How to Eat Like Me: The Most Important Edition

[Convoy]

Allo. Today I'll be teaching you how to be a manly man. Not the sort that goes to the gym, gets tired and leaves, but the kind that goes to work, goes home, fucks his wife, eats some pork pie, sleeps, gets up, repeats the process.

You might not know who I am, but you will now.


Starting off:

BREAKFAST:
Eggs. Lots of eggs. Boiled eggs. Scrambled eggs. Eggs and cheese. Eggs and ham. Anything with eggs. They're a good source of protein and (supposedly) great for the mind.
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Bacon. High in fat, yes, but very tasty, and very high in protein too. Replace this with bread if you're a sissy-lot. You should be able to make a single package of bacon with around 25-30 strips last a whole week. Use moderation.
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WHOLE MILK. Not that wretched white water they sell at starbucks.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cnlc_eHA9zg


LUNCH:
Not much to lunch really. Something to keep you full until dinner.
A beef and sauerkraut sandwich. Add any kind of cheese, it's all good. Have some drink on the side. I hear a glass of milk is good with lunch too.

You can also choose to have a pork pie if you want to be authentic.


DINNER:

Chips, salad (with purple onions, this is NOT an option!!) and a variety of options.. Has to have meat. I love my meat. If you don't eat meat, you're gay.

And I don't like gays.



SNACKS:

Pork rinds are fatty, but tasty. Good for chewing on over a long period of time.

Fruit is for women. I don't eat fruit. I exclusively eat carrots with ranch if I want something healthy.