Man getting angry about girlfriend talking or even lightly flirting with other man would be considered jealous. Man being indifferent about such situation would be considered cold and not caring about his woman. So women desire balanced response:- show enough jealousy for her to understand you care, but not too much jealousy so she interprets you are insecure.

If your woman is physically touched, then it is not friendly interaction, but intimate one. So it is appropriate for a man to get violent. But then again, if your woman enjoys being caressed, then maybe more rational response could be reassessment of your relationship with her. That is to say, not necessarily to dump her, but maybe to find a different "understanding".