Fun fact: Cops beat their spouses like no one else and "typically handle cases of police family violence informally." Snyder's solution to stopping abusive relationships? Let's ban* all guns and let the good neighborhood police officer take care of your battered ass. L M F A O!

____________

Risk factors:
"The first 90 days after a victim leaves her partner is the most dangerous time for them of any kind of violence," Snyder says.

Snyder: Narcissism is one of the key components of an abuser. ... [Most] abusers, in fact, are not people with anger problems. Generally speaking, they are about power and control over one person or the people in their family. They're often very gregarious. Only about a quarter of the abusers fit that stereotypical definition of someone who is, you know, generally angry. And so the narcissism plays out in the idea that they are owed something, in the idea that they are entitled to their authority, that their partners have to be subservient to them. There's very often traditional gender dynamics in abusive relationships.

[...]

GROSS: Do you think he could sniff your lack of self-esteem?
DUBUS: Yes, I do. I think he was expert at figuring out my vulnerabilities and figuring out how to manipulate me and how to leverage all of that to get what he wanted.

[...]

Mom, Dad told me your first marriage was abusive. And she said, yeah, it was. It was. And then she told me that her childhood home, in fact, had also been abusive.

[It's no coincidence I also highlighted "also." The broadcast version briefly touched on the subject on how perps/abusers are, on average, more likely to have their own history of being victims to domestic abuse/violence but that part is conveniently missing from the transcript.

The end:
Dubus: Dr. Jacquelyn Campbell from Johns Hopkins' School of Nursing had done this really interesting research study on femicide, and she identified 20 lethality factors that are in play as the violence is escalating. ... Threats to kill [are] a really important risk factor. Strangulation — we know that in 50% of domestic violence cases, strangulation is used. Do they have access to a gun? Are they threatening to kill themselves? Is the behavior escalating? Is there extreme and constant jealousy? Those are some of those lethality factors.

Just leave the abusive relationship, bro:
Snyder: I spent almost 10 years researching this. It's not that they don't leave; it's that we don't know what leaving looks like. So leaving, as Suzanne said, is a process, not an event. And what happens is they kind of dip their toes into the system. They see if there are resources for them. In many cases, the abuser has such control over a victim [that] he or she (most of the time "he") has isolated a victim from friends, from family, from other types of resources. In many cases they're not able to hold jobs, so they have no economic resources of their own.

There was a woman that I covered in Ohio who had never even opened a bank account on her own, and so when she finally managed to get free — and she got free because her daughter killed her father — she didn't know how to do anything. She didn't drive on her own. She couldn't navigate financial systems. She didn't know how to pay for the house. So now that's a really extreme example, but in those cases where are you going to go? What are you going to do? How are you going to do it?

[...]

Snyder: Recanting happens as much as 70 to 80% of the time. Sometimes they recant because it wasn't a serious incident. I have to allow that sometimes that happens. But most of the time, they recant because they know that they're going to have to continue to negotiate with that abuser, particularly if they have kids, and they fear retaliation, so they recant as a show of solidarity. ... Part of the psychology of an abusive relationship is that an abuser has to convince a victim that he is more powerful than the system.

United states domestic violence prevention resources:

NPR 2019.

Full Version & Transcript: https://www.wbur.org/npr/721005929/n...estic-violence
Related: https://www.npr.org/2019/04/26/71720...arlier-thought

_______________
(*That sure did work swell for Europe/United Kingdom, didn't it, Timmy? :^)