Sexual harassment of female users is against the rules,

[Sikeliot]

and will not be tolerated. There has been a situation here where a new female user posted her photos (none of which, for the record were inappropriate in any way) and several male members inundated the thread with crude sexual comments, and have driven her off the forum. This is unacceptable.

The rule of thumb should be, if you would not make the comment to a random woman you didn't know in public, or if you wouldn't say it to one of your coworkers, then you should NOT say it on here to a female user unless there is a consensual sexual relationship between the two and such comments are mutual and received positively.

If you would say crude sexual comments to women you do not know or to your coworkers and it is not mutual or welcomed, then you have an issue and should not be on here in the first place.

This is unacceptable and will not be tolerated. GROW UP!

[Ali Pasha]

What about sexual harassment against men? These chicks cant keep their hands off me.

[Sikeliot]

What about sexual harassment against men?

I haven't seen it occur on here, and if it does and a male user complains then the same applies. Either way, I want you to read the post above as many times as it takes for it to sink in, because your own behavior is completely out of line.

[щрбл]

NatiaCutie, I command you to leave this body in the name of Jesus!

[Grenzland]

Who left because of that?

[Sikeliot]

Who left because of that?

It was a new user who didn't make many posts as of that point.

[Grenzland]

Well NatiaCutie would be useful as mod right now. She would annoy the hell out of every harasser with her feminism, they all would leave. :D

[Bezprym]

Who left, or not, is irrelevant.

[Anthony PV]

@Sikeliot: since you're the admin of this forum, you make the rules and I won't protest them. But still... Here's an interesting excerpt from an interview one of your compatriots, Italian-American feminist Camille Paglia, made to Playboy magazine that is applicable to this situation:


PLAYBOY: Is that why you've been so critical about the growing number of sexual harassment cases?

PAGLIA: Yes, though I believe in moderate sexual harassment guidelines. But you can't the Stalinist situation we have in America right now, where any neurotic woman can make any stupid charge and destroy a man's reputation. If there is evidence of false accusation, the accuser should be expelled. Similarly, a woman who falsely accuses a man of rape should be sent to jail. My definition of sexual harassment is specific. It is only sexual harassment--by a man or a woman--if it is quid pro quo. That is, if someone says, "You must do this or I'm going to do that"--for instance, fire you. And whereas touching is sexual harassment, speech is not. I am militant on this. Words must remain free. The solution to speech is that women must signal the level of their tolerance--women are all different. Some are very bawdy.

PLAYBOY: What, about women who are easily offended and too scared or intimidated to speak up?

PAGLIA: Too bad. You must develop the verbal tools to counter offensive language. That's life. Feminism has created a privileged, white middle class of girls who claim they're victims because they want to preserve their bourgeois decorum and passivity.

PLAYBOY: You're expecting girls to stand up for themselves in a culture that discourages them from doing just that?

PAGLIA: That's right. We must examine the degree to which we coddle middle-class girls. There is something sick about it. The girls I see on campuses are often innocuous, with completely homogenized personalities, miserable, anorexic and bulimic. The feminist movement teaches them that it's men's fault, but it isn't. These girls go out into the world as heiresses of all the affluence in the universe. They are the most pampered and most affluent girls on the globe. So stop complaining about men. You're getting all the rewards that come with the nice-girl persona you've chosen. When you get into trouble and you're batting your eyes and someone is offending you and you are too nice to deal with it, that's a choice. Assess your persona. Realize the degree to which your niceness may invoke people to say lewd and pornographic things to you--sometimes to violate your niceness. The more you blush, the more people want to do it. Understand your part of it and learn to parry. Sex talk is a game. The girls in the Sixties loved it. If you don't want some professor to call you honey, tell him.


[ Playboy interview, May 1995: Camille Paglia.]

[Sikeliot]

I understand that but the point is that when the behavior is taking place here on the internet and is making female users feel uncomfortable such that they want to leave the forum, those of us who are in charge here need to make it clear that such behavior is unacceptable and will not be tolerated.

[Grenzland]

I like this announcement.

Sexual harassment is against the rules? Really, that surprises me so hard. :lol:

I'm curious how hard this "new" law will be enforced. Harlekin annoys everyone when Itarildë posts a picture of her. Doesn't seem to be harassment because only his posts are deleted but he is still there. :)

[Bezprym]

I'm curious how hard this "new" law will be enforced. Harlekin annoys everyone when Itarildë posts a picture of her. Doesn't seem to be because only his posts are deleted but he is still there. :)

I hope that red nickname is not a reason.

[Nurzat]

I compliment girls here a lot and asked many Apricity girls to marry me


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_426RiwST8

[Sikeliot]

I like this announcement.

Sexual harassment is against the rules? Really, that surprises me so hard. :lol:

I'm curious how hard this "new" law will be enforced. Harlekin annoys everyone when Itarildë posts a picture of her. Doesn't seem to be because only his posts are deleted but he is still there. :)

It is not a new rule; I just didn't realize it was not common sense until now...

Anyway, the fact of the matter will be if it is happening we will tell the user to stop, and they will be expected to listen.

[Bezprym]

I compliment girls here a lot and asked many Apricity girls to marry me


What is wrong in compliments? Don't be paranoid. :)

[Dandelion]

I'm afraid that if the female is driven off and the harasser left unpunished this warning (regardless of whether it ever gets read by those addressed) will result in nothing.

[Profileid]

This is stupid. If she didn't like the comments she could've just ignored them.

[Bezprym]

This is stupid. If she didn't like the comments she could've just ignored them.

Ok. Try to register in a forum and first responses you will get are "cum 2 mai bed, letz meik childs". Have fun out there.

[Profileid]

Ok. Try to register in a forum and first responses you will get are "cum 2 mai bed, letz meik childs". Have fun out there.

I would probably just laugh and move on. I understand this is to keep new users from leaving, but I don't see how you can be sexually harassed online.

[Bezprym]

I would probably just laugh and move on. I understand this is to keep new users from leaving, but I don't see how you can be sexually harassed online.

I'd say it is more about simply sexual comments towards users, especially new ones, who are not acquinted with the barbaric behaviour of morons existing here.

[Raikaswinþs]

I understand that but the point is that when the behavior is taking place here on the internet and is making female users feel uncomfortable such that they want to leave the forum, those of us who are in charge here need to make it clear that such behavior is unacceptable and will not be tolerated.

how is crude sexual remarks towards a female user unacceptable but crude sexual/racial/personal/religious/body shaming/ phenotype shaming/haplogroup shaming etc etc. against male users is not only not moderated but tacitly encouraged under the "freedom of expression" pretest.

What's with the double standard? Also, please don't belittle the word "harrassment" by associating it with "crude sexual remarks" in a troll forum. Because then almost every interaction in this forum can be described as harassment. Then how would you described the actual doxxing, defamating, character assessination , revealing of personal info and ciberstalking that many people have actually suffered?

IF that girl can't take the banter that comes with this forum it is good that she went in look for a safer space... many of us would like more active moderation , namely to elevate the quality of the discussion, but moderation must apply regardless of who is being "trolled".

If there's freedom of expression (and therefore of trolling), then there's freedom for all.


Of course I will support banning and even prosecuting anyone who would actually would cyber-harass her. But let's not treat women like overgrown children ok?

[Bezprym]

many of us would like more active moderation , namely to elevate the quality of the discussion, but moderation must apply regardless of who is being "trolled".


True.

[Unome]

What if the remarks lead to making babies??

[Sikeliot]

This is not up for debate... can we act like mature, responsible adults with manners please? Thanks.

[BeerBaron]

Everyone is harassed in one form or another, why is it that women are getting special treatment, especially when they can just change their gender tag and be done with it?

[Guapo]

This is not up for debate... can we act like mature, responsible adults with manners please? Thanks.

How was she harassed??

[Bezprym]

This is not up for debate... can we act like mature, responsible adults with manners please? Thanks.

I think that part of Caxtiltēcatl's post I quoted is worth of debate.

[Desaix DeBurgh]

and will not be tolerated. There has been a situation here where a new female user posted her photos (none of which, for the record were inappropriate in any way) and several male members inundated the thread with crude sexual comments, and have driven her off the forum. This is unacceptable.

The rule of thumb should be, if you would not make the comment to a random woman you didn't know in public, or if you wouldn't say it to one of your coworkers, then you should NOT say it on here to a female user unless there is a consensual sexual relationship between the two and such comments are mutual and received positively.

If you would say crude sexual comments to women you do not know or to your coworkers and it is not mutual or welcomed, then you have an issue and should not be on here in the first place.

This is unacceptable and will not be tolerated. GROW UP!

Work atmosphere and public atmosphere are different. A guy can say alot more things to a woman at like a bar or on the street than he can at work. I didn't realize we were being payed for posting here. It is nice to know because I will send my paycheck to some charity or something. Anyway, so around what date might I be expecting this paycheck (so that I make arrangements with my favorite charity) ?

[Oneeye]

Was it the Italian chick? I thought "sexual harassment" was part of their culture?

[Graham]

How was she harassed??

I blame Guapo. The Quagmire of Apricity.

[Guapo]

I blame Guapo. The Quagmire of Apricity.

I know who he is referring to. I didnt harass her. I even spoke italian with her. She was meh looking.

[Guapo]

Was it the Italian chick? I thought "sexual harassment" was part of their culture?

the meds here were harassing her

[BeerBaron]

Was it the Italian chick? I thought "sexual harassment" was part of their culture?

:rofl: you kill me cyclops :rofl:

[Desaix DeBurgh]

Was it the Italian chick? I thought "sexual harassment" was part of their culture?

Sexual harassment doesn't exist like outside the employer/work environment or academic institutions like colleges/universities . The idea that sexual harassment can occur outside of these environments is like some kind of mentally deficient joke. You guys are obviously far from lawyers or legal scholars. Although, since Loki owns this place, like a bar owner, it is his right to kick people out of his establishment (for saying things he doesn't like) but if a bar went around kicking people out for such comments they would have alot less customers if you get my analogy. I dunno maybe things are different in Europe than they are in America in regards to that.

[Desaix DeBurgh]

Everyone is harassed in one form or another, why is it that women are getting special treatment, especially when they can just change their gender tag and be done with it?

http://cdn.meme.am/instances/500x/63458881.jpg

http://memecrunch.com/meme/CRAU/old-gregg-mangina/image.jpg

[Oneeye]

Sexual harassment doesn't exist like outside the employer/work environment or academic institutions like colleges/universities . The idea that sexual harassment can occur outside of these environments is like some kind of mentally deficient joke. You guys are obviously far from lawyers or legal scholars. Although, since Loki owns this place, like a bar owner, it is his right to kick people out of his establishment (for saying things he doesn't like) but if a bar went around kicking people out for such comments they would have alot less customers if you get my analogy. I dunno maybe things are different in Europe than they are in America in regards to that.

Obviously employment laws are not in effect here.


In a bar, there are physical cues as to how receptive a woman or man is to flirting. If women are leaving because of what a man is saying to them, you can bet that they would give less of a fuck about the man remaining a patron than if he is scaring off other potential customers that BRING in the others. Ever heard of ladies' night? They want women to come, They want women to stay. They want women to get you to buy them and yourself more drinks. Besides that, if you give a woman grief at a bar, chances are that you will be confronted by someone else in there and probably get your ass kicked. Hell, you may get in a fight just for looking at a taken woman too intently.


Too many socially retarded people wondering why they can't say whatever without off-putting others. xD I have no idea what was said to her, but she obviously decided that it wasn't worth sticking around afterwards. It makes sense to nip lewd behavior in the bud if it turns into a pattern of scaring off the ladies.

[Mortimer]

thanks sikeliot fully agree with the new rule

[Peter Nirsch]

Is sexual harassment of males allowed? :)

[Sikeliot]

Put it this way, if a woman does not want crude comments being made to her, don't make them. Find someone who enjoys the attention and leave the others alone.

[Thordis]

In light of recent events, we will have to post a reminder to this rule. Some female members felt uneasy or even left the forum as a result of inappropriate behavior towards them. While the Apricity is a very tolerant forum, certain things are not acceptable even here. Indecent, lewd behavior, exhibitionism, vulgarity, unsolicited advances, sexual remarks towards other users... this has been going too far. It appears that some are under the impression that such language and conduct belongs to the daily Apricity bill of fare, or is somehow justifiable/excusable because it is the Internet. Well, no. A minimal sense of decency is not really a lot to ask. Staff can and will take action if we encounter any of the following:

- unsolicited (sexual) advances, be they public or private. While relationships have been formed online, including on forums such as this one, there is a substantial difference between mutual, consensual romance/flirting and uninvited, ostentatious sexual comments. Usually, if someone is interested, it will be obvious - they will either let you know, or give you specific hints. If in doubt though, simply assume they are not. Also, do not confuse friendliness or politeness with availability. Some people - especially young women - may not be comfortable with being blunt or confrontational about their lack of interest. They may be afraid of hurting other people's feelings or self-esteem, or feel intimidated by the advances. If you receive the silent treatment, it's probably one of those cases. Recurring and aggressive unsolicited advances, especially after the other person has made it clear they want to be left alone, shall be counted as harassment.

- sending of unsolicited nudes. Whether it is of genitals or other private body parts, this is absolutely unacceptable. If someone were to walk up to someone else on the street or in a public place, and randomly flash them, they would be arrested and charged with indecent exposure, at the very least. Doing it online is no more tolerable. Nor is it smart for that matter. Your messages may end up cited, shared, forwarded or reported by the recipient. We may not be held liable nor provide assistance for any consequences you suffer as a result of sending such photos. If you engage in such behavior, it's at your own risk.

- public comments of lewd or sexual nature directed at other members. I've had to delete about a dozen of them, and that was only the other day. It doesn't matter whether they are male, female, straight, gay, etc. Just because someone posts a pretty picture or makes a friendly comment does not mean they want that kind of attention. Also, there is a difference between making a nice, polite, flattering comment and being sexually aggressive, vulgar or creepy. The latter has the potential to scare young female members away and we don't want to have that kind of reputation.

- comments about raping other members - also unacceptable, even as "jokes". You might think it's funny, but not everyone shares the same mentality.

- vulgar or obscene comments directed at members' families. This is rude and downright disrespectful. We aren't in a ghetto.

- posting of pornographic/sexually graphic content outside of the Apricity Orgy. This goes for both visual as well as written content.

- posting of an overwhelming amount of threads pertaining to matters of sexuality, made in a repetitive, lowbrow and trollish manner, as well as derailing unrelated threads with such topics.

If you've been on the receiving end, there are several ways to deal with this. Placing the culprit on ignore will lead to their private messages, visitor messages and reputation comments being blocked/hidden from view. You can also report the instance to staff, or message a moderator or administrator about it. Remember that the staff cannot always read everything, as there are thousands of posts submitted per day, so we rely on your help with reporting such occurrences.

Let's work on keeping the forum and discussion level decent and civilized. Thank you.

[♥ Lily ♥]

thanks sikeliot fully agree with the new rule

'New rule'?!? :confused: :picard1:

I can see that this thread was made in 2015 - which was before you aggressively sent me unwanted images of your exposed penis and arse with statements written to suck your dick, etc, during an argument. I wasn't a mod at the time and I didn't report it and stayed silent at the time as part of me pitied you due to your illness, even though I felt shocked and disappointed and upset.

This rule was made before you made FinnishSwede leave after harassing her. And before you made a thread about a Serbian poster without her consent the other week (which she asked me to remove,) and before you publicly exhibited your arse as an attention seeker in one of your threads last week.