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yes, I lose muscle if I'm excessively sedentary for a longer period, like I've been since pandemic with working from home, not having to move around much. as my metabolism burns fat rapidly and no activity/exercise signals to my muscles I don't need extra mass. well, I do see around men looking just like me, at least in Romania it's not something unseen and I don't look abnormal in any way to others, just a really skinny type (which again, I see around as well), but I do need a bit of extra kilos not to look this skinny
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I get that muscle weighs more than flab. In fact, that's one reason that the BS height and weight charts should be changed. I also get that inactive individuals can be underweight if they don't eat like they should. I just can't get past the fact that you sound anorexic, because even Southeast Asian men would look like sticks at that weight.
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but it's nonsense - if anything I am trying to eat extra, not less, so in no way this corresponds to eating disorders. I am the opposite - I wish to gain weight, but not only fat, this is why I don't eat added sugars stuff while alcohol I quit because of drinking too much beer (not like getting drunk, but drinking beer instead of water at home, a bit now, a bit later, at the end of the day I could drink like 4-5 0.5l beers in summer, daily, just instead of water, which was very bad for my digestive system), which brought me to a very bad acid reflux and gastritis and irritable colon, which improved a whole lot since then and I don't crave alcohol or sweets anymore. but I do eat normally and snack on healthy stuff like nuts etc, got a normal blood pressure after over 10 years of mild hypertension (140/90 and 150/10 was the norm for me before getting to this alcohol-free/sugar-free way of life).
I understand I should be lifting weights to gain weight, but I really don't like it, I am not a gym guy at all, and I also get funny heart beats sometimes when I push myself too much, arrhythmias and short breathing, which scare me a bit and thus discourage me from intensive workout - I should start with some mild workout if I find a program to follow, I have a set of dumbbells at home.
I also started brisk walking (I sometimes average 9km/hour in my walking session) for three weeks now, except weekends, in the hour before work I got in the morning after dropping kids to school/kindergarten, but for now I lost half a kilo from it so I need to balance it with lifting or starting to eat unhealthy again, to at least gain fat
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I also have a gracile bone frame, that gives a couples of fewer kilos as well I think. for example my father in law is the opposite, he is a contemporary Neanderthal, with very thick bones naturally, he also works all day long in the fields, his orchard, his vineyard etc and by weight he'd be overweight while he's very fit, except the beer belly, but muscular over the very heavy natural frame. at the same height with me his shoulder or elbow or knee bones (where you can easily see bone size without muscle and fat) are double my size (or more, for shoulders) in width alone. when he had a metal rod place on his hip the doctor said to him after the surgery that it took 3 men to place it, as he has "buffalo bones". in spite of my small frame, never broke a bone
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My dad was like your father-in-law. His ring was too loose for my *thumb* in high school, and my build was mesomorphic with medium-sized bones, neither thick nor thin. It could just be that you're ectomorphic in a healthy, normal way. Can you wife beat you in arm wrestling?
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no, in spite of me being naturally skinny I've never been weak or regarded as so - very athletic while a teenager by the activities I was doing, a lot of sport and of sports in high school. some weakness came in more recently due to bad habits, drinking, skipping meals and the inactivity since 2020 (pandemic, never took up again my previous walking, running, football etc), but not naturally weak, that type
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I trained like a professional athlete in the past. I gained fifty freaking pounds during the COVID event, thanks largely to my former friend, pizza. I lost a bunch of it since then. Still, I likely would get killed in the ring or on a mat right now (just training for it).
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