be of any use to anyone else.

In my observation, fully self-defined personalities are most likely to find long term relationships and satisfaction than ill-defined folk.

[2DREZQ]

In some ways we are very rational in our feelings towards each other, and in others, pleasantly irrational.

Love does not mean that life is without hurt. We have hurt each other some over the years.

However, we have learned that a life without scars is a life of "Not Doing."

The key is that we have never sought to cause Harm to each other.

That is one key, I think and believe...hurt versus harm; knowing the difference, living the difference.

Another key is fully accepting that the other partner in the couple is fully themselves, not a reflection or shadow of you.

The BIG thing, you have to know who you are before you can be of any use to anyone else.

In my observation, fully self-defined personalities are most likely to find long term relationships and satisfaction than ill-defined folk.

I might have worded it differently, but yours is, I think, very well put.

We were engaged/dated from the summer of '78 to the spring of '81. In part because it took that long for me to prove to her I wasn't the arrogant SOB persona I had created for the consumption of others. I still have a hard time understanding how she was able to see past that and see the person I could be. Without a doubt, I would not be the man I am without her. (I'm a pretty good guy, even if I do have to say so myself!) What kind of debt is incurred to someone who transforms your life into something of beauty and value? Something good enough that I can lay down one day, for the last time, and say: "I am content."?

BTW: If anyone ever hurt her? (Like your old aquaintance) I have several firearms and a wide selection of shovels.

[2DREZQ]

Back to Topic:

The choices might be to narrow, or at least less entertaining than they might be.

Power Exchange Relationships

Chaste Romantic

Assorted deviant

Imaginary

??

[Sally]

i will describe myself as a international playboy like james bond or indiana jones. but like indiana jones i am bound to find the one and settle down....i just hope i find her before i am 75 years old

I can't help it...

Bk1wUKoXL20

[Wyn]

Four wives - the Muslims have the right idea. :cool:

A monogamous relationship is really the only type I'd feel comfortable in, at least for any extended period of time. In the long term, I'd say contentment in a relationship in which the other partner is polygamous is nearly unattainable for most. A lot of people seem quite satisfied in "open relationships" and so on, but I don't imagine that there are many who would be happy to share a partner with multiple others for a great deal of time. At least not if they felt a genuine affection for them.

[Blood Trinity]

Me? Young and unobligated, as it should be. I am not old enough or financially independent enough at this moment to think too deeply about marriage or kids, I can only learn more lessons until that time comes with the right person. I'm not convinced girls of my age group are to be taken too seriously unless there's going to be a future together more than a few years long followed by the predictable breakup scenario we've all had before and the ensuing silly withdrawal symptoms that follow. Who can find the time for the illusion of romanticism at 21? :P

[SwordoftheVistula]

I put him in the hospital for 6-weeks when he hurt her.

That's gone the way of holding the door open for women. These days, you would be looking at a variety of charges quite likely to include 'attempted murder' and 'assault with a deadly weapon'.

[NordicPower]

There can only be one for me, the other stuff just doesn't interest me and never has.

It must be that special person who knows you the best, and still loves you and wants to be with you.
The one who you can eventually talk about anything with, and share all of life's most important experiences.
When two people can grow and develop together instead of stagnating, that's a lasting love.

I have one such shining diamond... my one and only :love:

[Piparskeggr]

That's gone the way of holding the door open for women. These days, you would be looking at a variety of charges quite likely to include 'attempted murder' and 'assault with a deadly weapon'.

True, comes from having a Criminal Justice system instead of a Victim's Justice system, plus the attitude that "poor murderer, he's just as big a victim of society as the person he's alleged to have killed is of him."

[2DREZQ]

True, comes from having a Criminal Justice system instead of a Victim's Justice system, plus the attitude that "poor murderer, he's just as big a victim of society as the person he's alleged to have killed is of him."

Ah! For the the days when "He just neeeded killin'!" was a legitimate defence!

[lei.talk]

Monogamy - one partner only for all of life?

Serial monogamy - one partner only, for limited periods? How limited? Extremely short relationships, which are mostly sexual? Or longer relationships?

Polygamy - several partners for all life?

Serial polygamy - several different partners for several different periods?

Pure promiscuity/libertinism - no permanent limits, just whatever you feel like?

What are the benefits/disadvantages of these different styles? Why choose one over the other?

Do you even question how you live? Why not?

under which
would be categorised "bonobo (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bonobo#Sexual_social_behavior)-esque"?


does any one else recognise every single one of these trees?
on a clear day you can see catalina (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Santa_Catalina_Island,_California)


http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/1/1c/Stephen_Stills_-_Love_The_One.jpg/120px-Stephen_Stills_-_Love_The_One.jpg (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love_the_One_You%27re_With)

[Anglo Saxon]

.:rolleyes:

[NordicPower]

.:rolleyes:

Looks like you're off to a good start...;)

[Aemma]

That's gone the way of holding the door open for women. These days, you would be looking at a variety of charges quite likely to include 'attempted murder' and 'assault with a deadly weapon'.

Major thread hijacking but...I miss that. :(

[Osweo]

Major thread hijacking but...I miss that. :(

Aye, and it's potentially dangerous for our health not to do this. Women's hands should be kept safe from dirty doorhandle bacteria, in prompt readiness for any sammich making that may be required of them by their masters.

[Aemma]

Aye, and it's potentially dangerous for our health not to do this. Women's hands should be kept safe from dirty doorhandle bacteria, in prompt readiness for any sammich making that may be required of them by their masters.

Aww Ossi, there's nothing in this life that would please me more than to serve you, my Lord and Master, and make you a sammich. Fancy some knuckle today?

[Osweo]

Fancy some knuckle today?

Sure thing, Toots!

Git boiling! Hmm, put some mustard on too, there's a good lass.
http://afropanavisions.com/images/recipe%20pig%20knuckles.jpg
:yumyum:

*pats Aem's bum as she trots off to the kitchen*

[Aemma]

Well Sweetums, now that we've been intimate and you've patted my bum, it's time you bought me some jewelry. Not some garrish diamond though...no, no. Such will not do. How about a symbol of something I'd love to give you everyday of your life, over and over again?

http://i56.tinypic.com/bj8ghx.jpg

[Osweo]

Well Sweetums, now that we've been intimate and you've patted my bum, it's time you bought me some jewelry. Not some garrish diamond though...no, no. Such will not do. How about a symbol of something I'd love to give you everyday of your life, over and over again?

http://i56.tinypic.com/bj8ghx.jpg

Aw!!!!!! How sweet! :hug:

Two lovely slices of toast, and one of those poached-egg gadgets with FOUR eggs boiling away in it!! :clap:

You spoil me, you really do! :kiss:

I got YOU a treat too! See;
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/bb/Mangle.jpg

[Tolleson]

pats Aem's bum as she trots off to the kitchen*

There will be NO patting going on, Tootsie Roll! :aufsmaul_2:

[2DREZQ]

Aye, and it's potentially dangerous for our health not to do this. Women's hands should be kept safe from dirty doorhandle bacteria, in prompt readiness for any sammich making that may be required of them by their masters.

And they tell me that I take to many chances with my life...:thumb001:

[Hellfuhrer]

Monogamy is what would be the goal to strive towards in modern society is one plans to have children, but it is not a huge deal if one gets divorced and their is nothing wrong with sex before marriage. Serial polygamy is fine if one does not plan to have kids. Pure promiscuity sounds like a bad idea, though I would prefer it if people did it instead of homosexual monogamy or interracial monogamy.

[SwordoftheVistula]

Pure promiscuity sounds like a bad idea, though I would prefer it if people did it instead of homosexual monogamy

Why is that better? Homosexuals don't have kids, and homosexual monogamy would seem to generate a lot less chaos in society than pure promiscuity.

[Electronic God-Man]

Pure promiscuity sounds like a bad idea, though I would prefer it if people did it instead of homosexual monogamy or interracial monogamy.

How is homosexual monogamy even an option out of pure promiscuity?

"I could either be fucking everyone or I could just decide to fuck dudes." WTF. Makes no sense.

[Tom Cat]

I've been married to a woman for over twenty years. I wouldn't have it any other way. Our lives are stable, orderly, productive, and satisfying. I can't say that about my lonely, frustrating days as a single man seeking what I have now.

[Harley]

Monogamous.

I get bored sometimes, and would love to be surrounded by men for their masculine presence.

It seems I have bad luck regarding this because any guy I’ve met with thus far just to hang out wants to have a sexual relationship, being okay with the fact that I’m married.

So, fuck me. Cut them niggas off. I’m going to be the person my husband trusts me to be. His love means more than these retarded weaknesses of the flesh.

[Svipdag]

Why do you not include celibacy ?

[Marmara]

A club? I've never been to one and don't like loud places. I only have like one real irl friend and she lives 4 hours away now.

Let me make you my fourth wife, you would have additional 3 irl friends. Good deal huh?

[coolfrenchguy]

i'am for trusted,steady,monoamory,with a girl who have the same values like me,you know what i'am not homophobic i wish to gays and lesbians to find the right partner like for all the straight people

[MiloshN]

When you study electric engineering

https://scontent.fbeg4-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/10409055_457016324449401_1331812588646356411_n.png ?_nc_cat=107&_nc_ht=scontent.fbeg4-1.fna&oh=f3c65953b601576acbacffbdabb30d94&oe=5CF68060
Translate:
When you call your friend to work in electrical engineering college
Image 1) What friends think what we do - Image 2) What parents think - Image 3) What you suggest to a friend what to do - Image 4) What we should do - Image 5) What are you really doing

[Papastratosels26]

Monogamy

[Celestia]

I'd prefer monogamy but I would be up for serial monogamy

[Nazarene]

Monogamy inshallah

[El_Abominacion]

non existent

[Bradleyco]

Monogamy. But it seems like I would have much more 1 partner. Life is life

[coolfrenchguy]

i'am for trusted,steady,monoamory,with a girl who have the same values like me,you know what i'am not homophobic i wish to gays and lesbians to find the right partner like for all the straight people

I have allready answered ,plenty of times,but i add than my conception of sexuality couldn't been separated form the sacrality of love in a unique and exclusive monoamory/monogamy longterm/lifetime relationship (marriage or civil union if she want it) with a true high drive sexuality,it's the seal of a good relation,without sex ,hard sex,without a relation couldn't work really completly,it's mainly the main problem of our last decades,a surexposed sexuality,extreme sexual behaviours but aside a deep distress,many people with bordeline psychiatric issues,depression etc...

[Ayetooey]

Monogamy.

[nittionia]

Halal lifestyle


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[Jana]

Monogamy.

[Ylla]

Monogamy

It depends on religious and social views but i think with one partner you can build a really deep connection with each other and if kids are involved its a healthy environment for them (mama, dad and kids :heartbea:).

[Adamastor]

Polygamy for now but open to monogamic relationships.

[Seya]

one life one love

[Daos777]

Islamic style polygamy. I get 20 wives. And they only get to have me because I’m worth more than 20 of them combined because allah said “men > 19 women”


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[Harley]

Monogamy.

Idk about polygamy because it sounds cool and everything, but if you have multiple partners you have to understand and relate to, etc, it can get difficult to manage different personalities; especially if you’re a chick attempting to manage multiple males lol.

I feel like sometimes people are afraid of losing intimacy with someone else. It’s already difficult to obtain a partner, but to willingly share a partner with someone else? Even rougher.

There is something inherently nice about nestling one’s body against your man at the end of the day. What good are multiples for when you just need to choose the right one?

[itilvolga]

Monogamy.

[ВЛАД]

Selective Polygamy.

Maximum >10 qualitatively sexual girls in my life, which will abide decree my rules. Every young girls on maximum 3 years have free relationships with me.

Family is doesnt exist in 21 century

[Celestia]

Monogamy.
I realized I’m not about the serial monogamy life

[Cumansky]

I'm about that monogamy real talk 100

[Dick]

I'm about that monogamy real talk 100

So many Calabrese shawtys so little time

[Celestia]

Monogamy.

Idk about polygamy because it sounds cool and everything, but if you have multiple partners you have to understand and relate to, etc, it can get difficult to manage different personalities; especially if you’re a chick attempting to manage multiple males lol.

I feel like sometimes people are afraid of losing intimacy with someone else. It’s already difficult to obtain a partner, but to willingly share a partner with someone else? Even rougher.

There is something inherently nice about nestling one’s body against your man at the end of the day. What good are multiples for when you just need to choose the right one?

I need your wisdom and guidance Metal :(

[The Blade]

My answer:
Serial monogamy - one partner only, for limited periods? How limited? Extremely short relationships, which are mostly sexual? Or longer relationships?
I have had both in my life. My goal at the moment is the latter to prevail.

[Daos777]

Polygamy. Act like nice guy. Get girl pregnant. Move to different country and never be seen again as she struggles to raise the child.

[Johannes Wilhelm]

The normal one.

[Freeroostah]

My hand.

This but I'll start Nofap soon

[El_Abominacion]

Monogamy. Polygamy disgusts me

[Alexandro]

I have only ever been monogamous so no idea, although I am kind of interested in how a polyamorous relationship even works. My only girlfriend is already a handful, can't imagine having multiple, lmao.

[joanna_38]

Monogamy. I'm too insecure of my partner being more into the other woman than me.

[Vessna]

“Serial monogamy - one partner only, for limited periods? How limited? Extremely short relationships, which are mostly sexual? Or longer relationships?”

I am a serial monogamist in my third long-term relationship/first marriage. I don’t know how long we are going to be together. Could be til death do us part, or maybe we will sign divorce papers tomorrow. Although we probably go broke fighting for custody [emoji28]

[Abti]

Open relationship but my end is open.

JK.

[Brás Garcia de Mascarenhas]

https://www.indy100.com/media-library/picture.jpg?id=28118655&width=776&quality=80

Monogamous. Almost all dysfunctional cultures tend to have one thing in common: polygamy.

[Mortimer]

My sexual lifestyle now and for most of my life was/is single-celibate

[Brás Garcia de Mascarenhas]

My sexual lifestyle now and for most of my life was/is single-celibate

The question in this thread is poorly formulated because it's about relational types rather than sexual lifestyles. You're not celibate, being celibate implies that you've made a conscious and voluntary choice of abstaining from marriage and\or sex, which is not your case.

[Mortimer]

The question in this thread is poorly formulated because it's about relational types rather than sexual lifestyles. You're not celibate, being celibate implies that you've made a conscious and voluntary choice of abstaining from marriage and\or sex, which is not your case.

In ideal case i prefer monogamy, one partner for life. but that doesnt work really it seems anymore, most people nowadays practice serial monogamy i think.

[The_Strategist]

I use Tinder for hookups. Prefer long term relationships

[Vessna]

In ideal case i prefer monogamy, one partner for life. but that doesnt work really it seems anymore, most people nowadays practice serial monogamy i think.

Monogamy is ideal, no doubts about it. Only sometimes things don’t go the way we had imagined. People change, grow apart, substance or psychological/physical abuse can happen. Most of us want to live a fulfilling happy life. If relationships are toxic to the point that you are unable to reconcile, it’s best to let it go imo. I’d rather be single/divorced than stay in an unhappy relationship.


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[Mortimer]

Monogamy is ideal, no doubts about it. Only sometimes things don’t go the way we had imagined. People change, grow apart, substance or psychological/physical abuse can happen. Most of us want to live a fulfilling happy life. If relationships are toxic to the point that you are unable to reconcile, it’s best to let it go imo. I’d rather be single/divorced than stay in an unhappy relationship.


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I agree

[Hektor12]

Serial monogamy in the past - from 2-3 months to rarely a year
Absolute monogamy now - for years

Sexual life shouldnt be the priority. Its of course important but in the end its the furthest point of going intimate which starts with a smile and a kiss. You need a background to be closer than ever with somebody which is basically a stable relationship with a positive and respectable partner. This is, at least, my take.

[Touijer]

https://www.indy100.com/media-library/picture.jpg?id=28118655&width=776&quality=80

Monogamous. Almost all dysfunctional cultures tend to have one thing in common: polygamy.

Most successful civilizations were all polygamous like the Mongol Horde, Roman Empire, all Muslim empires. Monogamous rulers was a risk because the women usually will take over the throne behind the scenes.

Most men are polygamous anyways thought they don’t do it officially but by being sneaky

Tell me 1 ancient ruler who didn’t have any concubines and was successful reigning his dynasty, none.

[Ugo]

A man leaves his family because he wants emotional variety. A man has a trait - to conquer different women. Sex has nothing to do with this. Sooner or later, a man will leave for other women, otherwise his eyes will fade. A woman leaves a man most often because she is a fool. Women are often stupid and emotionally selfish. I hope I won't be banned for saying this. Banning me is already normal.

[Vessna]

A man leaves his family because he wants emotional variety. A man has a trait - to conquer different women. Sex has nothing to do with this. Sooner or later, a man will leave for other women, otherwise his eyes will fade. A woman leaves a man most often because she is a fool. Women are often stupid and emotionally selfish. I hope I won't be banned for saying this. Banning me is already normal.

A woman leaves a man when he’s a total loser or a misogynistic prick like you.


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[Hektor12]

A woman leaves a man when he’s a total loser or a misogynistic prick like you.

He has a point tho. The main thing for men or at least for me is indeed conquering the woman. Sex is just a benefit, a "certificate" of the conquer.

[Vessna]

He has a point tho. The main thing for men or at least for me is indeed conquering the woman. Sex is just a benefit, a "certificate" of the conquer.

As you can see I specifically clarified why women leave. I am not arguing why men leave since I am not a man.


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[Ugo]

He has a point tho. The main thing for men or at least for me is indeed conquering the woman. Sex is just a benefit, a "certificate" of the conquer.

Absolutely right. "Сertificate" of the conqueror. And the next day I put her on my ignore list. Especially if you are married....Men who do not cheat, over time turn into shit that is not interesting to their wife.

[Ugo]

A woman leaves a man when he’s a total loser or a misogynistic prick like you.


Sent from my iPhone using TapatalkI'm not a misogynist. You can be frank. Have you cheated on your husband? This information will remain between us.

[Vessna]

Absolutely right. "Сertificate" of the conqueror. And the next day I put her on my ignore list. Especially if you are married....Men who do not cheat, over time turn into shit that is not interesting to their wife.

“Сертификат завоевателя” [emoji1]


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[Hektor12]

Absolutely right. "Сertificate" of the conqueror. And the next day I put her on my ignore list. Especially if you are married....Men who do not cheat, over time turn into shit that is not interesting to their wife.

I think we can make an exception for women smart enough to worth conquering every new day again. This, at least worked with me, im still stuck with her.

[Vessna]

I'm not a misogynist. You can be frank. Have you cheated on your husband? This information will remain between us.

Yes, it will remain between us because we are obviously in a completely private space :D


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[majevica]

Monogamy is the best, but some people seem not to be made for it.

[Ugo]

When Vessna appeared, the forum became much more interesting. Our Russian girls are the best everywhere!) It’s a pleasure to quarrel with her, and to talk in a friendly way too. These EHG are real people, not robots. I like all the Russians on this forum, except Victor. I even read the messages of the idiot Count Liberissimo with interest.

[Brás Garcia de Mascarenhas]

Most successful civilizations were all polygamous like the Mongol Horde, Roman Empire, all Muslim empires. Monogamous rulers was a risk because the women usually will take over the throne behind the scenes.

The Mongol Horde being a successful civilization is nonsense, calling it a civilization is even highly debatable. It was a successful war machine. The Romans were monogamous, they had one spouse through marriage (having extramarital affairs does not mean it was a polygamous society). Muslims are successful when contrasted with what is the worst time in European history, the Dark Ages. They have stagnated until the present day and continue to live in the Middle Ages when it comes to political and civic rights.


Most men are polygamous anyways thought they don’t do it officially but by being sneaky

Speak for yourself.


Tell me 1 ancient ruler who didn’t have any concubines and was successful reigning his dynasty, none.

The lifestyle of past monarchs or rulers of absolutist kingdoms doesn't matter at all and it is pointless to draw a parallelism with advanced cultures because their lifestyle was not representative of the lifestyle of the local people. Yes, we know they had lavish and luxurious lifestyles whereas 99% of the remaining population did not. You also don't realize that having concubines, prostitutes or extramarital affairs is not the same as being polygamous. Being polygamous means marrying multiple spouses and at least in Europe I can not think of any Christian ruler who married several women simultaneously without divorcing first.

[Ugo]

The Mongol Horde being a successful civilization is nonsense, calling it a civilization is even highly debatable. It was a successful war machine. The Romans were monogamous, they had one spouse through marriage (having extramarital affairs does not mean it was a polygamous society). Muslims are successful when contrasted with what is the worst time in European history, the Dark Ages. They have stagnated until the present day and continue to live in the Middle Ages when it comes to political and civic rights.



Speak for yourself.



The lifestyle of past monarchs or rulers of absolutist kingdoms doesn't matter at all and it is pointless to draw a parallelism with advanced cultures because their lifestyle was not representative of the lifestyle of the local people. Yes, we know they had lavish and luxurious lifestyles whereas 99% of the remaining population did not. You also don't realize that having concubines, prostitutes or extramarital affairs is not the same as being polygamous. Being polygamous means marrying multiple spouses and at least in Europe I can not think of any Christian ruler who married several women simultaneously without divorcing first.
Not true. Arabs, Muslims have always been a developed civilization. The decline of Arab civilization occurred under the pressure of Rome, and then the transgender West. The Mongol-Tatars at the time of their existence were a very developed and tolerant nation. They were cruel - at the level of the entire Middle Ages...but they have never infringed on the rights of the Orthodox. They were very tolerant of Orthodoxy, as well as various nationalities, races and religions. Isn't that true humanity? You again do not know anything and begin to assert something authoritatively.

[Brás Garcia de Mascarenhas]

Not true. Arabs, Muslims have always been a developed civilization. The decline of Arab civilization occurred under the pressure of Rome, and then the transgender West. The Mongol-Tatars at the time of their existence were a very developed and tolerant nation. They were cruel - at the level of the entire Middle Ages...but they have never infringed on the rights of the Orthodox. They were very tolerant of Orthodoxy, as well as various nationalities, races and religions. Isn't that true humanity? You again do not know anything and begin to assert something authoritatively.

Define Arabs, which ones are you referring to? Those who live well today simply by chance of having found oil in the Persian Gulf were still living in tents like gypsies not even a hundred years ago.

The Mongols being a civilization is very dubious. Tell me which language, architecture, infrastructure, technological advancements, literature, regulations, agricultural systems and so on did they left in Russia that can be witnessed today? You loving the Mongols does not mean that there was a Mongol civilization.

[Touijer]

The Mongol Horde being a successful civilization is nonsense, calling it a civilization is even highly debatable. It was a successful war machine. The Romans were monogamous, they had one spouse through marriage (having extramarital affairs does not mean it was a polygamous society). Muslims are successful when contrasted with what is the worst time in European history, the Dark Ages. They have stagnated until the present day and continue to live in the Middle Ages when it comes to political and civic rights

Extramarital affaires counts as polygamy, matter of fact you do it behind your wives back and takes more effort into it. There’s absolutely no debate about this.
Romans weren’t monogamous in absolutely no shape or form. For Muslim empires you say it coincides with the Dark ages of Europe, you keep finding excuses to deny that there was no monogamous civilization.


Speak for yourself.

I don’t speak for me but for people who criticize having 4 wives yet most have secret partners, it’s polygamy in an unhealthy way


You also don't realize that having concubines, prostitutes or extramarital affairs is not the same as being polygamous. Being polygamous means marrying multiple spouses and at least in Europe I can not think of any Christian ruler who married several women simultaneously without divorcing first.

No, no, no. You’re wrong if you keep claiming that having multiple partners behind your wives back isn’t polygamy. It’s normal for men to have desire of multiple women and studies show that men with multiple wives have higher testosterone. Historical wise you have Genghis Khan who had 1000 kids and had a big empire, when he died the empire was big, your talking about his descendants when you claim it was short lived but even with that it’s just an exemple of one of the big empires who were polygamous. Ottomans lasted a millennium but they’re in the Muslim empire category

[Brás Garcia de Mascarenhas]

Extramarital affaires counts as polygamy, matter of fact you do it behind your wives back and takes more effort into it. There’s absolutely no debate about this.
Romans weren’t monogamous in absolutely no shape or form. For Muslim empires you say it coincides with the Dark ages of Europe, you keep finding excuses to deny that there was no monogamous civilization.



I don’t speak for me but for people who criticize having 4 wives yet most have secret partners, it’s polygamy in an unhealthy way

.

No, no, no. You’re wrong if you keep claiming that having multiple partners behind your wives back isn’t polygamy. It’s normal for men to have desire of multiple women and studies show that men with multiple wives have higher testosterone. Historical wise you have Genghis Khan who had 1000 kids and had a big empire, when he died the empire was big, your talking about his descendants

I'm not going to have this debate with you if you do not even know what polygamy is. You think that adultery is the same when it is not. Learn the meaning of the terms you employ before you make a fool of yourself.

[Vessna]

Extramarital affaires counts as polygamy, matter of fact you do it behind your wives back and takes more effort into it. There’s absolutely no debate about this.
Romans weren’t monogamous in absolutely no shape or form. For Muslim empires you say it coincides with the Dark ages of Europe, you keep finding excuses to deny that there was no monogamous civilization.



I don’t speak for me but for people who criticize having 4 wives yet most have secret partners, it’s polygamy in an unhealthy way

.

No, no, no. You’re wrong if you keep claiming that having multiple partners behind your wives back isn’t polygamy. It’s normal for men to have desire of multiple women and studies show that men with multiple wives have higher testosterone. Historical wise you have Genghis Khan who had 1000 kids and had a big empire, when he died the empire was big, your talking about his descendants when you claim it was short lived but even with that it’s just an exemple of one of the big empires who were polygamous. Ottomans lasted a millennium but they’re in the Muslim empire category

Developed world favors monogamy, whether you agree with it or not. Extramarital affairs are not illegal in developed countries, polygamy- having multiple spouses males or females - is illegal. An affair could land you in a court in a divorce process and would give your cheated spouse the right to sue your ass for alimony and all your assets. Polygamy can land you a prison term.


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[Incal]

So what are your sexual lifestyles?

Monogamy - one partner only for all of life?

Serial monogamy - one partner only, for limited periods? How limited? Extremely short relationships, which are mostly sexual? Or longer relationships?

Polygamy - several partners for all life?

Serial polygamy - several different partners for several different periods?

Pure promiscuity/libertinism - no permanent limits, just whatever you feel like?

What are the benefits/disadvantages of these different styles? Why choose one over the other?

Do you even question how you live? Why not?

Serial polygamy at least in practice because women don't fuck here lol