Lack of Empathy = Bad person ?

[Borna]

I have one question for you. Since we have so many wanna-be internet shrinks on this forum , i guess i can get my answer.

I realized i never truly felt any kind of empathy with someone in bad situation, unless it somehow had an impact on my life as well. I am generally cold person, but something what happened today, made me think about this. I realized i never felt any kind of sorrow, empathy or anything else when tragic events (I did not feel good about it either, just registered it, can't explain), or for example seeing a kid who begs on the street, or something different. I never complained to anyone about my problems, and i expect from people to do the same, but for some reason, lately, every now and then someone swarms me with his problems, expecting for me to help them. But i don't identify with their problems and ussually avoid anyone who is up for any kind of confession.

Today i have seen a girl i knew (Part of a larger circle of people i used to hang out with), and she was in horrible shape. I heard she started using heroine, and picture proved it. Her fingers were deformed, she had every third tooth, some odd looking eyes, and she was texting her drug dealer when i was in a que, waiting to visit my doctor. My friend was with me, and he kept talking how he feels sad for her, but i truly didn't care that much.

Does lack of empathy makes you a bad person ? Or just selfish one ?

[Borna]

SHameless bump.

[Shane]

I don't know if you're a bad person, but certainly it's hard for you to be a happy person.

Humans are social beings and can truly be happy if they live in happy and satisfied surrounding or society for that matter.

[Borna]

I don't know if you're a bad person, but certainly it's hard for you to be a happy person.

Humans are social beings and can truly be happy if they live in happy and satisfied surrounding or society for that matter.

What makes you think like that ? I think i am happy aside few things i am going to change very soon .
This isn't about hapiness, its about lack of empath.

[Shane]

Hmm in that case you would be a Sociopath. But, one fact saves you of that diagnosis. A sociopath would never question his behavior.

[Borna]

Hmm in that case you would be a Sociopath. But, one fact saves you of that diagnosis. A sociopath would never question his behavior.

I don't have problems with interfering with numerous people, i have rather large company of friends, i don't feel nervous or bad when around people. I think you are way off the target. Mainly its me who makes the contact with people i want to meet. I make friendships or lets say contacts extremely easy.

This is related somehow to my thought that everyone is responsible for what is happening to him (No matter how unfortunate faith was on him) and that i should not feel any sorrow because by some cosmic justice, he deserved it.

[Aldaris]

If this is the only problem, you're doing nothing wrong, since you can not control it. You simply cannot force yourself into an emotional reaction, when you don't feel it.

By the way, I'm similar. On theoretical level, I do care about people's lives and I'm strongly against any kind of injustice. But the motivation for my belief system is solely, that "I know it is right", emotional reactions to others' life situations are something I'm not really familiar with.

[Shane]

For example, I don't know if you've heard of a boy, Milan Basarac, who lives with his father in a shabby shack near Sisak. Me and my colleague from Sisak arranged help for him on our faculty and people who've were able to help were happy because of it including us. There is no better way of gaining than giving.

[Shane]

I don't have problems with interfering with numerous people, i have rather large company of friends, i don't feel nervous or bad when around people. I think you are way off the target. Mainly its me who makes the contact with people i want to meet. I make friendships or lets say contacts extremely easy.

This is related somehow to my thought that everyone is responsible for what is happening to him (No matter how unfortunate faith was on him) and that i should not feel any sorrow because by some cosmic justice, he deserved it.

A sociopath is often well liked because of their charm and high charisma, but they do not usually care about other people.

[Aldaris]

This is related somehow to my thought that everyone is responsible for what is happening to him (No matter how unfortunate faith was on him) and that i should not feel any sorrow because by some cosmic justice, he deserved it.

There is absolutely no base for such belief, in fact, numerous examples would prove, this is not the case.

[Piccolo]

I don't have problems with interfering with numerous people, i have rather large company of friends, i don't feel nervous or bad when around people. I think you are way off the target. Mainly its me who makes the contact with people i want to meet. I make friendships or lets say contacts extremely easy.

This is related somehow to my thought that everyone is responsible for what is happening to him (No matter how unfortunate faith was on him) and that i should not feel any sorrow because by some cosmic justice, he deserved it.

Interesting. I think, though, that sometimes people are stricken with things outside of their control. A child stricken with terminal cancer does nothing to deserve his or her disease. Same with a guy who is just driving around and is killed by a drunk driver. There are many misfortunes that happen to people for no good reason.

[Borna]

A sociopath is often well liked because of their charm and high charisma, but they do not usually care about other people.

I had different view on that term. I ussually thought it is a strongly introvert person, who is suffering from some kind of Asperger syndrome, who likes to be lonely, despise people and interfering with them. I don't hate anyone, i just seem not to care. I support helping the people who are in some kind of trouble, i helped them as well, but i never trully became passionate about their situation. I helped them because i thought it was right, not because i felt sad because of them.



By the way, I'm similar. On theoretical level, I do care about people's lives and I'm strongly against any kind of injustice.

Same.


emotional reactions to others' life situations are something I'm not really familiar with.

Few members of my family are complete opposite, they completely devote themself to the problems of their friends and similar. Specially my sister, i never understood it.

[Borna]

A child stricken with terminal cancer does nothing to deserve his or her disease. Same with a guy who is just driving around and is killed by a drunk driver.

Yes, i know that, but i wasn't reffering to such cases, i wrongly expressed myself. I thought about problem of adults who are MAINLY brought by themselves.

[Smaug]

Lack of empathy is a key feature of a psycopath, but since you are questioning yourself about it, I do not think that's the case.

[Borna]

Lack of empathy is a key feature of a psycopath, but since you are questioning yourself about it, I do not think that's the case.

According to Wikipedia, it is the most narccistic trait of all. I don't consider myself one.
I just can't feel any kind of identification with people's problems. I am not saying for example that i am not sad when i hear story about horrible crime or similar. I am speaking about everday issues people face.

Lets take the drug addict case i told you about. My friend looked to me as he genuinely worried and tried to find a reason to mourn her said faith.

According to this definition -


Empathy is a state where you can literally put yourself in the other person's place and understand their plight.

I can't, nor i feel any need.

[Smaug]

According to Wikipedia, it is the most narccistic trait of all. I don't consider myself one.
I just can't feel any kind of identification with people's problems.

Well, if you allow me a comment on that, lack of empathy is not always a bad thing in my opinion. Some people simply do not deserve it.

[Borna]

Well, if you allow me a comment on that, lack of empathy is not always a bad thing in my opinion. Some people simply do not deserve it.

That is what i am talking about, i am highly judgmental, towards myself and other people (Of course much more).


Empathy is a state where you can literally put yourself in the other person's place and understand their plight.

This is what i am talking about. I can't .

[Sideritis]

I am not sure if you are a bad person but definitely you would be the perfect NAZI burocrat drawing sketches on optimization practices for Jewish crematoriums.

[Loki]

Yes.

[Borna]

I am not sure if you are a bad person but definitely you would be the perfect NAZI burocrat drawing sketches on optimization practices for Jewish crematoriums.

My drawing skills are utterly bad. And no thanks, i strongly disslike any kind of responsibility for anyone else's life then mine. By helping in such thing you would bring insane burden on your back. I couldn't live with that.

[Sideritis]

My drawing skills are utterly bad. And no thanks, i strongly disslike any kind of responsibility for anyone else's life then mine. By helping in such thing you would bring insane burden on your back. I couldn't live with that.
So apparently you do care. Being selfish and lacking empathy may go hand in hand. You should see when you become a father. Maybe you have empathy but only for things close to you.

[Borna]

So apparently you do care. Being selfish and lacking empathy may go hand in hand. You should see when you become a father. Maybe you have empathy but only for things close to you.

There is short circle of people i really care about, but anything other that circle is meaningless to me.

[TheBlondeSalad]

To be honest, you sound like a sociopath - but admitting it on posting here is a good start to handling it. I would seek help if I were you in counselling. There could be a root causing this.

[Borna]

To be honest, you sound like a sociopath - but admitting it on posting here is a good start to handling it. I would seek help if I were you in counselling. There could be a root causing this.

It could be that i lived my whole life absent of problems, in well suited family , got everything i wanted, never really faced any life problems until recent times.
But my sister had same life, how come she is so different ? Though her altruistic character only caused problems for her (People she helped were rarely there for herself).

[Rædwald]

I would feel exactly the same in that situation.

[Drawing-slim]

It could be that i lived my whole life absent of problems, in well suited family , got everything i wanted, never really faced any life problems until recent times.
But my sister had same life, how come she is so different ? Though her altruistic character only caused problems for her (People she helped were rarely there for herself).
I think people like you are a rare gift to humanity. Treasure. Your natural selfishness makes the world a better place. Truly.
There's nothing better than people with problems hanging out with people that have zero problems and zero care or empathy for others. It shows weak and unfortunate people that this is possible. A chill existence, without a care in the world:thumbs up

[Borna]

I think people like you are a rare gift to humanity. Treasure. Your natural selfishness makes the world a better place. Truly.
There's nothing better than people with problems hanging out with people that have zero problems and zero care or empathy for others. It shows weak and unfortunate people that this is possible. A chill existence, without a care in the world:thumbs up

Considering sarcastic nature of nearly all of your posts, i don't know whether to thumb you up or down ;)

[The Illyrian Warrior]

I think people like you are a rare gift to humanity. Treasure. Your natural selfishness makes the world a better place. Truly.
There's nothing better than people with problems hanging out with people that have zero problems and zero care or empathy for others. It shows weak and unfortunate people that this is possible. A chill existence, without a care in the world:thumbs up

Shit, this post got a massive sarcastic dose in it. :D

[Drawing-slim]

Considering sarcastic nature of nearly all of your posts, i don't know whether to thumb you up or down ;)I mean it 100%:D

[Unome]

Lack of empathy, called "Apathy", signals psychopathic tendencies. Yes this is selfishness. But everybody has this tendency to some degree. It's very rare that a person truly cares about "all humanity". People tend to care about their own race, ethnic group (tribe), family first, etc. Most people care about themselves, as a rule, before others.

Selfishness is the default of nature. It's rarer that animals sacrifice themselves (Altruism) for their group. And animals generally do this under specific conditions (adult attempting to save the life of a child).


EDIT: However I wouldn't call this "morally bad/evil" in many circumstances. Christianity tends to label all selfishness as bad/evil though. So that moral judgement depends on the specific brand of faith.

[Equilibrium]

I don't care about your carelessness. :suomut:

[Longbowman]

I don't believe in bad people.

[Borna]

I don't care about your carelessness. :suomut:

I don't care about Nabatea, but i would like one more comic at least. :D

[Drawing-slim]

Shit, this post got a massive sarcastic dose in it. :DI stand by what I said to be true 100%. People like Viribus are the perfect neighbors and friends to have in life. They make the world a better place. A world filled with whiners and losers, with worriers drama kings & queens, unfortunates etc.
Being exposed daily to people genuinely detached to people's problems and the world problems I can't imagine a more positive presence.

[Borna]

I stand by what I said to be true 100%. People like Viribus are the perfect neighbors and friends to have in life. They make the world a better place. A world filled with whiners and losers, with worriers drama kings & queens, unfortunates etc.
Being exposed daily to people genuinely detached to people's problems and the world problems I can't imagine a more positive presence.

You sound like a good casino partner, notify me if you come somewhere near, i heard Montenegro is booming with Casinos. As we speak about it, yesterday i got a huge win, guy by me lost around 1500 euros, bent over roulette and started crying, since he said he loaned that money for his wedding. I could give him some share of it (He would probably use it to play again ) but i did not. Some of other gamblers felt sad about, how do you grief above guy who risked happiness of his own fiance and hurt her ?

[Equilibrium]

I don't care about Nabatea, but i would like one more comic at least. :D

I actually had the idea to make a Nabatea version of the famous This is Sparta! Last techno remix (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rvYZRskNV3w) titled "This is Nabba!".

I underestimated the effort that is required and gave up after making this gif, which I hadn't shared yet. :p Nothing else in work right now.

http://abload.de/img/proud-dance-final0ixia.gif

[The Illyrian Warrior]

I stand by what I said to be true 100%. People like Viribus are the perfect neighbors and friends to have in life. They make the world a better place. A world filled with whiners and losers, with worriers drama kings & queens, unfortunates etc.
Being exposed daily to people genuinely detached to people's problems and the world problems I can't imagine a more positive presence.

I'm afraid having people like Viribus I might turn into a individual with lack of empathy (:laugh:), and no, don't think this is good recipe to get yourself out of problems but more of a weakness to face daily problems which subsequently gets manifested with lack of empathy, as far the question goes if this turn you into bad person, depend how far this state goes, if extreme then definitely might kill off entire positive emotional feeling toward humanity hence turn you into cold blooded sociopath.

[Borna]

but more of a weakness to face daily problems

But what problems ? Others people problems? Why should i fight wars of others?

[Rudel]

I'm not empathetic, and never will be. No only can't I comprehend people being emotional and feel no need to connect, but it also irritates the heck out of me.
Which doesn't mean I relish people being hurt, but I certainly can't stand being required to give a shit on a personal level.

As for junkies and whatnot, they disgust me and I see them as a different species.

[Duke]

who the fuck cares?

[Drawing-slim]

You sound like a good casino partner, notify me if you come somewhere near, i heard Montenegro is booming with Casinos. As we speak about it, yesterday i got a huge win, guy by me lost around 1500 euros, bent over roulette and started crying, since he said he loaned that money for his wedding. I could give him some share of it (He would probably use it to play again ) but i did not. Some of other gamblers felt sad about, how do you grief above guy who risked happiness of his own fiance and hurt her ?
I don't quite understand the question but as far as gambling never feel bad whenever you win. It's so hard to win so you deserve the good feeling of winning.
I'm a lifetime gambler. I have had countless miserable nights/days Coming home broke during daylight morning hours while fresh people with good normal lives starting their day.
When you gamble you're taking a risk others are not, so you should enjoy it when you win regardless how painful it is for some others when they lose everything.

[Darth Revan]

Nah, don't worry about it.
There truly is no reason to worry about this. Remorse and guilt are useless and stupid.

[Duke]

I have developed system for rulette to always gain money by working out statistics, but its a slow process that bores me, so i dont gamble any more

I have bought my PC after one full night of rulette, and didn't spent a dime

[Borna]

Nah, don't worry about it.
There truly is no reason to worry about this. Remorse and guilt are useless and stupid.

I feel both remorse and guilt if i do something wrong. That is not what i am speaking about.



I have developed system for rulette to always gain money by working out statistics

Did it work ?

[Duke]

Did it work ?

yep

Casinos work on dumb people who go all or nothing, i had to watch my back and pace myself :D

[Darth Revan]

I feel both remorse and guilt if i do something wrong. That is not what i am speaking about.


You are questioning yourself about being a bad person, because of having no empathy. This is a tacit expression of something akin to guilt, maybe self-criticism?
What I'm saying is that you're living just fine, don't worry about it. Remorse for any reason is stupid and inefficient.

There truly is no reason to be altruistic at all, as the only thing that you will ever have, is your own self.

Good and bad are normative categories. They are only abstractions that have little to do with reality. Pointless to dwell on them.
The only question that really matters in truth is this: What can I/you do? or What can't I/you do?

[Drawing-slim]

I have developed system for rulette to always gain money by working out statistics, but its a slow process that bores me, so i dont gamble any more

I have bought my PC after one full night of rulette, and didn't spent a dime
Its the worst game to play. Any house game is bad for the long run. So I play none of them. I play only poker, the only way you can have a permanent lifetime edge as long as you play only a little better than the guy next to you.
One doesn't even have to be brilliantly good to make a living as long as you're better than some:p

[Linebacker]

Doesn't mean you are a bad person but rather a sociopath.Sociopaths aren't bad people,they are just people who need help.

[Duke]

Its the worst game to play. Any house game is bad for the long run. So I play none of them. I play only poker, the only way you can have a permanent lifetime edge as long as you play only a little better than the guy next to you.
One doesn't even have to be brilliantly good to make a living as long as you're better than some:p

its a myth, rullete is most safe game to play in, but it is not exciting.
I have prior to my trip to casino, tested the theory on online casino for free.

Ill give you a hint, a 5 euro win is a win, repeat a process 20 times, you you got 100 euros.

Thing is i could live of gambling that way, and earn my self a solid day check if i wonted to, but its not fun and boring

[Borna]

Its the worst game to play. Any house game is bad for the long run. So I play none of them. I play only poker, the only way you can have a permanent lifetime edge as long as you play only a little better than the guy next to you.
One doesn't even have to be brilliantly good to make a living as long as you're better than some:p

I don't gamble because of lifetime edge. I look on gambling as a hobby, i guess i like the adrenaline it provides.

[DarkSecret]

Lack of empathy only causes lack of social life or social exclusion.

[Borna]

Lack of empathy only causes lack of social life or social exclusion.

I am not social excluded, in fact, people just know that they don't speak to me about their problems because they know i don't care.
In my book that is a good thing.

[Dictator]

I do and do not lack empathy, I do not feel a true empathy but instead I emulate its characteristics because that's what they taught me to do when I was little. It's confusing.

[Dombra]

I have no troubles understanding others emotions. Most people claiming to be "caring" (most people in general) can bruise up emotionally at times when they consider something right and yet be clueless about someones feelings or intentions and remain self centered in other cases. I feel sympathy for even the worst of people if have the time but my initial outlook is more objective and I will stop caring most of the time. Others are very condemning if something does not fit their views of what is worth sympathy

If you are not doing any harm then I do not see what is "bad" with your behavior. I am sad though that I have to say that you suffer from psychopath or asperger traits if you actually are unable to put yourself into their emotions :sad: Are you good in maths and science?

[Stimpy]

A lack of empathy isn't something you can change about yourself and it's neither good nor bad IMO. As long as it's not in combination with sadistic tendencies.

I remember as a a child I was extremely empathetic however during puberty most of it disappeared. I think it might have something to do with testosterone or something. You also get desensitized by outside influences, of course.

[Drawing-slim]

its a myth, rullete is most safe game to play in, but it is not exciting.
I have prior to my trip to casino, tested the theory on online casino for free.

Ill give you a hint, a 5 euro win is a win, repeat a process 20 times, you you got 100 euros.

Thing is i could live of gambling that way, and earn my self a solid day check if i wonted to, but its not fun and boringBut you can't possibly have an edge on roulette because whatever bet you place the zero & double zero is for the house. That's 2 out of 37 numbers which is the closest best pay off 35 to 1 still a rip off to 37 to 1 to break even.
All other forms of bets on there are even less pay-outs based on your whatever wager.

[Duke]

But you can't possibly have an edge on roulette because whatever bet you place the zero & double zero is for the house. That's 2 out of 37 numbers which is the closest best pay off 35 to 1 still a rip off to 37 to 1 to break even.
All other forms of bets on there are even less pay-outs based on your whatever wager.

only way i can lose in the end is if i get really unlucky streak that is in chance of happening like winning a lottery jackpot
It can happen, but its a friking long shot.
I have made a system that makes "house always lose"

Roulette is best game to play with, because its easiest to work statistics, and you play against machine that always follows the same rules

[Highlands]

Asparagus syndrome

[Borna]

f you are not doing any harm then


If by harm you don't consider dissapointment people feel when i tell them i can't help them nor i want to bother with their problems, then i don't do any at all.



If you are not doing any harm then I do not see what is "bad" with your behavior. I am sad though that I have to say that you suffer from psychopath or asperger traits if you actually are unable to put yourself into their emotions :sad: Are you good in maths and science?


I guess i never tried. It looks like a nightmare to try and live someone else life. I am not, i am more oriented toward social sciences like history for example, or methodology, or law.


As long as it's not in combination with sadistic tendencies.

I can't be sadistic, since it would probably leave some impact on me, i am too selfish to impose such burden on me. I don't understand sadistic people, i think they lack the capability of imagining how it would be if someone tortured them. One of the reason why i never cheated any girlfriend, despite i wanted to it badly several times.

[Dombra]

If by harm you don't consider dissapointment people feel when i tell them i can't help them nor i want to bother with their problems, then i don't do any at all.


That is no "harm" :p Just because I understand their feelings does not not mean I care or even respect them. Your approach is probably the most useful in most situations


I guess i never tried. It looks like a nightmare to try and live someone else life. I am not, i am more oriented toward social sciences like history for example, or methodology, or law.


It is not hard, you do not even have to live their lives. Does it really sound so foreign to you? :confused:

Social sciences>Natural sciences :cool2:

[Borna]

I checked Asperger and i think you guys are wrong -


Individuals with AS experience difficulties in basic elements of social interaction, which may include a failure to develop friendships or to seek shared enjoyments or achievements with other

I don't face any difficulties in basic elements of interaction. And i do like to celebrate achivements of the people i know , i just don't like hearing their problems.

[Borna]

It is not hard, you do not even have to live their lives. Does it really sound so foreign to you?

Yes, but thinking about their problems , and possible solutions, requires me to pay deep devotion to their lives, examine their psyhical personality, at least if i want to do it properly. I am bit of perfectionist, i either do a thing completely, or don't do it at all. Most people expect at least some kind of advice of you, for me to give it, it means i have to spend some time thinking about it, that is the part i disslike.

[Sideritis]

I gave a thought and I concluded that you are a bit young(i,e need to go the hormonal change) and you should fall in love. If you are not emphatic than as well, than maybe there is something.

[Borna]

I gave a thought and I concluded that you are a bit young(i,e need to go the hormonal change) and you should fall in love. If you are not emphatic than as well, than maybe there is something.

I am 21, got 3 year old relationship, i guess i can say i fell in love.

I don't really feel i need any kind of help, just wanted to know your personal view on original question.

[Sideritis]

I am 21, got 3 year old relationship, i guess i can say i fell in love.

I don't really feel i need any kind of help, just wanted to know your personal view on original question.

I am not helping out, I am trying to figure. Anyways, I personally think that lack of empathy makes somehow a bad person. This world had much lack of empathy and the results are obvious.

[DarkSecret]

You don't have social problems. I have problems with emphaty and social life. I am better now but I used to be more like an asperger person. You don't have to be good at math or science. Asperger people are good at what they focus on. Because they can be so obsessed with any subject and that leads them to be so successful at this field. Though, you seem to be a self-confident, elite, careless person. That's just it. You don't need people to listen to your problems and you don't even have problems. You can't have. You are just so perfect to have problems so that you don't care or listen to people's problems.

[Incel King]

There's nothing strange about that. Humans are just selfish hedonistic animals, if you say I'm wrong then explain me why there's so many wars and agony on this world? Some people tell how humans are social beings and need to be surrounded by society in order to be happy, then those needs are selfish when in the end you need someone just because of yourself and your own feelings. It's not rocket science. :)

[Borna]

You don't need people to listen to your problems and you don't even have problems. You can't have. You are just so perfect to have problems so that you don't care or listen to people's problems.

You can say that my "problems" are pretty laughable to what other people are expiriencing. There is no way of telling that someone "can't have problems". And i am far from perfect, i am not self-delusional, i just think it is weak to display your problems to someone else, and expect to be heard. Guess it is reciprocity concept. After all, all problems you create (Not reffering to the "faith-games") you are obliged to solve by yourself, since you are the one caused them.

I realized my lack of empathy is selective. Guess that is selfishness.

[DarkSecret]

Even this thread is an example of your arrogance, you hate small people's small problems...

[DarkSecret]

You can say that my "problems" are pretty laughable to what other people are expiriencing. There is no way of telling that someone "can't have problems". And i am far from perfect, i am not self-delusional, i just think it is weak to display your problems to someone else, and expect to be heard. Guess it is reciprocity concept. After all, all problems you create (Not reffering to the "faith-games") you are obliged to solve by yourself, since you are the one caused them.

I realized my lack of empathy is selective. Guess that is selfishness.

Yes then you are so self-confident and see people so weak but remember that problems are not only created by ourselves.

[Borna]

Even this thread is an example of your arrogance, you hate small people's small problems...

No, i do not "hate" it. It would be pretty stupid if you hated someone because of his problems. I just don't like listening to it, since i do not want to impose any kind of burden on myself, i would just like to remain neutral, not to help them, but not to make it harder for them as well.


P.S - Am i reading civilized discussion about interesting matter on apricity :D ?

[DarkSecret]

I suggest you to join some voluntary projects.

[Borna]

Yes then you are so self-confident and see people so weak but remember that problems are not only created by ourselves.

This has nothing to do with self-confidence, you are way off. I agree on the second.

[Borna]

I suggest you to join some voluntary projects.

Why ? As i said, i don't feel bad about this, i just wanted to know what other people think about it.

[Neanderthal]

I wouldn't confuse lack of empathy with indifference.

I'd also be indifferent to some drug user who wrecks up his/her life.

[Atvend]

Doesn't seem like you are describing empathy in your original post, empathy means to be able to understand someone even though you may not have had similar experiences in life. Either way I think you are alright, most people are like this. It's just that some "holier than thou" types convince themselves or are indoctrinated into believing they care about the sorrows of others, but they don't, at least not to a large extent.

[Loki]

It could be that i lived my whole life absent of problems, in well suited family , got everything i wanted, never really faced any life problems until recent times.
But my sister had same life, how come she is so different ? Though her altruistic character only caused problems for her (People she helped were rarely there for herself).

If you lack empathy you lack humanity. Self-absorbed. Selfish. Altruism is far superior and worthy, problems or not.

[DarkSecret]

Why ? As i said, i don't feel bad about this, i just wanted to know what other people think about it.

I know you don't feel bad about this. For me that's not a nice thing. So you need to gain some emphaty and helpfulness. That's why I thought that would be better. Though, if you don't care that you don't care anyone so be it.

[Neanderthal]

If you lack empathy you lack humanity. Self-absorbed. Selfish. Altruism is far superior and worthy, problems or not.

To me altruism is nothing but egoism, ironically.

And true empathy also has selfish undertones, as in getting identified with someone that displays or reflects some traits that trigger your so called humanity.

[Unome]

Difference between psychopathy & sociopathy:

http://www.medicaldaily.com/whats-difference-between-sociopath-and-psychopath-not-much-one-might-kill-you-270694


What is the Difference?

Psychologists tend to break down the two groups by certain factors, and they have a lot in common. Both tend to be charming, despite being unable to empathize normally with others. They offer convincing systems of fear and disgust, but tend to lack both. Here’s the crux, though: Psychopaths cross the line. Sociopaths may hole up in their houses and remove themselves from society, while a psychopath is busy in his basement rigging shackles to his furnace.

Psychopaths are dangerous. They’re violent and cruel, and oftentimes downright sinister. They show no remorse for their actions, usually because of a lesion on a part of their brain responsible for fear and judgment, known as the amygdala. Psychopaths commit crimes in cold blood. They crave control and impulsivity, possess a predatory instinct, and attack proactively rather than as a reaction to confrontation: A 2002 study found that 93.3 percent of the psychopathic homicides were instrumental in nature (meaning they were more or less planned), compared with 48.4 percent of the homicides by people who weren’t psychopaths.

Sociopaths are a different breed. They, too, may suffer from their mental illness as a result of lesioned brain regions. Upbringing may also play a larger role in a child becoming a sociopath versus those that are diagnosed as psychopaths, or the slide into dementia on the other end of the spectrum. Sociopathic behavior is manifested as conniving and deceitful, despite an outward appearance of trustworthiness or sincerity. Sociopaths are often pathological liars. They are manipulative and lack the ability to judge the morality of a situation, but not because they lack a moral compass; rather, their existing moral compass is greatly (yet not always dangerously) skewed. Pemment, for one, says this could point to both a social and neurological component.

“There are neurological correlates for how beliefs could promote specific kinds of attitudinal or behavioral moral outcomes,” he wrote. “These correlates provide a basis for studying how beliefs create our moral integrity by affecting our empathy circuit. However, a large component of sociopathy involves antisocial behavior, and I am unaware of any neurological study that ties beliefs to antisocial behavior.”

This means that while psychopathy and sociopathy both likely involve impaired cognitive function, the two differ in which circuits are affected. Psychopaths are fearless; sociopaths aren’t. Psychopaths don’t have a sense of right and wrong; sociopaths do. But both are equally capable of ruining lives and destroying relationships — not that they care.
There is debate about the differences between psycho/socio-pathy.

And I have a solution. Psychopaths lack empathy. Sociopaths are too empathetic and choose to self-seclude or escape from society as a result. It's not about anti-social behavior per se. It requires context. And understanding empathy is the key.

Sociopaths are manipulative in the sense of requiring social approval. Psychopaths neither require nor want social approval. That's a key difference between the two.


So again I claim: psychopaths lack empathy for others, or simply misread people's emotional reactions to social behaviors/contrivances. Sociopaths are too empathetic, and too concerned what others think.

[Duke]

To me altruism is nothing but egoism, ironically.

And true empathy also has selfish undertones, as in getting identified with someone that displays or reflects some traits that trigger your so called humanity.

yes, altruism is egoism, so what?

it seems you approve only one kind of egoism.

I believe in helping people, and especially making people around me better, and that is egoistic, however, it makes me happier :D

[Herr Abubu]

What makes a good person is the knowledge of what is right and what is wrong and the will to act accordingly, i.e., knowing principle and acting on it. Feelings are only valid when they are in accordance with principle. Personally, I am not so much empathetic as I am sympathetic, and I am very selective in my sympathies. I have little to no sympathy for miserable people who are miserable because of things they are entirely in charge of, "inferior" behaviour. I have neither empathy nor sympathy for Borrebies. You seem to know the difference between good and bad and seem to know to act accordingly, so you are not a bad person.

[Neanderthal]

I'm waiting for any hypocrite to say he feels empathy towards everyone in the world to tell me what does it feel not being able to sleep at night crying over some nigger kids dying of starvation in some third world shithole.

Empathy is very selective, because it steam from the bullshit ethos we have in our minds. And the reward we get after doing something 'altruistic' is so big for our egos, that is almost like a feel good drug.

[Borna]

They’re violent and cruel, and oftentimes downright sinister. They show no remorse for their actions,

I never was violent in my life, let alone cruel. I use all the positive emotions for the short circle of people, and feel indifferent toward others.


I wouldn't confuse lack of empathy with indifference.

I think this is most useful post in this thread.

[Loki]

To me altruism is nothing but egoism, ironically.


How so? That sounds contradictory.

[Duke]

being indifferent, and not involved, makes you invisible, and unremarkable

[Herr Abubu]

To me altruism is nothing but egoism, ironically.

I would not exactly say that. It is just that so many so-called altruists, some also call them leftists, only pretend to be altruistic so they can tell themselves and be told by others that they are such good, selfless individuals.


And true empathy also has selfish undertones, as in getting identified with someone that displays or reflects some traits that trigger your so called humanity.

Exactly, which is why sympathy is far superior to empathy.

[Ivan Kramskoï]

Not necessarly.
I mean, when I was younger I used to lack of empathy. I have more empathy now.
It correllates with a hypermasculine brain structure.

[Borna]

I'm waiting for any hypocrite to say he feels empathy towards everyone in the world to tell me what does it feel not being able to sleep at night crying over some nigger kids dying of starvation in some third world shithole.

:rofl:


How so? That sounds contradictory.

You help others because it makes you feel good. That can be considered selfish.

[Duke]

Not necessarly.
I mean, when I was younger I used to lack of empathy. I have more empathy now.
It correllates with a hypermasculine brain structure.

lack of empathy correlates with hipermasculine?

if you are saying that, i can make a good argument against that

[Loki]

You help others because it makes you feel good. That can be considered selfish.

Not at all. Why do you think so? It doesn't make me feel good or bad. I am not out to impress anyone since I don't even believe in God.

[Loki]

i just wanted to know what other people think about it.

I agree with BlondeSalad (http://www.theapricity.com/forum/showthread.php?159015-Lack-of-Empathy-Bad-person&p=3373750&viewfull=1#post3373750).

[Borna]

Not at all. Why do you think so? It doesn't make me feel good or bad. I am not out to impress anyone since I don't even believe in God.

That was just an basic argument about altruism. You never felt like a good person when you helped someone ? I don't believe in God as well.

[Neanderthal]

yes, altruism is egoism, so what?

it seems you approve only one kind of egoism.

I believe in helping people, and especially making people around me better, and that is egoistic, however, it makes me happier :D

I'm all for charity and compassion, but we should not disguise it as dignifying and pure. Like we do with work for example. And, more importantly, we should not make of compassion a social institution, like we do nowadays with welfare, for example.

[Duke]

I'm all for charity and compassion, but we should not disguise it as dignifying and pure. Like we do with work for example. And, more importantly, we should not make of compassion a social institution, like we do nowadays with welfare, for example.

i am not talking about charity, but having empathy.
Having empathy does not make you a good person by default, you can be some sick sadist killer that enjoys other people pain as well, you can use it to manipulate people as well if you can recognize what they emotionally wont.

[Breedingvariety]

Even this thread is an example of your arrogance, you hate small people's small problems...
Diagnosis- arrogance.

[Borna]

Diagnosis- arrogance.

I do not consider myself arrogant.

[Neanderthal]

i am not talking about charity, but having empathy.
Having empathy does not make you a good person by default, you can be some sick sadist killer that enjoys other people pain as well, you can use it to manipulate people as well if you can recognize what they emotionally wont.


I believe in helping people, and especially making people around me better, and that is egoistic, however, it makes me happier

For me that's compassion. Like when a fat bitch starts ranting how fat and ugly she think she is, and you go on and say 'oh, no come on, we all come in different sizes', and we can transpose this to any other form of 'empathy'.

For me empathy is being compassionate towards a condition or disadvantage. No wonder for example, leftist can't feel empathy towards capitalists, and they want to murder plutocrats as they did with french nobility, because capital people are not in disadvantage but in power.

[Duke]

For me that's compassion. Like when a fat bitch starts ranting how fat and ugly she think she is, and you go on and say 'oh, no come on, we all come in different sizes', and we can transpose this to any other form of 'empathy'.

For me empathy is being compassionate towards a condition or disadvantage. No wonder for example, leftist can't feel empathy towards capitalists, and they want to murder plutocrats as they did with french nobility, because capital people are not in disadvantage but in power.

compassion can give you allies, so i find it valuable, also types of leftist who would like to kill capitalists wont to be like them in teh future.

Its more about complexes with those leftists, you know that french revolutionaries appointed them selves as basically nobility after they won

[Breedingvariety]

To me altruism is nothing but egoism, ironically.

And true empathy also has selfish undertones, as in getting identified with someone that displays or reflects some traits that trigger your so called humanity.
Then somebody helping others is as selfish and valuable as somebody torturing others.

[Duke]

Then somebody helping others is as selfish and valuable as somebody torturing others.

it is, but the difference is negative or positive selfishness

destructive vs creative

[Breedingvariety]

And I have a solution. Psychopaths lack empathy. Sociopaths are too empathetic and choose to self-seclude or escape from society as a result. It's not about anti-social behavior per se. It requires context. And understanding empathy is the key.

Sociopaths are manipulative in the sense of requiring social approval. Psychopaths neither require nor want social approval. That's a key difference between the two.

So again I claim: psychopaths lack empathy for others, or simply misread people's emotional reactions to social behaviors/contrivances. Sociopaths are too empathetic, and too concerned what others think.
Not only are you way off, but you also contradict yourself. How can one gain social approval and be secluded at the same time? He can't. Sociopaths seek social approval only to the extent of achieving dominance over others and only to the extent of how much they can get from their approval. If sociopath doesn't see gain in somebodies approval, not only he doesn't care about his approval, he even becomes abusive to that person. Both sociopath and psychopath lack empathy equally. The difference is, sociopaths are more calculating and socially aware so their abuse of people is more subtle trying to avoid negative consequences to their reputation. Psychopaths are reckless and will do anything their compulsion drives them to do with little regard to consequences. Sociopath climbs carrier ladder over people by any means necessary. Psychopath just commits crime and lands himself in jail.

[Unome]

Not only are you way off, but you also contradict yourself. How can one gain social approval and be secluded at the same time? He can't. Sociopaths seek social approval only to the extent of achieving dominance over others and only to the extent of how much they can get from their approval. If sociopath doesn't see gain in somebodies approval, not only he doesn't care about his approval, he even becomes abusive to that person. Both sociopath and psychopath lack empathy equally. The difference is, sociopaths are more calculating and socially aware so their abuse of people is more subtle trying to avoid negative consequences to their reputation. Psychopaths are reckless and will do anything their compulsion drives them to do with little regard to consequences. Sociopath climbs carrier ladder over people by any means necessary. Psychopath just commits crime and lands himself in jail.
Psychopaths tend to physically force others and commit obviously violent acts.

Sociopaths are more into subtle, subversive forms of manipulation.


For example I would point to Hitler as a sociopath, not a psychopath. His madness was not psychological, but sociological. He tapped into a whole nation of people. That's sociopathic. Psychopaths tend to focus on themselves in extreme selfishness, and after a point, completely become unaware/ignorant to other people's feelings and emotions. Psychopaths also have a tendency to want to torture others physically. I would liken that compulsion to a predator-prey relationship, feeding on another person like vampirism.

[Neanderthal]

Unome, I think you are confusing sociopathy with asociality.

Asocial people require almost no degree of social stimulus, be recognition or whatever; whereas sociopaths and even psychopaths do, they just, as Breedingvariety says, go on extreme lengths to harness that recognition. Hence many serial killers actually want to be caught, just to be recognized as proficient killers.

Personally I consider myself asocial. I love individuals, I love interacting with subjects, but the collective consciousness I loathe. For me the collective is nothing but a bunch of imbecile beasts, be it from any side of the ideological and political spectrum.

Collective assassinates subjects.

And this is very off-topic lol

[DebtCollector]

How does this make you feel, edgelord?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADjCh3j4Z2k

[Casandrinos]

I wish I was like you. It affects me a lot if something bad happen to a person I know. Especially when I can't help.

[StormBringer]

Maybe it's just that you've spent a lot of time on white nationalism sites where junkies are seen as white scum that needs to be rid of. xD

http://www.blic.rs/data/images/2012-08-08/265496_peranovic-02-foto-blic-milos-cvetkovic_f.jpg?ver=1358368624

[Borna]

Maybe it's just that you've spent a lot of time on white nationalism sites where junkies are seen as white scum that needs to be rid of. xD

http://www.blic.rs/data/images/2012-08-08/265496_peranovic-02-foto-blic-milos-cvetkovic_f.jpg?ver=1358368624

No, it is not regarded with my political beliefs.