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It's not uncommon for women to ask men out. I don't think it's ever been that uncommon. Of course, women don't ask as much as men, and typically, they're more flirty and signaling in hopes that you will ask instead. None who've approached me for a date have ever looked like a masculine woman or seemed domineering. Usually they just complimented appearances like eyes something.
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I believe you, but the ratio of men and women at the gym highly favors women. She gets to pick out of the dozen of men that go to the gym while the guy has to hope that they are a part of the 1-2% of eligible bachelors. It's the juggernaut effect. She gets to pick good-looking guys above her pay grade because the good-looking guys lack abundance in their current setting.
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Some women are shy and try their luck with someone they like. If I don't like them, then I don't date them. Simple. Your latter example is how most relationships that are good start, but you never know unless you accept them out on a date, regardless if they're hinting at you with flirting or if they ask you out bluntly.
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