PDA

View Full Version : Are inter-ethnic sexual relationships easier to make than inter-ethnic friendships?



Tooting Carmen
03-19-2024, 12:49 PM
At least some of the time. The point about sexual relationships is that they in large measure revolve around, well, sex and physical attraction. By contrast, it is friendships that are much more contingent on shared values, language, culture, interests etc.

I have noticed this myself throughout the years. Plenty of British and American men marry Latina women, but those men often don't get on especially with Latino men. This doesn't necessarily only apply to inter-racial scenarios either. It can also apply to same race but different nationality scenarios. For example, dreadful series though Emily In Paris indeed was, one of the more perceptive elements of it was how it was the men who liked the eponymous star, and it was the women who didn't because they found her culture and values very alien.

Östsvensk
03-20-2024, 03:23 PM
Interethnic (and interracial) friendships are way more common than interethnic relationships.

Incal
03-20-2024, 04:21 PM
I'd say they are inter-necessity relationships than inter-ethnic proper. Anglo men can't hit it in their homelands and latina women look for the easy way out (green card).

tropicalslavic
03-20-2024, 04:30 PM
This is definitely an interesting question.

I think that casual sex relationships are probably easiest out of all of these. I mean, if you're into that sort of thing, who gives a shit what the cultural values and nuances of the other person are. Not like you're gonna be around each other long enough to find out.

I think it depends on the cultures in the context of romantic relationships. My husband is American and I'm Eastern European. Neither of us imagined there being a huge culture clash here, but there has been at times. I genuinely cannot wrap my head around certain things that are normal to him as an American to this day. He doesn't get some of my weird Eastern European things. None of it is major stuff at all, but I do think your cultural upbringing and how it makes you different from your partner comes out a lot more after you are in a committed relationship and actually living together. Both of us have learned that certain things from our own cultures make less sense, and that the other's culture has a better idea of those things (for example he's learned that shoes inside of the house are disgusting and I've learned that it's wasteful and unnecessary to show up with a gift every time you visit someone).

At that point it becomes about how big the differences are, what the differences pertain to, how willing the people are to see where the other is coming from, etc.

Almost none of my friends are Eastern Europeans, I spend most of my time with Americans in real life these days. There are parts of my personality that have to get turned down around them. Those same parts of my personality shine bright around other Eastern Europeans, but I'm uncomfortable with the Eastern Europeans in a way that I'm not uncomfortable with Americans. Friendships are overall easier because you don't have to spend every day of your life with the person, sleeping in the same bed, hanging out in the same house, raising kids, eating meals, etc. and seeing how much all of the little differences add up.

Just my 2c.

Mortimer
03-20-2024, 04:42 PM
This is definitely an interesting question.

I think that casual sex relationships are probably easiest out of all of these. I mean, if you're into that sort of thing, who gives a shit what the cultural values and nuances of the other person are. Not like you're gonna be around each other long enough to find out.

I think it depends on the cultures in the context of romantic relationships. My husband is American and I'm Eastern European. Neither of us imagined there being a huge culture clash here, but there has been at times. I genuinely cannot wrap my head around certain things that are normal to him as an American to this day. He doesn't get some of my weird Eastern European things. None of it is major stuff at all, but I do think your cultural upbringing and how it makes you different from your partner comes out a lot more after you are in a committed relationship and actually living together. Both of us have learned that certain things from our own cultures make less sense, and that the other's culture has a better idea of those things (for example he's learned that shoes inside of the house are disgusting and I've learned that it's wasteful and unnecessary to show up with a gift every time you visit someone).

At that point it becomes about how big the differences are, what the differences pertain to, how willing the people are to see where the other is coming from, etc.

Almost none of my friends are Eastern Europeans, I spend most of my time with Americans in real life these days. There are parts of my personality that have to get turned down around them. Those same parts of my personality shine bright around other Eastern Europeans, but I'm uncomfortable with the Eastern Europeans in a way that I'm not uncomfortable with Americans. Friendships are overall easier because you don't have to spend every day of your life with the person, sleeping in the same bed, hanging out in the same house, raising kids, eating meals, etc. and seeing how much all of the little differences add up.

Just my 2c.

Indeed interesting question Tooting raised and you gave a good answer

Oghuz
03-20-2024, 05:32 PM
Whatever is available for whatever is required.

cicliste
03-23-2024, 08:44 PM
I did a double-take because you raise a really interesting point. I have to admit, although I am just a normal tall white guy, I have always been really really attracted to petite Asian girls. And I have dated quite a few. But it wouldn't be realistic to become friends with them ... they don't like the same music or thing about the same things. Sorry if that's in any way offensive. I'm just being honest.