How To Sound Less Rude In English?

[Roy]

I apologise for the inconvenience.

I am very sorry for the inconvenience, sir.




In English as long as you do not talk to the Queen of England and you don't use any profanities you shouldn't have significant issues. In Polish it is far more complicated as you're not supposed to use 2nd person in your speech when you talk to someone who has an authority and there are distinct forms.

[Harley]

You sound fine to me so far. I’ve not seen you being rude.

Elder Toguro is a cool avi. I’m in the middle of rewatching Yu Yu Hakusho.

[SardiniaAtlantis]

Just add a after sentences that could be taken the wrong way.

Don't be blunt, instead of saying, you are wrong i don't think this cat is meowtid i think its fluffid, say; do you see fluffid influence? or say 'interesting! i think its more fluffid?'

And that is how the stereotypical passive aggressive Anglo Saxon behavior was born.
“Did you just shag my wife? Didn’t you think it might be wrong to shag my wife?”

[♥ Lily ♥]

I always think that 'may I?' sounds more subtle, slightly more courteous, and a little less blunt and direct than asking 'can I?' during questions.

E.g: 'May I suggest something? May I use the bathroom?'

The term 'quite' is also popular and useful when softening sentences to sound more polite. 'I'm sorry, but I don't quite agree.'

[♥ Lily ♥]

1. Listen and be understanding

If you show other people that you are listening to them, and that you understand them, they will be more willing to listen to you and accept your opinion. Don't just say "I disagree", show them that you are listening and that you understand them before you explain your opinion.

You can do this by using statements like:

Yes, but...

I see what you mean, but...

I agree up to a point, but

For example:

I think we should wait until a better opportunity comes along.

Yes, but we might not get another opportunity like this for a while.

I think we should ask for a 20% discount because it will show them that we are serious.

I see what you mean, but I think 20% might be a bit too much. It might put them off.

2. Avoid negative words - instead use positive words in a negative form

People react to positive sounding words, even if they are used with a negative auxiliary.

Don't say: I think that's a bad idea.

Say: I don't think that's such a good idea.

Let's go for a good cop, bad cop approach in this negotiation!

I don't think that's such a good idea. They might see through it.

3. Say the magic word: Sorry

This word can be used in many ways: to interrupt, to apologise, to show you don't understand, to disagree. It diffuses tension and it allows you to start a statement more comfortably.

Sorry, but can I just say something here

Sorry, but I don't really agree

Sorry, but I think that's out of the question

4. Use little words to soften your statements

Break down negative sentences with some softeners.

Don't say: I don't like it

Say: I don't really like it I'm afraid

Don't say: Can I say something?

Say: Can I just say something here?

Don't say: I didn't catch that

Say: Sorry, I didn't quite catch that

5. Avoid 'finger pointing' statements with the word 'you'

This is aggressive and too direct. Try to avoid saying 'you' and put the focus on 'I' or 'we'.

Don't say: You don't understand me.

Say: Perhaps I'm not making myself clear.

Don't say: You didn't explain this point.

Say: I didn't understand this point.

Don't say: You need to give us a better price.

Say: We're looking for a better price.

5 Tips for Polite and Diplomatic Language: https://www.londonschool.com/blog/5-...atic-language/

[♥ Lily ♥]

Also, here's a few examples of rude ways to address people:

'Oi fella, 'ow much do ya charge for a pint?'
'Cor, blimey mate... what a rip-off!'
'What ya f*ckin' starin' at?'
'Are ya 'aving a larf mate?'
'Are you pullin' my pisser, ya plonker/dork!?'
'Faaack off before I smash ya faackin' face in.'

(Uncivilised, rude, disrespectful, intimidating, unrefined, coarse, harsh, and vulgar English.)

Excessive swearing in sentences is also considered as vulgar and rude.

[Mr.G]

Just add a after sentences that could be taken the wrong way.

Don't be blunt, instead of saying, you are wrong i don't think this cat is meowtid i think its fluffid, say; do you see fluffid influence? or say 'interesting! i think its more fluffid?'

This second part you describe here is a skill many do not have. One can be both polite and honest. The two are not mutually exclusive.

[♥ Lily ♥]

Some more tips are to avoid certain words such as 'mulatto/mulatta' and 'negro', as both are deemed as offensive, racist, and very rude mannerisms in the English language - even if those words are used in the Spanish language. We generally say 'biracial' or 'mixed race' or 'black'.

In the U.K., the term 'wog' is also considered as rude and offensive towards Indian and south Asian people. (Along with the crude and offensive term of 'golliwog' for black people.)

The term 'Oriental' is considered as perfectly fine in the UK, but it's considered as offensive in the U.S. towards East Asians.

The term 'Eskimo' is also considered as rude and offensive, so it's best to avoid using that word.

Also it's considered as vulgar, offensive, and very rude mannerisms to use the term 'kraut' for a German person, 'paki' for a Pakistani person, 'honky' for a white person, 'sheep shagger' for a Welsh person, 'frog' for a French person, 'limey' for a British person, 'dago' for Italians/Portuguese/Spanish, 'spics' or 'wetbacks' for Latin Americans, 'kike' for a Jewish person, or 'yank/yankee' for an American person.

A full list of ethnic slurs which are considered as offensive, disrespectful, inconsiderate, and rude:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_ethnic_slurs

The terms 'Pom/Pommies' for British people, 'Aussies' for Australians, and 'Kiwis' for New Zealanders are all fine and acceptable by many people... and are actually endearing terms.

Using sophistication and tact during conversations is also important, along with avoiding being too blatant if you dislike someone, or too blunt or argumentative if you disagree with them over something. (Online fora tend to be less formal places though... so lots of anonymous people often type hostile and rude things online that they wouldn't dare say to somebody's face in real life.)

Asking strangers very direct personal questions (without considerately taking a bit of time to get to know each other first,) is considered as a bit intrusive.

Polite ladies and gentlemen tend to be courteous and considerate towards others, even if they don't necessarily like a person - they politely keep their hostile feelings and thoughts to themselves and try to be courteous.