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i’m going to put some of this in a spoiler, serving as a trigger/content warning.
Spoiler!
i recently went through a traumatic event in which my health tanked that i almost died in september. i’ve had a lot of downtime to think while recovering. i kept thinking that a lot of people that i’m connected to on social media etc, i invest both my limited time and energy in giving people attention, love, validation, but when i was sick, i didn’t want to tell anyone but a handful of people what i was going while i was going through it because my thought was i don’t care to be a passing dinner topic where people say useless shit to show another person that they’re empathetic and spiritual and such good people.
i’ve been avoiding addressing the topic to myself for a while, and i’ve always kept busy to keep my mind off of it. i fucked up my scheduling for appointments next week due to procrastination. i remember dr. laura schlessinger saying on her radio program that procrastination is a form of fear.
Symptoms of PTSD
via https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/art...#ptsd-symptoms
- They reexperience the trauma through nightmares, flashbacks, or intrusive thoughts.
- They intentionally avoid things that remind them of the traumatic event.
- They are easily startled.
- They have unusual angry outbursts.
- They seem anxious or depressed, especially in ways that directly relate to the trauma. For example, a survivor of sexual assault might be more anxious or depressed about sexual activity in the relationship.
- They have a distorted sense of reality about the trauma and may feel guilty or ashamed.
- They have intense negative thoughts, low self-esteem, or a sense of hopelessness.
- They lose interest in activities they once enjoyed.
- They struggle to remember parts of the traumatic event.
i wonder at this point if i had gotten therapy earlier in life, instead of listening to people tell me that it was unnecessary and a waste of my time, would i have been able to prevent broken relationships and bad health? i have my first therapy session scheduled for next week.
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