5
You know you're Dutch when...
01. You hate wine
02. You had your first beer by the age of 11
03. You smoked 10 cigarettes a day by the age of 12
04. You smoked weed by the age of 13
05. You're tall, you have blue eyes and blonde hair
06. You speak 3 languages and think its normal
07. You can translate Turkish and Maroccan insults to Dutch
08. You know Gouda is the best cheese ever
09. You fail in Dutch society if you don't finish school
10. You're pissed off by people who think all Dutch come from Amsterdam
11. You consider people with Indonesian ancestors Dutch
12. You hate tourists, if you don't live in Amsterdam
13. You consider the French arrogant, but you're obviously not much different
14. You watch woman at red light district like they're art
15. You never talk about money
16. You think Americans are dumb
17. You're atheist, not to mention that The Netherlands has been one of the most religious country in western Europe.
18. You consider all people from Brabant farmers
19. You consider Belgians dumb
20. You've walked on clogs once, but didn't like it
21. You always argue about how much you disagree with the government, but protect them when a foreigner joins the conversation.
22. You'd say this to the wife of an American, "after tasting these pancakes, I understand why you're husband is so fat"
23. You think its weird to eat cats, dogs or rabbits but raw herring is a delicacy
24. You paid atleast 1500 eur for your drivers license
25. In case you're a male, you think footbal is religion
26. Hooliganism between Feyenoord & Ajax is as amusing as the game alone
27. You never give tips
28. You consider a small hill a mountain
29. You're convinced that Dutch is the hardest language to learn ever
30. Germans are moffen
31. You think soft drugs is legal in The Netherlands
32. You think its normal that prostitutes have to pay taxes
33. You learned cycling before walking
34. You consider a cheap apartement in Spain as luxury while on vacation
35. You're suprised when a train arrives on schedule
36. You pretend to like the color orange
37. All foreigners blame you for being rude, while you were just being honest
38. You own a kaasschaaf and believe every household should own one
39. You like opportunities, colonizing Indonesia and South Africa were two of them
40. Your toilet is in a seperate space instead of in the bathroom
41. You never waste food, instead you save it in the freezer
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