There's somebody for everybody is a myth.

[Barreldriver]

Up for discussion today is the subject of "there's somebody for everybody". Cannot count the number of times I have heard this uttered and each time I hear it I disagree with it.

For one I can cite members of my own family (aunts and uncles) who have lived and died single, this first proves that it is possible to go a whole life without a romantic partner, the reasons for this rooted in some form of undesirability or premature death (more often it is undesirability in the cases of my relatives who have been in this situation). Not everyone is wanted, plain and simple.

I am of a mind that those who utter such foolishness are willfully blind as to make their situations more tolerable (more oft than not the folks I've heard utter this are single with little likelihood of being otherwise or are in a catastrophe of a relationship). If such an idea is what one chooses to believe I am inclined to think that one ought to keep it to themselves as to avoid putting false hopes in the hearts of folks who may remain single til death. It is an act of torture to continually pester an individual with that and related phrases setting them up for repeated disappointment.

Ask oneself, is it better to get shot five times in non-lethal areas and slowly bleed out or suffer to a death from infection (to be equated with they myth in question) or is it better to have a quick death shot to the head (to be equated with being convinced upfront that ye may never find somebody)?

[gossimer]

I believe in quasi fate and quasi anti fate all in one.

I think some people, like say, a gorgeous model woman who every guy in the room wants, are meant to "find" someone special in the end.

I also think some people are not meant to find someone in the end, like an unattractive whoever person for whatever reason physically.

I think fate can go both ways. Not all ugly people don't find someone and not all pretty people do find someone, though the way I think fate works is that generally uglies don't find someone as much as non uglies. I think fate has a penance so to speak to reality as well so it is by no means assured.

[arcticwolf]

There is nothing wrong with being single, agreed 100%. On the other hand, having someone to share life with is desirable for most, if not because they believe in love, then for the security and support factors. Those who are mentally strong and independent will tend to value freedom more than companionship. As to the question if there is somebody for everybody, that is only a matter of attitude. If you are willing to put up with imperfections of another and all the restrictions that relationship entails then there is and if not, there is not. It's all in the mind, no matter how you cut it.

[Sikeliot]

Just because someone dies single doesn't mean there isn't someone for them.. it means they never met the person who was right for them, who was likely out there and they just didn't cross paths. But maybe this is me being optimistic because I want to meet my special someone :)

[Barreldriver]

I believe in quasi fate and quasi anti fate all in one.

I think some people, like say, a gorgeous model woman who every guy in the room wants, are meant to "find" someone special in the end.

I also think some people are not meant to find someone in the end, like an unattractive whoever person for whatever reason physically.

I think fate can go both ways. Not all ugly people don't find someone and not all pretty people do find someone, though the way I think fate works is that generally uglies don't find someone as much as non uglies. I think fate has a penance so to speak to reality as well so it is by no means assured.

As for general unglies vs. non-uglies, I am inclined to think that the non-uglies who remain single have some other flaw with their character which would prevent them from forming relationships whether it was brought about by mental defect or traumatic past event.

I'd be careful with the word fate, it can be ambiguous at times and may not always account for those with an internal locus of control, I would agree with this subject as a matter of fate in the sense of a series of circumstances that befall someone, how the circumstances are brought about is variable.

[Barreldriver]

If you are willing to put up with imperfections of another and all the restrictions that relationship entails then there is and if not, there is not.

This aspect here depends on mutuality. One can have the mentality necessary to put up with the flaws of others and cope with the restrictions of a relationship but may not find someone to reciprocate for a variety of reasons which would otherwise make the seeker undesired.

[arcticwolf]

This aspect here depends on mutuality. One can have the mentality necessary to put up with the flaws of others and cope with the restrictions of a relationship but may not find someone to reciprocate for a variety of reasons which would otherwise make the seeker undesired.

Valid point. I assumed it but should have verbalized it.

[Drawing-slim]

There is nothing wrong with being single, agreed 100%. On the other hand, having someone to share life with is desirable for most, if not because they believe in love, then for the security and support factors. Those who are mentally strong and independent will tend to value freedom more than companionship. As to the question if there is somebody for everybody, that is only a matter of attitude. If you are willing to put up with imperfections of another and all the restrictions that relationship entails then there is and if not, there is not. It's all in the mind, no matter how you cut it.I was thinking last 24 hrs as i had to wake up around noon today and play a WSOP event.
I was stressing about having to wake up before noon instead of 4-5 in the afternoon which i usually wake up.
Then i started to imagine being married and having to put up with someone elses schedule and sleeping paterns and hours for the rest of my life! i freaked out just imagining:D
I'm so used to simplify my life to a zen master level like, and as i get older the thought of marriage ane puting up with shit some of my married friends have to put up with "and claiming happily married" it sort of freaks me out.

[arcticwolf]

I was thinking last 24 hrs as i had to wake up around noon today and play a WSOP event.
I was stressing about having to wake up before noon instead of 4-5 in the afternoon which i usually wake up.
Then i started to imagine being married and having to put up with someone elses schedule and sleeping paterns and hours for the rest of my life! i freaked out just imagining:D
I'm so used to simplify my life to a zen master level like, and as i get older the thought of marriage ane puting up with shit some of my married friends have to put up with "and claiming happily married" it sort of freaks me out.

I know what you mean. I love being by myself, and living in the sticks. I can't even imagine having someone else order me around. I guess guys like us are doomed to be single. I'm not complaining though, I don't think you are either. ;)

[Barreldriver]

I know what you mean. I love being by myself, and living in the sticks. I can't even imagine having someone else order me around. I guess guys like us are doomed to be single. I'm not complaining though, I don't think you are either. ;)

I wish I had that mentality, I am one of those who is in a mostly solitary situation despite intentions. The conflict, though able to be coped with, takes its toll.

[arcticwolf]

I wish I had that mentality, I am one of those who is in a mostly solitary situation despite intentions. The conflict, though able to be coped with, takes its toll.

It's a matter of training the mind, or feeding it the right "diet". The fastest way to learn this lesson is to be with someone who makes your life hell. When you get out of that relationship you'll never look down on loneliness again. :D

[Aces High]

I wish I had that mentality, I am one of those who is in a mostly solitary situation despite intentions. The conflict, though able to be coped with, takes its toll.

You sound like you cant wait to get into a long term relationship.

You must be out of your fucking tree old son........make the most of being single whilst you can because believe me one of these days some girl will get her claws into you and thats the end of it.

Stop mulling over it and thinking about it......get out there and live.

Heres a good rule of thumb...too clever is dumb...;)

[Corvus]

I do not believe in this either. Not everybody is destined to find a suitable partner.
There are lots of people who stay on their own forever.
Maybe it is due to their bad look, their social incompatibilty, their exaggerated expectations or other unknown reasons.

I also think that today it is much harder to find a partner than in old times.
Still 50 years ago 2/3 of marriages have been arranged in my region, not talking about earlier times.
Today this is not usual practise any longer which is advantagous in a certain way for some, but creates a lot of problems for others.

[Supreme American]

For one I can cite members of my own family (aunts and uncles) who have lived and died single, this first proves that it is possible to go a whole life without a romantic partner, the reasons for this rooted in some form of undesirability or premature death (more often it is undesirability in the cases of my relatives who have been in this situation). Not everyone is wanted, plain and simple.

You're assuming they made an effort to find someone or made an effort to make themselves more desirable.

[Supreme American]

I do not believe in this either. Not everybody is destined to find a suitable partner.
There are lots of people who stay on their own forever.
Maybe it is due to their bad look, their social incompatibilty, their exaggerated expectations or other unknown reasons.

I also think that today it is much harder to find a partner than in old times.
Still 50 years ago 2/3 of marriages have been arranged in my region, not talking about earlier times.
Today this is not usual practise any longer which is advantagous in a certain way for some, but creates a lot of problems for others.

Basically everyone was married even 50 years ago, and kids were rarely born out of wedlock. Social liberalism is what first made popping kids out of wedlock an OK thing to do, and it has also served to delegitimize and marginalize the importance of marriage and the family unit. People now treat marriage the way they treat their heritage: irrelevant and disposable on a whim.

[Supreme American]

There is nothing wrong with being single, agreed 100%. On the other hand, having someone to share life with is desirable for most, if not because they believe in love, then for the security and support factors. Those who are mentally strong and independent will tend to value freedom more than companionship. As to the question if there is somebody for everybody, that is only a matter of attitude. If you are willing to put up with imperfections of another and all the restrictions that relationship entails then there is and if not, there is not. It's all in the mind, no matter how you cut it.

I don't get the mentality and the language behind this. I keep hearing how marriage is "restrictive." The only people I can see frankly feeling restricted by it are the promiscuous and immature. For everyone else I think it is something added that enriches one's life, having a very close, trusted, loving, and loyal companion. This kind of indirect demonization of marriage wasn't popularized until the 1960s. Marriage is not for weaklings, it is for human beings. Humans need that kind of companionship, and imo, suffer for not having it.

[Graham]

Like I've said, get yourself over here. Am sure you'd do well over here with your banjo pub shindig playing.

[Barreldriver]

You sound like you cant wait to get into a long term relationship.

You must be out of your fucking tree old son........make the most of being single whilst you can because believe me one of these days some girl will get her claws into you and thats the end of it.

Ye misunderstand a bit, I've got pressure from the dying generation of my kingroup to settle down and I want to do my duty as a member of that kingroup, I had spent the past few years of my life doing nowt much else than getting liquored up and breaking the law, a bit more tired these days.


Stop mulling over it and thinking about it......get out there and live.

Heres a good rule of thumb...too clever is dumb...;)

May be young but done a fair bit of living it up, wasted thousands of dollars and had plenty afternoons ruined by court. :p Ain't got the drive to be rowdy no more. To think, if I had all the money back for my various fines, court fees, restitution payments, liquor bills, resulting medical I'd be able to purchase a small tract of land.

[ricko0812]

If you type how you talk i would work on that first. Just giving you some tough love buddy.

[Barreldriver]

If you type how you talk i would work on that first. Just giving you some tough love buddy.

I'm being lazy with the type, 9 a.m. in the process of eating "brekkist", not finished with coffee, and this isn't the most high brow thread. :p As for how I talk, though my speech is nowhere near as thick as that of my great grandparents and my few remaining aunts and uncles in county the locals up here in Ohio have their fair troubles deciphering my speech, though it has improved a bit since my youth.

[Aces High]

Ye misunderstand a bit, I've got pressure from the dying generation of my kingroup to settle down and I want to do my duty as a member of that kingroup,

Fuck them...you were not put on this earth to live up to their expectations.

Tell them that these things take time and if you go round picking the orchard youll end up picking a crab.;)

[Barreldriver]

Fuck them...you were not put on this earth to live up to their expectations.

Tell them that these things take time and if you go round picking the orchard youll end up picking a crab.;)

Or pick up tons of crabs. :p

[Supreme American]

Fuck them...you were not put on this earth to live up to their expectations.

Tell them that these things take time and if you go round picking the orchard youll end up picking a crab.;)

It has nothing to do with "their" expectations and a battle of the wills. It is standard custom of our people to follow a certain healthy pattern of living which has sustained us as a people for centuries. There is nothing to rebel against.

[Aces High]

It has nothing to do with "their" expectations and a battle of the wills. It is standard custom of our people to follow a certain healthy pattern of living which has sustained us as a people for centuries. There is nothing to rebel against.

Im not saying theres anything to rebel against.

I just dont think bowing down to peer pressure will help in any way.....i mean i speak from experience and have been all through that bollocks myself.
Its not like some game of musical chairs.....where everybody is rushing about and making cunts of themselves.

This guy just needs to relax,live your life and the right girl will come along.
Theres no point in worrying about it....the norns have your path all planned out anyway.

[sean]

"True love" as in there's somebody for everybody is absolute bullshit. That's all fantasy shit and irrational female emotional doublespeak. Lot of women have the idea that if they don't click perfectly with a person on first meeting them, then there's no love and they need to find someone else (Disney Princess Syndrome). The fact is that love is knowing that someone cares about you, so you want to make them happy. Love is something that grows over years, and not something that just pops up out of nowhere.

Men who based their relationships on "true love" are usually disappointed in marriage. Women change after marriage and especially when the biochemical reaction of "true love" fades. This is when men become miserable in marriage and are confused and feel deceived, because their wives change.

[Evrim]

True, it's not that simple. There are incels destined to stay single forever.

[Xz2k9]

THAT'S RIGHT FUCK THA FREE WORLD

[coolfrenchguy]

first : why always so much negativism?
secundo : there is different parameters to set,sure there is maybe not for all,but if you set the right means,you could and you should accentuate your chances, i have my little ideas
tertio: if you were able to tongue a girl and to bang too by the past,why aren't you able to do it again? not available for the pure web autists incels ,some are really desperate cases,mine is a bit complicated but not completly desperate,i 'am strong you have no idea,just a lack of resources,for now,the things will came as they came but i'am very determinated,the main traits of all these sects with endless names,there are all defeatists and not determinated,and resigned too,they have leaving the boat by auto-resignation,because they whipped themselves,it's a very common trait,they jealous inappropriatly because the haven't try to understand how works some mechanisms,it's why they will ended,alone,probably,it's just a short statement of what i had could read and understand in diagonal,i don't waste my time with this toxic universe it's don't deserve me at any case i'am ten times stronger than them,if you're not tough with yourself and refuse the mediocity you will ended alone for sure,i'am the complete contrary of all this ambient negativity and mediocrity but my path is full of obstacles,for now,i say for now,i build my own tools,iam a IGOMW , cogito ergo sum,i going on my way,i learn i read,i learn the things at not to made,it's not rocket science,sure you have some parameters ,two are important physical and appearance and money,i have the first one more or less,more than less,but i lack of the second one for now,i said for now.

Sean had mock me a lot some few times ago,but dear canadian i have pretty fucking level you have no idea,i'am the complete opposite of the ambient dumberness

seen seeking a partner it's like mounting a buisness or sigining a contract ,the processes are almost the same,based on bi-partism,and in this case is really the truth
you have the steps and you have the means,after all is question to know how to weight ,to know how,when and where to look,something than you need to,is to be tough and with no concessions ,something than you set in a frame, it's my way of seeing the things
i don't "date",several dating is for the ones who don't know that they want, i will build something on a complete different field

all the men who refering themselves to some stupid greek letter ,build on complete hoaxes, for designing themselves are themselves failures,cogito ergo sum,i don't live throughout the others,I AM

[JamesBond007]

I personally think there is no point in getting married unless one wants kids. I don't want kids necessarily but maybe some woman will talk me into it.

[Daos777]

Holy shit this post is old. I remember 2012 I was disappointed when the Mayan predictions didn’t come true.