Waidewut
03-21-2012, 02:58 PM
I noticed one of these kind of joke-lists about what are the requirement to be certain you are a Greek, and because these kind of generalization jokes are very popular here too, I'll post some. :D
1. you try to prove everyone that Latvia is in Northern Europe, not Eastern
2. tall blonde beauties in short skirts are nothing special for you anymore
3. you specify ‘no gas’ when asking for mineral water.
4. every year in the end of June you go to countryside with friends to have some beer and eat some cheese
5. you get used to explain abroad where Latvia is
6. you get shocked if somebody abroad does know where Latvia is.
7. you are proud that Latvian Lat is the most expensive currency
8. the phrase “go to seaside” means for you 15-20 minutes by car
9. ice hockey has become the most important thing in your life
10. half of the population working as “managers” seems reasonable to you
11. half of your friends disappear to study or work in Ireland or UK and you think that’s normal
12. you’ve learned the hard way that a triangle means women’s toilet and a triangle upside down means men’s
13. anything goes wrong you blame the Russians
14. anything goes wrong you blame the Latvians
15. you think hot chocolate means melted chocolate and you love it
16. you see someone smiling in public, you think: well, a bloody foreigner
17. a meal for you must contain either potato or meat, but usually both
18. you are afraid crossing a street, especially at zebra crossings or traffic lights
19. you feel guilty entering a flat wearing your shoes
20. everything 50m above sea-level seems like a mountain
21. you start counting the ground floor as first floor
22. you love the Baltic Sea and go swimming there at nearly any temperature
23. you love going to the Sauna, but always leave your trunks/bikini on
24. you consider Latvia the best and worst place on earth – at the same time
25. you put an “s” or “a” at the end of foreign names, so you can conjugate them
26. In your eyes Coca Cola is the unhealthiest drink in the world and that drinking lots of beer, sugary juice and bread drink prolongs your life
27. you are trying to buy alcohol before 10 o’clock in the evening, but just in case you store some alcohol at home
28. hugging is reserved for sexual foreplay
29. you accept that 80 degrees C in a sauna is chilly, but 20 degrees C outside is freaking hot.
30. also, you accept -30 outside as a reasonable temperature, but anything under 22 indoors is unreasonable…
31. you sincerely believe that Laima is the best chocolate in the world.
32. you think it’s normal to not pay income taxes and know what is to get salary in envelope.
33. you’re not sure what to do when the traffic police only asks you to pay the official fine.
34. you know more than 50 Janis.
35. you know more than 20 Ligas, Ilzes, (each!)
36. you think metal doors are a necessity.
37. you can’t even imagine what is gallon, farenheits, inches or pound.
38. you know the difference between trolleybus and bus
39. you never smile in public when you’re alone
40. you laugh at Russian jokes.
41. you actually get these jokes.
42. you have crossed river on ice, because it was a shortcut
43. you don’t wonder when see a black big car with number plate “GARIK” or “SUPER”
44. you don’t know anyone who speaks less than 2 languages, and just few who speaks more than 3
1. you try to prove everyone that Latvia is in Northern Europe, not Eastern
2. tall blonde beauties in short skirts are nothing special for you anymore
3. you specify ‘no gas’ when asking for mineral water.
4. every year in the end of June you go to countryside with friends to have some beer and eat some cheese
5. you get used to explain abroad where Latvia is
6. you get shocked if somebody abroad does know where Latvia is.
7. you are proud that Latvian Lat is the most expensive currency
8. the phrase “go to seaside” means for you 15-20 minutes by car
9. ice hockey has become the most important thing in your life
10. half of the population working as “managers” seems reasonable to you
11. half of your friends disappear to study or work in Ireland or UK and you think that’s normal
12. you’ve learned the hard way that a triangle means women’s toilet and a triangle upside down means men’s
13. anything goes wrong you blame the Russians
14. anything goes wrong you blame the Latvians
15. you think hot chocolate means melted chocolate and you love it
16. you see someone smiling in public, you think: well, a bloody foreigner
17. a meal for you must contain either potato or meat, but usually both
18. you are afraid crossing a street, especially at zebra crossings or traffic lights
19. you feel guilty entering a flat wearing your shoes
20. everything 50m above sea-level seems like a mountain
21. you start counting the ground floor as first floor
22. you love the Baltic Sea and go swimming there at nearly any temperature
23. you love going to the Sauna, but always leave your trunks/bikini on
24. you consider Latvia the best and worst place on earth – at the same time
25. you put an “s” or “a” at the end of foreign names, so you can conjugate them
26. In your eyes Coca Cola is the unhealthiest drink in the world and that drinking lots of beer, sugary juice and bread drink prolongs your life
27. you are trying to buy alcohol before 10 o’clock in the evening, but just in case you store some alcohol at home
28. hugging is reserved for sexual foreplay
29. you accept that 80 degrees C in a sauna is chilly, but 20 degrees C outside is freaking hot.
30. also, you accept -30 outside as a reasonable temperature, but anything under 22 indoors is unreasonable…
31. you sincerely believe that Laima is the best chocolate in the world.
32. you think it’s normal to not pay income taxes and know what is to get salary in envelope.
33. you’re not sure what to do when the traffic police only asks you to pay the official fine.
34. you know more than 50 Janis.
35. you know more than 20 Ligas, Ilzes, (each!)
36. you think metal doors are a necessity.
37. you can’t even imagine what is gallon, farenheits, inches or pound.
38. you know the difference between trolleybus and bus
39. you never smile in public when you’re alone
40. you laugh at Russian jokes.
41. you actually get these jokes.
42. you have crossed river on ice, because it was a shortcut
43. you don’t wonder when see a black big car with number plate “GARIK” or “SUPER”
44. you don’t know anyone who speaks less than 2 languages, and just few who speaks more than 3